On Rule #41: Garbage Collectors
[rule number=41/]
Look, people. We’re not making this up; we’re mainlining this shit straight from the rivers of Truth flowing down the slopes of Mount Velomis. They draw from the history and culture of the sport, and from good common sense. They make sense, in fact, even if the Keepers don’t necessarily know why at the time of conjuring. Nevertheless, they apply to the weekend warrior as much as they do to a Tour de France Champion.
Television commentators waxed poetic about the garbage bag caught on Froome’s back wheel being symbolic of how this race has thrown everything at him and still he persevered. Well, I’m here to tell you that his litter collection was little more than civic service and had nothing to do with bad luck: it was penance paid for a blatant violation of Rule #41. Full stop.
Obey the Rules and this sort of shit won’t happen.
@piwakawaka
Or Pinot’s
@Mike C
Sort of like Race Across America meets Ironman Triathlon bike leg? I can’t wait. Much.
@frank
For the record I am a Texan living in Ireland – so not gushing over the brits but have to hand it to Brailsford.
@piwakawaka
@Teocalli
I was going to say that, surely Pinot was even quicker.
The way the French media treated Froome over those 2 weeks was pretty disgraceful. Don’t know what their problem is, they seemed to quite like Wiggins.
@Barracuda
No doubt Guimard and Le Blaireau just look the business and had loads of success with a clever, innovative approach and a healthy dollop of panache. Brailsford and Froome look totally nerdy in comparison. Too early to compare Brailsford to Guimard and forget about comparing anyone today to Le Blaireau.
All that said Sky / Froome delivered in V Fashion in 3 out of the last 4 tours and until proven otherwise with a totally clean team. When Hinault went to La Vie Claire they were all about the modern look and gadgets, scientific training etc. like Sky is today. They introduced targeted training with heart rate monitors and the Badger found the whole approach a revelation after being sick of getting ordered around by Guimard all the time with Renault.
Brailsford and Froome are just dorky yes – but everyone is copying Sky’s formula now, including the French Cycling Federation! So if Brailsford is not the new Guimard then who is?
@RobSandy
Quintana was mowing Pinot down, so that would make Pinot slower.
@Oli
Yes, good point.
I stand corrected, said the man in the orthopaedic shoes.
Hinault and Guimard were a killer combo in their day. Froome and Brailsford are a killer combo right now, but the sport has changed so much in the 30+ years that separates those photos that the comparison is unfair. Froome is very good, but he’s no Hinault in any way, shape or form.
Froome handled himself very well – the abuse from fans and media was/is unwarranted. This wasn’t his first rodeo – one tour in the bag already, a 2nd in the Vuelta in 2011 (which he should have won but didn’t as he was working for Wiggo and could/should have beaten Cobo (where’s he now FFS?), and a 2nd in the Tour in 2012 to Wiggins. So let’s recap, if CF had been given free reign over the past 4 years, we could be looking at a 3 time Tour champ and one-time Vuelta winner. He’s been tested and tested and tested and not on scintilla of impropriety.
Yeah, Sky have good gear, but the proper cycling cap Froomie wears looks shit. They need to contact whomever does the Etixx caps.
@wiscot
I think Froome would look odd in any cycling cap or hat. He’s got an odd shaped head.
@Jim
See, the thing is, my forks won’t allow the correct application of #41, so do I buy a new bike?
Or, by NOT buying a new bike, am I in direct contravention of #12?
Am I proper fucked either way?
@wiscot
I’m getting tired of the notion that Froom could’ve/would’ve/should’ve won the 2012 Tour. He didn’t. Because not only did Team Sky think Bradley Wiggins was the stronger rider, Bradley himself showed that in each ITT.
Did Froome show he was faster at certain points in the race? He did. Big deal. Froome wasn’t the strongest every leg in the 2015 Tour either. Yet he was the strongest rider overall and he deservedly won. As did Wiggins in 2012.
@markb
@frank
Hold on, don’t we all agree on this site that Pharmstrong never won the Tour?
Guimard vs Brailsford be done
Passed today, another great DS
@nobby
Yes I confirm you are fucked! (obvious-man at work again)….
I see your Brailsford and raise you a Raphael Geminiani. Not one for the “marginal gains” school. More of the “big bloody chunks” ecole.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rapha%C3%ABl_G%C3%A9miniani
@Mike C
No.
@wiscot
Exactly, it won’t be soon that they design another Tour like this, although it was the best one for ages.
I loved Nibbles’ fight and that’s why I love him so much (and am so disappointed he’s at Astana – the only redeeming note from that is that obviously he and Vino hate each other). His flat on l’Alpe was such horrible luck.
Piti is such a problem for so many reasons, but the man looks beautiful on a bike and can lay down some power. I find myself inexplicably rooting for him, like when he attacked Finger Guns on the stage Cummings won.
I’m quite in love with South Africa; if I was going to move away from Seattle it would be Cape Town. Massive props to that team for sure, although they could stand to have a prettier kit and I’d love it if they did a more classic National Champion’s jersey.
Indeed – Pino stepped up a few rungs in my estimation – and another rider who looks beautiful on a bike. Now if he’d just switch to a team that used black shorts.
Fuck yeah.
@Paul
No, we just agree he’s a cunt.
@wiscot
Finally at the end you’re making some real sense!
@Barracuda
Oh, come the fuck on; where’s your sense of humor? I’m just saying lets have some reverence for the legends of our sport before we go making these sorts of comparisons.
But more to the point, the contrast between the photos is hilarious. The top photo with the shirtless Guimard and a fucking thumbs-upping Hinault is just so classically rad in the most horrible way that I can’t help but love the fuck out of it.
@frank
Thank fuck you got it!
@frank @ped Im stuck in an office 10 hours a day, my sense of humour has had a by-pass for the last few weeks.
I assure you I’ll be back to my sarcastic self in no time. Point taken
@Matt
I was hoping that photo would show up
@ped
Its a full on Clinton thumbs up, too!
@1860
Aww Gawd Damn it!!!!
@frank
Its just nice to see a picture of The Badger smiling. Im so used to seeing him mashing the cranks with a ‘Fuck The Peloton’ look on his lowered angry brow
No wonder Rober Millar was terrified of him
@nobby
What’s also cool is that the Hinault/Guimard pic was taken during the Giro (in 1980 I think) as he was crushing his rivals to win his first Giro. (He’d have won the Tour too if it hadn’t been for a knee injury). It was the Giro where Hinault and Bernaudeau won the race with some fine tactical riding over the Stelvio on stage 20 that put Hinault in pink. This pic says “we have it in the bag!”
Contrast Hinault’s arms and those of Froome. If you’re a striking worker, who are you going to be scared of getting punched by?
@nobby
Looking for a photo of Hinault and Millar together I cam across this. WANT.
OM-fucking-G, that gives me such a trouser tickle. Lemond’s OAKLEY’S are just everything to me.