The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path, not the end. In pursuit of La Vie Velominatus, we know of no end to the Path; each of us journey through an endless evolution of understanding and reverence. As such, The Word continues to be handed down from high upon Mount Velominis and The Rules continue to be expanded upon. Today we present you with two new Rules, in addition to the announcement of the first two Rules Book Signing Events.
The Rules will be released in the United States on May 5, known as Die Congnoscentus or V.V in old Velomiskrit. In support of its impending launch, we’re very excited to announce the first of our book signing events. The first will be in New York City’s flagship store on Saturday, May 3rd; the second will be held in Rapha’s store in San Francisco on Saturday, May 10. Both events will start with a ride leaving the Rapha store at 8:30am, returning around 2:30pm. The signing will take place in the respective Rapha store starting at 3:00pm. See the respective event pages for the NY Rapha Event and the SFO Rapha Event.
We took the opportunity to correct some issues and improve the quality of the photographs with respect to the UK version that came out last June. That’s not to say we fixed all the errors and didn’t introduce new ones; as long as I’m involved in any project you can be sure there will be problems. But in addition to being refreshed, we also gave the Prologue a facelift and Greg LeMond – the only American Tour de France winner – graciously wrote the Foreword. The US Release also contains four Rules which were not included in the UK release; two of them appeared on the site as they were divined, but the other two were reserved for the release of the book.
Rule #94 // Use the correct tool for the job, and use the tool correctly.
Bicycle maintenance is an art; tools are designed to serve specific purposes, and it is essential that the Velominatus learns to use each tool properly when working on their loyal machine.
For anyone who has ever tried to do something as simple as cut a brake cable or install a headset, this one doesn’t really need much explanation. Without the proper tools, you will certainly massacre the part and likely deface the bicycle itself. At worst, you will cause irreparable harm. The tools and learning to use them is as much a part of La Vie Velominatus as riding itself.
Rule #95 // Never lift your bike over your head.
Under no circumstances is it acceptable to raise one’s machine above your head. The only exception is when placing it onto a car’s roof-rack.
None of the Keepers understand why people are lifting their bikes over their heads. A road bicycle is meant to leave the ground as much as a Cyclist is meant to walk. It is an unholy thing and this behavior must come to a stop immediately.
For a full explanation on the origins and justification of these Rules, I suppose you will have to consult the latest release of the book or join us in New York or San Francisco.
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I'm really confused at the moment. I have in my possession a copy of The Rules, first American Edition 2014, in hardback...yet you say that it's release date is V.V. How can this be? Was there a colossal foul-up at my particular book store...or was it perhaps divine intervention that the prophet bestowed I should be able to find a copy 2 weeks early?
As this thread is likely to attract the attention of our many Velomericans it seems a good place to ask... is anyone in Los Angeles?
I have most of a day to kill there in June (Friday the 13th as it happens). Attending a conference at a hotel in Beverly Hills which finishes Thurs afternoon but I have to wait until Friday afternoon for a flight so I'm looking for something to do, possibly involving bicycles.
Alternatively I'm open to any other suggestions about what to do, not being particularly inclined to give a shit about celebrities, film-stars and so on.
I did look to see if there was a baseball game but the Dodgers are on the road on Thursday unfortunately. And so far no porn studios have responded to my emails.
@ChrisO non bike: go to the Getty Museum.
All Hail Rule #94!! As a lifelong member of the Brotherhood of the Wrench I have seen many,many acts of tomfoolery enacted upon poor unsuspecting bicycles by people having no idea how to properly wield tools.
If you don't know how to fix it..IT'S OKAY..we are happy to fix it for you!
@Stephen
Mother jumper! How is it you have a copy before I do? This did happen in England too; book shops seemed to have the book well before the British release date and they sold them also.
@Gianni there is a certain online vendor that has it for sale right now also.
@RedRanger
That would be too easy. Better to fly from Hawaii to NYC (and back) in hopes the publisher slips me a free one.
@Nate
Mmm, yes that looks good, thanks for the tip.
I figured Friday wouldn't be the ideal day to join a group ride anyway, apart from the issues of getting hold of a bike.
Ah come on, who hasn't wrapped one side of a chain around a broom handle, the other round the cassette, wedged broom handle in door frame, held wheel tight and braced with feet against door frame...
Yeah OK I bought a chain-whip shortly after.
Chapeau, chaps on US publication date. First edition was a cracking book, and sounds like this will carry on where that left off.
Love the V. V publication date... Day after Star Wars Day (May the Fourth be with you - boom).
Celebrity book signings; link ups with Rapha cafés on both coasts; foreword from Greg LeMond: where did it all go so wrong?