Rule #5: Racing Hoogerland-Style

Photo: The Atlantic

Johnny Hoogerland, on receiving the Tour de France Rule #5 Award:

I normally don’t drink that much beer anymore but having my first off-season beer in this glass makes it taste great. I moved to my new home and will find it a great place because it honors my way of racing.

Fitting words from the man on track to take over the mantle of Hardest Man In Cycling from Jens Voigt after he retires. I’m shocked, however, at the claim that he doesn’t drink much beer. Partly because beer rules, and partly because I’m flummoxed by what kind of post-ride recovery drink he has if not beer.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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brett says:

Dec 3 2011 at 12:20 pm

Awesome, the V-Pint is going straight to Johnny's pool room!
Ron says:

Dec 3 2011 at 1:12 pm

Hmm, now I'm curious - does he not like beer? Has he stopped to focus all his efforts on reaching his best form? Does he love beer and simply realize it might prevent him from being on form?

While I ride daily and think about cycling a lot, the focus the PROS must have is just staggering. Then again, so is there talent & power, like the watts discussion in the other discussion.

For me, it's hard to believe never drinking beer, never eating ice cream, training with that much focus. But then again, I can't put out 1400 watts.
scaler911 says:

Dec 3 2011 at 1:29 pm

@Dr C

@RedRanger

I'm confused based on the fact that he is Belgian. Thanks for sharing his reply.

I thought he was Dutch....they are the only cyclists on the planet who don't wish they were Belgian
I shall casually and deliberately wear my Hoogerland Heroes T-shirt today in due reverence
I see he wears the same shoes as me.....of course, mine aren't smeared in blood like his are - hardest of Hardmen

Pretty sure the Irish are happy not being Belgian........
DerHoggz says:

Dec 3 2011 at 4:12 pm

Hoogerland T. F. U.

On another note, I can't understand how Wiggo is such a good time trialist while being so skinny. Usually the bigger guys rule TTs, no?
RedRanger says:

Dec 3 2011 at 4:39 pm

@scaler911
Dont let me live that down. Pure idiocy on my part.
Blah says:

Dec 3 2011 at 5:06 pm

@brett
+1
G'phant says:

Dec 3 2011 at 6:05 pm

@brett
A+1. One of my all time favourite films, despite having no bikes and lots of Australians. I am reminded of if every time I try to be first to the top of the hill on a bunch ride: 'Tell him he's dreamiing.'

Very good to have got such a nice reply from Johnny H. Respec'.
Cyclops says:

Dec 4 2011 at 7:24 am

Johnny's wearing Pepe Le Pews - FTW!
pakrat says:

Dec 4 2011 at 10:04 am

@brett
Priceless.

And yes, the plasma on the white socks really pulls the kit together.
frank says:

Dec 4 2011 at 10:22 am

@snoov

Thanks @frank for letting us know he responded. Johnny was so full of awesome and magnanimity in the post stage interviews I had tears in my eyes. In fact the interview I have in mind should be the definition for magnanimous and to my ear, Dutch people speaking English sounds great (actually so do most foreigners to my ear).
To me it's no surprise to hear that he doesn't drink much beer. Alcohol is a toxin, although due to the history of Europe where our ancestors sanitised their drinking water by distilling we have developed a tolerance to it. In the Far East where their ancestors made Tea instead, they don't have the same tolerance for alcohol. The toxicity of alcohol draws me to the conclusion that any truly dedicated professional sportsman, while involved in some sort of tournament like a Grand Tour or Rugby World Cup for example, would naturally avoid alcohol in order to perform at their absolute best. Take the poor showing of England's rugby team just a few months ago as an example, some of them were drinking too much.
Of course we are not pros, and we don't represent our countries and have the hopes of millions watching and supporting us. We love bikes, we love riding them to the best of our abilities and having a few beers after. It's all about the bike for us and the fitness might not even come second. For Johnny and his professional peers the fitness is obviously far more important.
Saying that, he probably drinks wine instead of beer.

Absolutely agree (it was a joke). Alcohol - especially beer - has the additional double-whammy of containing loads of calories and slowing your metabolism down. So the calories you're consuming are also harder to burn off. Back to that "don't get fat" thing.

@brett
GOLD!!! Never seen that before...

@Ron
I think its just the little things you need to do as a Pro - you're already at 1% body fat and you need to cut that in half. So, out goes the beer.