The Rides

The Ride. It is the cathedral of our sport, where we worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. It is the end to our means. Indeed, The Bike may be the central tool to our sport, but to turn the pedals is to experience the sensation of freedom, of flight. It is all for The Ride.

The world is overflowing with small, twisty roads that capture our collective imagination as cyclists. We spend our lifetimes searching out the best routes and rides; we pore over maps, we share with our fellow disciples, we talk to non-cycling locals all in pursuit of the Perfect Ride.

The Rides is devoted entirely to the best routes and rides around the world. Some are races or cyclosportives, others feature in the Classics and stages of The Great Races, while others still are little-known gems, discovered through careful meditation on The V. Be warned: these rides are not your average Sunday Afternoon spin; these rides are the best and most difficult rides in the word – they represent the rites of passage into La Vie Velominatus. It is to be taken for granted that these rides require loads of Rule #5, many of them Rule #10, and all of them are best enjoyed in Rule #9 conditions. They have been shared by you, the community. The Rides also features articles devoted to the greatest rides and providess a forum for sharing other rides for discussion.

If you’d like to submit a ride or an article about your own favorite ride, please feel free to send it to us and we’ll do our best to work with you to include it.

[rideitem status=”public” title=”Haleakala” distance=”56km” category=”Grimpeur” url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/50412514″ location=”Paia, Maui, Hawaii, USA”]

haleakala

Haleakala is simultaneously the longest paved continuous climb in the world as well as the shortest ascent from sea level to 10,000 feet in the world. Though not terribly steep, this is a long, grinding climb that will reduce a strong rider to a whimpering lump.

To put the effort in perspective, this climb is 60km long a an average of 6% with two pitches as steep as 17%. That translates to somewhere between 3 or more hours of nonstop climbing, usually in Maui’s direct heat and often into a whipping headwind that spins around into a headwind no matter which direction the switchbacks take you.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem statuc=public title=”Liege-Bastogne-Liege” distance=”265″ category=”Rouleur” url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/58053308/” location=”Liege, Belgium”]

lbl

Liege-Bastogne-Liege is not only La Doyenne, the oldest of the Classics, but also represents perhaps the most demanding course in cycling. The 280 km, 3000m vertical route starts with an easy ride out from Liege to Bastogne which lulls riders into a false sense of security; the hills are frequent, but none of them terribly demanding. Into Bastogne, and the story changes on the way back to Liege with 9 categorized climbs in the second half, including the fearsome Côte de la Redoute and the Côte de Saint-Nicolas.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem status=public title=”Paris-Roubaix” category=”Hardman” distance=”265″ url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/58052610/” location=”Compiégne, France” guideurl=”http://www.cyclingpave.cc/” guide=”Pavé Cycling Classics”]

paris-roubaix

L’enfur du Nord. The Hell of The North. The Queen of the Classics. This isn’t a ride over the stones from your local brick-paved roads. You think climbs are what make a ride tough? We’ve got news for you: this is the hardest ride on the planet and it boasts a maximum elevation of 55 meters. These are vicious, brutal stones; the kind that will stretch each kilometer to their full length, the kind of stones that you will feel long after the rattling of the bars has stopped. These stones will change you. Forever.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem status=public title=”Mortirolo/Gavia Loop” category=”Grimpeur” distance=”115km” url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/59027020/” location=”Bormio, Italy” contributor=”Joe”]

The Mortirolo is perhaps the most feared pass in Western Europe, and the Gavia the most storied. Given their proximity to each other, its a wonder why this isn’t the most talked-about ride in Italy. Maybe it is; its impossible to say without being Italian. The loop nature of this ride makes it feasible as a solo escapade, but any ride with the kind of stats this one bears – 3200 meters ascended in 115 kilometers including the viscously steep Mortirolo – is best enjoyed with a riding partner or support car.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem status=public title=”200 on 100″ category=”Grimpeur” distance=”330km” url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/58052808/” location=”Vernon, VT” contributor=”cdelinks” contributorurl=”http://cyclowhat.com”]

“Dumptruck of Awesome” has become the catch-phrase associated with this brutally hard, yet strikingly beautiful 330 kilometer (200 mile) ride down Vermont Route 100.  This ride was made popular during the summer of 2011 when Ted King, Tim Johnson, and a local amateur cyclist, Ryan Kelly, documented this ride on film. The ride starts on the Canadian border and finishes on the Massachusetts border.  With over 2500 meters of climbing on this 330 kilometer ride, you will need to pack a few lunches to get through this one.  Do this ride in the Fall, and the foliage might be beautiful enough to distract you from the horrible pain you will most certainly suffer.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem status=”public” title=”De Ronde Van West Portlandia” distance=”76km” category=”Grimpeur” url=”http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/15276210″ location=”Portland, Oregon, USA”]

A ride that officially “never happens” each spring, this 76 km route charts a course through Portland’s West Hills, paying homage to the European Spring Classics. Approximately 1,800 meters of paved and unpaved climbs are spread throughout the course, with several sections reaching grades of over 20%. More information can be found at Ronde PDX.

[/rideitem]

[rideitem status=public title=”Seattle Master Urban Ride” category=”Rouleur” distance=”130km” url=http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/57732282 location=”Seattle, Washington, USA”]

seattleronde

This is perhaps the most challenging urban route in Seattle, hitting three of the big hills that define Seattle’s topography. The route starts and ends on Phinney Ridge, but hits the climbs of Interlaken and Alder Street/Lake Dell Drive on its way to Mercer Island, before coming back to hit Queen Anne and Magnolia, weaving its way up each of these hills as many times as possible via the steepest route available before the finale to the north via Golden Gardens, Blue Ridge Drive, and Carkeek Park. Panoramic views of the Cascades, Mount Rainier, Mount Baker, The Olympic Penninsula and Puget Sound makes this a standout Urban ride.

[/rideitem]

3,329 Replies to “The Rides”

  1. Ya know fellas. We could organize a Cogal in the same area with the same route. We could also invite/convince Hincapie to ride with us as well. No reason that he would refuse?

  2. @Buck Rogers

    @graham d.m.

    @DerHoggz

    I’m tempted to ride in this snoreastercane, any thoughts?

    Did you go for it? My concern would’ve been getting blown off the road!

    I, personally, whimped out. 50+ mph gusts and rain were just a bit too much for me. I rode the trainer in the basement instead. Merckx forgive me.

    Me too, my friend. It wasn’t as bad in New Hampshire as further south , but I saw the blowing and debris and rode the trainer.

  3. Pretty awesome end to what was otherwise a pretty stock standard morning ride yesterday. Was enjoying a post ride/pre work espresso with the owner of the cafe that will be starting point for the Adelaide cogal next January & chatting to the guys he’d been out riding with before opening.

    While we’re sitting around comparing tales of our latest exploits another rider rolls up & Walter (the owner) just looks over his shoulder & says ‘hey Rach’ in perfect casually deliberate form as we all look around to see Rachel Neylan stepping off her bike to join us for a coffee before heading out for her first training ride for the day. Nice to start the day chatting to a very cool chick whose most recent exploits just happen to be coming 2nd in World Championships.

  4. @freddy

    This being the off-season and all. I think Rule #50 could be put on hiatus for one month. No fucking around come December 1st. Personally it would take me more than a month to grow something visually offensive or just visible.

  5. Thank you, now i have a real reason to grow a chopper for Movember, instead of a classic.

    I asked about this a while back, and it was suggested that a classic moustache can be had if one wears nothing but vintage wool while riding an old steel frame.

  6. @Buck Rogers

    @graham d.m.

    @DerHoggz

    I’m tempted to ride in this snoreastercane, any thoughts?

    Did you go for it? My concern would’ve been getting blown off the road!

    I, personally, whimped out. 50+ mph gusts and rain were just a bit too much for me. I rode the trainer in the basement instead. Merckx forgive me.

    Tuesdays give me the entire afternoon as opposed to Modays, so that is when I usually ride, and that is when it was forecasted to be strongest although we were more on the periphery.  Monday night it was really pouring and windy, so I was getting pretty stoked.  Sadly Tuesday it was pretty mellow, just cold and light rain.  I rode, but wasn’t as Rule #9 as I was hoping for.

  7. @mxlmax

    Here’s Cadel Breaking the Law (Rules).

    And a cue sheet.

    If you are referring to the arm warmers, pushing them down while climbing is acceptable.  Although looking closer those are tights or leg warmers, which are in violation of looking Pro/Fantastic?

  8. @Mikael Liddy

    Pretty awesome end to what was otherwise a pretty stock standard morning ride yesterday. Was enjoying a post ride/pre work espresso with the owner of the cafe that will be starting point for the Adelaide Cogal next January & chatting to the guys he’d been out riding with before opening.

    While we’re sitting around comparing tales of our latest exploits another rider rolls up & Walter (the owner) just looks over his shoulder & says ‘hey Rach’ in perfect Casually Deliberate form as we all look around to see Rachel Neylan stepping off her bike to join us for a coffee before heading out for her first training ride for the day. Nice to start the day chatting to a very cool chick whose most recent exploits just happen to be coming 2nd in World Championships.

    Damn you Liddy.

    That’s just too awesome for words.

  9. @mouse should this be when I toss in the fact that she’ll joining her SASI training partner Annette Edmonson on the “Amy’s Ride” this Sunday (along with Annette’s brother Alex & paralympian Keiran Modra) & auctioning a signed national team jersey at the finish?

    Unfortunately with the number of doctors & lawyers that’ll be riding whose wallets are nearly as fat as their Sprinter’s Muscles I don’t think I’m much chance of winning the auction unless they draw it about 3hrs early!

  10. Some funny shit in here I’ve seen before, but a bunch I hadn’t. especially the last bit where dude gets chucked off a bridge. And near the beginning, who are the two trying to beat the shit out of each other in cycling shoes (which I’d imagine doesn’t work well for fist-a-cuffs).

    http://youtu.be/zF3kAoLusAg

  11. A couple rare days each fall, you get a day like today. Threatening rain, but doesn’t (after like a meter of it’s fallen in the last 4-5 weeks), and it’s around 60f. It was good to get out with the boys for a few hours.

  12. Faaark that was tough! Was hoping to stretch it out to 200k’s but with a 33 degree average temp & head/cross winds for the last 100k’s I had to bail for ‘easier’ route home…

  13. @scaler911

    Fuck it I’m in London and it is pissing down.

    I have an hour until I have to go out if I’m going on the club ride (if there is one).

    I don’t mind so much if it rains once I’m out but leaving the house in heavy rain is not good. Not when I’m already cold just sitting inside in my jim jams.

  14. @Marcus

    @freddy @Gianni
    Given Ronnie Johns’ close relationship with Rule #5, and the fact that Movember started in Australia, there is only one choice for mo-inclined Velominate, the Chopper.

    Imitators

    Once again a MASSIVE NO FUCKING WAY that Movember started in Aus. The fancy schmancy fucking foo foo website with neat little videos on how to grow a mustache was started by a bunch of poofs from Melbourne – Movember had existed as an informal fundraiser for charity long before that. I remember thinking that it was typical fucking Aussie behavior to hijack a good idea and claim that they started it at the time.

  15. @ChrisO

    @scaler911

    Fuck it I’m in London and it is pissing down.

    I have an hour until I have to go out if I’m going on the club ride (if there is one).

    I don’t mind so much if it rains once I’m out but leaving the house in heavy rain is not good. Not when I’m already cold just sitting inside in my jim jams.

    Its been chucking it for hours in winchester and bearing mind the prevailing winds are normally westerly, I don’t hold out much hope for you….just smile and Rule #9 it is about all you can do…

  16. @Mikael Liddy

    @Deakus @scaler911 @ChrisO safe to say conditions were a little different down here today…

    To make matters worse it has stopped here now which means it will probably stop in London just about the time @ChrisO finishes his chaingang ride!

  17. @Deakus ouch! To be honest it was a little hotter than I’d hoped today…took a lot of sting out of the legs towards the end.

  18. Well that was unpleasant – after two hours even shifting had become a challenge, owing to loss of feeling.

    I am however ashamed, on behalf of Dulwich Paragon Cycling Club, to say that none of them turned up for the Sunday clubrun. There I was at the meeting point, ready to roll, and the only cyclists in the cafe were neither from the club nor looking like they were about to go out.

    I would offer that as proof of the Rule #9 conditions but clearly they should put a warning  on the club website that it is purely for little girls. It would make the Baby Jens cry.

  19. @ChrisO

    Well that was unpleasant – after two hours even shifting had become a challenge, owing to loss of feeling.

    I am however ashamed, on behalf of Dulwich Paragon Cycling Club, to say that none of them turned up for the Sunday clubrun. There I was at the meeting point, ready to roll, and the only cyclists in the cafe were neither from the club nor looking like they were about to go out.

    I would offer that as proof of the Rule #9 conditions but clearly they should put a warning on the club website that it is purely for little girls. It would make the Baby Jens cry.

    Chapeau…it was pretty heavy here…I guess it is now about to stop and probably brighten up for the afternoon!

  20. @ChrisO

    I know the feeling, when you have to look at your hands to see which lever it is about to hit, and if it even will.

  21. And can I just add, Blessings of Merckx be upon my beloved Velomissus.

    As I crawled through the front door like the last survivor of an Antarctic expedition she immediately sent me upstairs to stand under a hot shower, where she brought me a cup of tea with two sugars, and then made baked potato with beans and cheese for lunch.

  22. @ChrisO

    And can I just add, Blessings of Merckx be upon my beloved Velomissus.

    As I crawled through the front door like the last survivor of an Antarctic expedition she immediately sent me upstairs to stand under a hot shower, where she brought me a cup of tea with two sugars, and then made baked Potato with beans and cheese for lunch.

    What a Gal!  I think you should fetch her slippers and hop related beverage so she can settle down for the evening…

  23. @ChrisO A nice change from the desert!  It was pretty filthy round our neck of the woods but I think eight or nine people turned up for the club run. Some may not have been seen since though. For once I thought taking the boys to their rugby matches would be the safer option but after ten minutes on the side lines I was completely soaked and would much rather have been pedalling to keep some traces of warmth.

    Went out later in the afternoon, it had cleared up a bit but there was so much surface water that by the time my front tub punctured a mile into the ride I was soaked through. I’m afraid to say that at that point I said fuck it and gingerly made my way home – the tyre held enough CO2 to get me back and I didn’t really want to be messing around with pitstop if I could get a proper repair done later.

  24. Here’s a wee youtube of a ride I did yesterday.  It’s the first part of a longer ride I like to think of as “My Personal Koppenberg”.  I had planned on doing the whole ride, but frankly, I was knackered, and my wife called and said lets go to teh beach, so I cut it short.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qg7egNb5mjw

  25. @Ken Ho only got to watch the first minute or so (work seem to frown upon my watching cycling videos while ‘working’) but looks good. Is that done with the chest mount?

  26. @Mikael Liddy

    No, I used a Flymount, mounted directly to the bars.  I used a chest mount for the NIghtcap Range one I have up, but it points down too much.  Chest mount is definitely more stable, but hard to get a good angle while on a bike.  Really good for ski-ing though.

  27. @Ken Ho

    BTW, can someone embed that properly for me, please ? I’m a Luddite.

    If you want to embed youtube video on to the forum:

    1.  Go to youtube and under the video you want to embed click SHARE

    2.  Then click EMBED and copy the long string of text that comes up highlighted.

    3.  Click EMBED VIDEO on this forum i.e. just above where you type your text responses to posts and paste the text you have copied in to the box.

    4.  Wait for a few seconds and the video will upload…..VOILA!

  28. @mouse Now THAT is awesome!  Look at the focus and position on the bike.  Regular little Tommeke you have there!  Just needs to be chucking the bidon and he’d be on the cover of cyclesport!

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