La Vie Velominatus: The Gifts of Rule #9

An early morning ride on Keepers Tour 2013. Photo: Brett Kennedy

We’re not really supposed to have favorites, but everyone does. Just ask your parents. So while I’m not supposed to have a favorite, I do, and its Rule #9.

Bad weather immediately separates the wheat from the chaff, and so the weekend warriors stay indoors and leave the roads to the devout. I talk most often about riding in the rain, with the drops of water dripping from my cap acting as my personal metronome as I carve a path through the chaos towards a happier self. But sunny days in the cold can provide their own glorious solitude.

On Keepers Tour 2013, we had unseasonably cold weather, and some of the best rides we had were early morning spins before heading off to the races. With the sun hanging low over the horizon, we rode through our frozen breath, together in close formation yet each of us retreating inward as we steeled ourselves against the cold. These were beautiful, peaceful rides.

This winter in Seattle has been relatively dry, but also cold. On the weekends, the country roads are nearly deserted and all that is left is the silent, still air and the burning of cold air as it enters my lungs. On a recent solo ride on Whidbey Island, I spun down the same roads which only a few months earlier I had ridden with friends on the annual Whidbey Island Cogal. The island seems a full place then, now it looked like an entirely different place – empty and beautiful.

There is something about the way the bike handles in the cold. The tires are firmer, the rubber less supple. The connection between bicycle and road seems simultaneously harsher and more fragile than in the warm. The muscles in my arms and hands are also more twitchy in the cold. Not twitchy like I can suddenly sprint; twitchy like I have difficulty controlling what they are doing – where normally I pride myself on holding a clean line, in the cold a small bump in the road might trigger a spasm that sends the bike into a wobble. Its an exciting way to ride.

Quiet roads, a still harbor, an early morning sunrise; these are the gifts reserved for those who ventured out when others stay in. These are the gifts of Rule #9.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @ChrisO

    Some mudguards just don't work but many do. Since most of your riding takes place in a desert and most of mine in a damp swamp I'll assume greater knowledge on this occasion.

    My number one doesn't have mudguards though and still gets used for rides like the one you missed the other day.

    RP was rammed this weekend. There were as many runners as cyclists many of whom were on the road! I think it's time to start heading for the hills. I prefer my rides to be a bit more solitary.

  • @PedallingTom   If you want to hook up down in leafy Surrey let me know - though I am away "altitude training" for 2 and a half weeks from tomorrow.  Though at the moment the leaves are mostly that treacherous mash on the roads.

  • Can I suggest an addition to Rule #24? Speeds and distances shall be referred to and measured in kilometres and temperatures shall be referred to in Celcius.

    Just so when we talk about riding in the low 30s we are all on the same page. I would't want some poor confused soul going for a ride in a blizzard while wearing Froome's new skinsuit.

     

  • @eenies

    Can I suggest an addition to Rule #24? Speeds and distances shall be referred to and measured in kilometres and temperatures shall be referred to in Celcius.

    Just so when we talk about riding in the low 30s we are all on the same page. I would't want some poor confused soul going for a ride in a blizzard while wearing Froome's new skinsuit.

    I dunno might be a good Darwin selection for anyone who actually buys one of those horror nets if they come on the open market!

  • @Teocalli

    Some sorties to leafy Surrey would suit me. Give me a shout when you get back from your altitude training!

    @eenies

    Good idea re temperatures and we should stay metric on all but alcohol measures. But please can everyone stop conjuring images of Froome in that dreadful skinsuit.

  • @PedallingTom

    @ChrisO

    Some mudguards just don't work but many do. Since most of your riding takes place in a desert and most of mine in a damp swamp I'll assume greater knowledge on this occasion.

    My number one doesn't have mudguards though and still gets used for rides like the one you missed the other day.

    RP was rammed this weekend. There were as many runners as cyclists many of whom were on the road! I think it's time to start heading for the hills. I prefer my rides to be a bit more solitary.

    Most of my current riding, yes, but my pre-desert riding was mostly audax so I have a deep and secret past with SPDs, Open Pros and mudguards which also have flaps attached - now those actually do work.

    I also went over to RP on Sunday, but was with the family so didn't try to organise anything.

    It was indeed heaving with people who don't look before they pull out to slowly overtake the person in front going marginally slower than them, as well as tits who push up those little rises and then slump and coast at the top as if they've just crested the Madeleine. I got very annoyed and instead of doing the nice steady ride I had planned hammered out a couple of fast laps. At least I didn't have any spray in my face !

    May go back on Sunday, weather and family dependent. I'm racing in Brighton on Saturday so it also depends on how many brownie points I have left. Persuading my wife the dog needs a change of scenery seems to be an effective tactic at the moment.

  • @Erik

    Not saying I am riding in -5 degree F weather, but if I was, would there be a lexicon entry for that?

    Lost Beyond All Reason

  • @frank

    @teleguy57

    @wiscot

    It's been a tad chilly here in WI the past few days. Got the first ride of the year in on Saturday - a cold, damp, windy 28 degrees. Needless to say I saw no other riders. Today was a Rule #9 for the books: with an outside windchill of around -40 degrees or so, I headed for the garage and the trainer. Merckx knows what the temp in there was but I could see my breath as clear as day. I'm thinking it was in the teens. Even with tights, jacket, gloves and a hat I got warm but not hot. It might not truly qualify for Rule #9, but in my book it does. Going outside was not an option, no matter how loud Rule #5 might be ringing in my ears.

    Supposed to be low 30s by the weekend. THAT'S riding weather!

    Amen, brother. Being a few miles north of you similar weather. Thu 2 Jan did some evening ski patrol training at the local hill west of Oshkosh at -7F. Today was 4F in my garage this a.m. so I'm in the basement on my rollers.

    Got outside Saturday 4 Jan as you did, and had the roads to myself. I took advantage of new pre-owned winter shoes and the great Showers Pass softshell trainer Santa left under my tree for a comfy 90 minutes. I felt quite proud of myself for picking the right day for my first 2014 outdoor ride...

    You kids. In my Minnesota ski racing days, I'd happily line up for a start in -10F wearing a spandex leotard with nothing for protection but some mole skin on my cheeks and a Peter-Heater down where it matters.

    And, because I was a superstitious bastard, I'd always race in my thin gloves. If you get cold, just go harder.

    Ah, but you were racing, not just riding. I've raced in near freezing temps in little more than a skinsuit and some overshoes with snow and slush on the roads. Horses for courses etc, etc.

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