The boys discussing #43.
I wonder if Rule #43 should be sublimated on our bibs too. It might be my most favorite Rule. Don’t be a jackass. But if you absolutely must be a jackass, be a funny jackass. Always remember, we’re all brothers and sisters on the road.
As a Keeper on the Velominati site, it irritates me that the Velominati are known mostly for The Rules. While we didn’t invent them nor were we the first to list them, our proselytizing has made us synonymous with The Rules. I would hate for us to be known as the exclusive Cyclists rather than the funny Cyclists.
Frank started this site to write about and discuss the beauty of cycling; The Rules were never part of the plan. If someone wants to start something Rules-wise with me, they better hand me the list because I don’t know them. I might possibly have been a more religious person if it all weren’t so deadly serious. And yes, my inability to take things seriously has been brought up too often, usually at annual performance reviews. But I grew up with the daily option of nuclear annihilation hanging over my head. Us kids all started to talk like French philosophers, at eight years old, smoking cigarettes and asking, mon dieu, what iz ze point of life, eh? Our local cub scout pack just fell apart after a few months… really, earning patches to sew on our uniforms? It made no sense to us young nihilists. Zere is no patch for digging an impromptu bomb shelter? Ahh, fuck it, let’s go out into the woods and smoke more cigarettes.
While I occasionally worry about The Rules smothering all other things Velominati, that worry is always quickly buried by the funny back and forth on the site. While some cycling sites are heavily moderated or troll filled, Velominati seems to thrive on the uncensored winding up. We realize arguing about riding one’s bike could make us all seem like jackasses, but at least we are funny jackasses. Long live Rule #43.
And to prove my point, if I had one… this.
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I find a lot of similarities between the Velominatus and another group, completely unrelated, that I identify with; the Dudeism movement. If you don't know it, do a google.
In both cases there seems to be a perception that in spite of everything that either is truly about, unless you are following the rules or doctrine you're not doing it right. And also in both cases, the true ethos can be summed up as just taking it easy. In the non-pedaling sense. But really, the only person who gives a sh*te about the rules is an aging, Vietnam vet tasked with caring for his ex-wife's dog.
To get back to my point, the whole idea of just taking it easy really is what it is all about. Rule #6. Don't overthink things. Just let things be as they are. And if you get hung up on something, let the rules/doctrine/cannon be your guide. They are simply guide posts. Or Dan Henrys,
On a related note, this past weekend's Strade Bianche validated one of Greg LeMan's rules from the Foreward. His Rule #10: The race is never over until the finish line.
@Stephen
I was yelling at the screen for the kid to find one last drop in the tank, but when Faboo and the defending champ are chasing you down there isn't much hope.
Tales keep popping up around the internet of supposed Rules based jackass-ism; of people using the Rules to be exclusionary and elitist. Yet never first hand accounts. It's as if there's a reactionary streak that WANTS this to be the case, who just don't get it.
The rules could all be reduced to the following two:
'You shall love your bike with all your heart, with all your soul and your mind and love your fellow velominatus as yourself'
Although don't be a jackass still seems more elegant
@Owen
Good point, and did you notice what Faboo did just after the finish? A flagrant violation of rule #49. But then again, he being Spartacus and all, that probably means this rule should be redefined. So much for the rules...
@Clank
I see what you did there, we will call it "Gianni 22:37-38".
@Owen
If a tryathlete feels the ribbin' it will end up nasty. They really are a most serious bunch trying hard not to be about their sports.
I know I know… badges, rules, whatev… I just couldn't help but think of this good ol' good ol' when I read the article. Uhhhh, did I just admit to reading an article ? Before posting ? Cheers all
@Slowtrane
Just because the pros sometimes don't follow the Rules doesn't mean the Rules are wrong. It often prove the point of the Rule, like when Wiggo was told to pick up his bike after smashing the Hour he looked really embarrassed and awkward about it.
It looks shit, no-one should do it, even Cancellar.