Photo: Jim Fryer / BrakeThrough Media | brakethroughmedia.com
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This festering blight on the Cycling landscape seemed to start with cross-country mountain bikers, who often finish their race alone and have time to stop at the finish line, look around to see if there are any spectators in attendance, then bend over like a shaved praying mantis to struggle with the 7 kilogram heft of their carbon hardtail, holding it aloft for the mandatory three seconds until their imaginary judges give the green light to drop it back to earth…Should you be neck deep in a river or for some reason need to throw your bike over a prison wall, exceptions can be made -Brett Kennedy. The Rules
Exceptions can be made as Brett points out, and how could one end up in prison with one’s bike?
Far be it from us to criticize Fabian Cancellara’s Strade Bianche antics. Doesn’t he read The Rules? He would have had to read all the way to page 228 to get to this gem and admittedly, he is a busy man.
Well if Fabian can do it, I can do it. That is how the trouble begins. Tim Wellens couldn’t resist. He had a solo victory and time to kill and maybe deep in every professional’s contract there is a clause that says one is paid 10,000 euros for raising your bike over your head. But damn it, professionals are supposed to act like professionals or every school yard kid will be trying it. And then where will we be?
If you want to hold your bike over your head, you can; find a deep river to ford or when being incarcerated, bring your bike.
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Thank goodness he didn't pull a wheelie or stick a baby pacifier in his mouth.
For pure class on how to cross the finish line in first place you can't find better examples than Lance Armstrong.
THE Gorilla should have lifted the 2nd place rider over his head and thrown him back. That we would applaud!
I wondered if this was going to be mentioned. aside from shoving his saddle up his arse while riding, I've enjoyed watching the kid but hopefully, Greipel and Hanson gave him a bunch of shit for that one.
@GoldenGorilla
Drop the second place guy on his bended knee...ouch. The Gorilla looks like he could lift a human over his head actually.
@Teocalli
Indeed, bikes too heavy. I hefted an 1980s De Rosa frame recently, fucking heavy as hell, we forget what steel frames used to be.
@Scott
The whole point is to look fantastic regardless of what you've won. Wellens undid all his soul crushing by looking douche-tastic. I hope the Lotto boys gave him a ration of shit on the bus (probably not though since it is a payday for them regardless of his transgressions).
@hudson
Actually, it might be pretty funny to see a domestique dump what's left in his bidon over the helmet of the winner he pulled most of the way up the mountain..
@Danimal
Or better still, the winner baptizing the runner-up... "I beat you, and with 500ml of superfluous weight - suck it."
I have to admit I enjoyed both celebrations, perhaps Rosa's more as his was a real Rule #9 ride, I like the genuine sense of joy at achieving what is so very difficult to do, I can understand how it might get old for some regular winners, COTHO always looked a little defeated to me, maybe if you know you cheated, you will never know if it was you or the drugs that won, which is why he always looked a little sour on it.
Nothing like the look of pure joy that comes from a great Solo win.
Diego Rosa
http://www.steephill.tv/players/eitb/?title=Best+Victory+Celebration+of+the+Year%2C+Stage+5+Finish&dashboard=vuelta-al-pais-vasco&id=3972330&yr=2016#.VzaYpKjrNmU.facebook