Anatomy of a Photo: The Shoulders of Giants

The question tackled here is of carrying the bicycle, should it require carrying. The non-cyclist is perhaps more inclined to consider carrying their bicycle than is the Cyclist. Examples that come to mind include the navigation of a giant mud pit or a steep twisty narrow snowy descent, where the uninitiated may erroneously contemplate the likelihood of survival between riding the bike as opposed to walking or carrying it. Other examples might be bunny-hopping a 1 meter vertical wall where a slight miscalculation may result in going from being Awesome to merely being OK.

But if one thing is certain, should matters come to carrying the bicycle, it is the shoulder that should be employed for this task, as time-tested by cyclocross riders for well over a century. No further research is required to resolve this matter. And, should the question of leather handles come up, I put it to you thusly: are you a giant hipster douche nozzle, or are you a hardman with Ultimate Rule #5 Leg and balls so big you could wear a sun visor with a gauze stocking cap?

Thanks to KRX10 for making me aware of this abomination of a leather handle.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • Shoulder: yes. And it goes without saying (though I'm saying it): right shoulder.

    Funny aside: The line "shoulders of giants" comes from a famous conciliatory letter that Isaac Newton (himself an impressive grimpeur in his day) wrote to Robert Hooke (more a domestique within the Royal Society). They had a long and protracted disagreement, which had become quite bitter (to the extent that, even after the reconciliation, Newton had all Hooke's portraits, etc., burned when he became head of the Royal Society). The great natural philosophers of the day (the rest of the peloton) tried to bring them back together and orchestrate a truce. Hooke conceded a key point to Newton, whose famous reply was the seemingly humble response that "if I have seen further, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants." Nice notion. Except that Hooke was likely a cripple and very short, so if Newton was standing on the shoulders of giants, there's an implicit suggestion that Hooke wasn't one of them.

  • @meursault

    Mostly to keep the head lice in place.

    What's great about this photo ain't the carry, is the loose slope he's climbing to get BACK on the road.

  • For cyclocross?  Absolutely.

    For mountain biking?  Yes, if you survive the crash down the mountainside, and if the geometry of the frame allows (mine does not).

    For road cycling?  The only time you should be carrying your bike on your shoulder is if you lauch off the road on the descent of some Alpe in France after overcooking one of the hairpin turns.  Otherwise, what the fuck are you doing off the bike?

    For track-bike riding hipsters?  Who cares?

  • If we're talking about shouldering bikes and bunny hoping, we still have to ask, "Is Joey ok?"

  • Ah Joey, I've missed you.  Glad you are still OK.

    Saddest sight in quite awhile - I did RAGBRAI because some friends needed someone to take over a spot.  We added a ride the day before, so I had eight days of nothing to do but ride my bike. Great route and riding but the rest of the "experience" just started annoying me.

    Anyway, the route is a state highway shut down both ways.  No motor traffic except the very rare instance of locals going to their farm.  This also means no motorcycle cops, no sag wagons, no team buses, nothing.  The sag vehicles only sweep at the back when the road is being opened back up.  This means that if you can't fix an issue on the road, you are screwed. Several times I would crest a hill to see someone with their bike on their shoulder slowly walking to the next town to then sit and wait for the sag vehicles, and sometimes that town would be 10 miles away through rolling hills.

    I was blessed with no flats, mechanicals, or issues of any kind.  Probably means I'll have 5 flats this weekend.

  • @The Oracle

    For cyclocross?  Absolutely.

    For mountain biking?  Yes, if you survive the crash down the mountainside, and if the geometry of the frame allows (mine does not).

    For road cycling?  The only time you should be carrying your bike on your shoulder is if you lauch off the road on the descent of some Alpe in France after overcooking one of the hairpin turns.  Otherwise, what the fuck are you doing off the bike?

    For track-bike riding hipsters?  Who cares?

    word

    For me, since i have not indulged myself in Cross yet...but will in a month or so, it will be the shoulder....probably cause I will be so slow i will undoubtedly have the time to shoulder it with ever obstacle

  • We used to barrel thru U-jumps (6ft deep) on cyclo cross bikes, that came to crawling over the opposite side with almost all speed lost. We charged forward riding like mad men. I usually carry the road bike thru the front door of the house.

  • It's only August 10.  Summer is still in full swing.  Why are we talking about cyclocross?

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