How is it that the greatest cyclist would be so handsome? When the stars lined up with Mr Merckx, they all lined up. Cycling does seem to produce a lot of handsome athletes but really Eddy, didn’t you already have it all? He was already the most driven, most meticulous, the hardest and the fastest….
Whenever I do anything, I try my best to project the confidence of Han Solo leaving the cantina after cooking Greedo which has been scientifically proven to be the maximum possible score on the Casually Deliberate Scale. Being Casually Deliberate comes down to two fundamental units of knowledge that you must hold unwaveringly within your heart: That you…
It’s still a month away. You’ve got plenty of base. If those words were being spoken about an upcoming DJ set, then I’d probably not take them completely with a grain of salt. When they are in reference to a 160km event with a shitload of hills, and the sum total of post-KT riding can…
Even if you don’t own an espresso machine, you might want to own one of these. It’s art. It’s form and function in a seamless little object. If you do own an espresso machine and you call yourself a Cyclist, you will be very happy if you do own one. This tool is reason enough…
There are three subjects you should not bring up in new company: Politics, Saddle Bags, and Helmets. In my experience, in fact, politics are a much safer subject with a stranger than that of the cursed EPMS; no subject I’ve ever broached has been met with more vitriol. Except maybe the use of helmets. I’m not…
Riding in bad weather is an incredible experience assuming you don’t fall off and break your hip, or you don’t get hit by a car. Those realities aside, the weather adds a dimension to the ride that you simply don’t have on a sunny day, lovely as they are. The other day I was riding early…
People, please grab hold of your butts: we are experiencing a V.V magnitude Awesome Quake, and it is sporting a totally rad lid. Further instructions will be provided. Have a pleasant day.
Belgium has a host of great names, and not just for Cyclists. Riding past a farm equipment outlet or workshop after Keepers Tour 15 had been consigned to the history books, I was taken by the name Bart Vanacker so much that I commented to William that I was seriously considering changing my own handle to…
My first bike was a Sears Moonlight Special. It was literally a piece of shit – figuratively. I mean, it would only “literally” be a piece of shit if shit was made of sand-filled steel tubes salvaged from the plumbing of the local sewage facility. Which it might have been, but I simply don’t have…
Do we love our inanimate objects too much? I don’t think so. I remember getting home from yet another Sunday ride, completely ruined. I had to thank my bike for getting me home again. I love my bike. Modern centaurs, we are not Cyclists without out bikes. @gaff sent this in from Sweden. He does…
Before we move on to the last Monument of the season, let’s reflect on what happened in Richmond. My deeply held fears of the American organizers making a mess of things were unrealized. The two cobbled climbs were spectacles and the resulting road races were pretty damn fine. Personally, I don’t think the Worlds should…
In grade school, a teacher once asked me to name my favorite color, a query to which I responded with the only logical answer for any prepubescent boy surrounded by scary girls in a small classroom: “Celeste.” “No, you have to pick a real color.” While the rest of the world believes the most iconic color in Cycling…
[rule number=12/] The only parents who proclaim to have a favorite child are the ones who have only one; all the other ones pretend they don’t have a favorite because they are each “different and special in their own way”. It’s complete bollocks, that, and we all know every parent does in fact have a favorite,…
You can never have too much Muur. It’s a proven scientific fact that too little Muur can be detrimental to a Cyclist’s state of mind, even if they have never ridden the most iconic climb in Flanders. And if they have, then the withdrawals are something not to be taken lightly. Every so often we…
The Road Cycling World Championships are on our doorstep. The USA is hosting, which makes me nervous immediately. How can we fuck this up? Ask Taylor Phinney for starters. This event has not been hosted by the USA since Moreno Argentin won in Colorado almost thirty years ago. We just don’t have the experience to…
With the transitions of seasons occurring all over the world as Summer shifts to Fall in the Northern Hemisphere and Winter to Spring in the Southern, we are faced with the seasonal challenge of how to kit up properly for volatile and variable weather conditions. One of the most common mistakes made, apart from overdressing,…
Cycling is all about energy. If you don’t have it, you don’t have it. It can be sucked out of you as quickly as a Dyson sucks up dust. Even on those days when you feel a million bucks, use your energy unwisely and you’ll be spat out the back and struggling to make a piece of…
Somewhere in the 10 cm thick Velominati editorial handbook is an admonishment about running articles about rides. @RobSandy’s bit has the word Roubaix in its title, it took place in Wales and more than one Velominati was riding, so we move ahead. It is almost a Cogal without the excessive drinking. Thanks @RobSandy for spending…
I have been spoiled rotten this summer as I alluded to last week and was evidenced through the flatness of the tires on my Nine Bike. I rode more this summer than I have in recent memory and I rode in the rain exactly one time; @snowgeek wondered if it might rain and I scoffed at the…
I did go out seeking endorphins and inspiration. These articles don’t just write themselves. A climb and descent might just get enough O2 to the brain to knock something loose. Descending from our climb I did get inspired. An article about Rule #55; a descent is enjoyed so much more if you climbed it first….