Nothing says “amateur” more than an imperfect handlebar tape job, a dirty bike or a nasty grimy chain. Conversely, a clean bike feels faster. And new handlebar tape and a clean chain imbue a rider with extra fortitude and a little extra snap in the legs.
The professionals don’t need to wrap their own bars-they have full- time mechanics who can do it blindfolded. No matter how carefully I did my handlebar tape around shop owner George, he would regard the job, and then cruelly shoot me a look that said “amateur!” I have studied him wrapping tape. It looks effortless and he might also be talking to a customer, mocking a minion, his mind on many things – but the final result is perfection.
This drives me crazy.
It should not be so hard. I replace my tape maybe two or three times a year, just seldom enough to forget how to do it properly.
The Velominati have spent a lot of energy debating bike color co-ordination (see Rule eight) and I had a bad tire/tape issue, so I had to go white (I don’t do black tape). There is no doubt white looks great; the question is how long will it look great?
The bike shop I like to use, close to us, did not carry my favorite Fizik tape. It is bombproof and magically never ever gets dirty. So I bought what they carried, some white Deda tape.
I stripped off the old and tried to put on the new. After three attempts of rewrapping with more tension and less overlap each time, I was still short on one side. The tape was so stretched I might as well have been wrapping my bars with plastic wrap or the old Benotto cello tape. Son-of-a-bee-aatch!! (F’ing Italians, would it kill them to give me another few centimeters? The other side was better – could they be different lengths? F’ing Italians!) The only way to make it even meant both sides ended up short and too far from the stem-completely unacceptable! This put me in a mood most foul.
I called the other shop within riding distance, a Specialized shop, and was told they had three kinds of white Specialized tape. Three kinds- really? Of course when I got there, it wasn’t so-but the one they did carry has rocked my world. Specialized S-Wrap Classic 3 ply fake leather with some sweet dot perforations. It is $25 but supplies more than enough tape for the perfect wrap. It’s mighty fine looking and feels perfect; perfect cushion, perfect grip, oh, I’m in love. But, will it stay white? How bad will it look in a month? Two weeks of fair weather riding leaves the tape still bright white.
Again Specialized has impressed me with their form and function. I have some Specialized S-Works road shoes and a pair of their leg warmers and they are great. Their glue-less inner tube patches: the jury is out. Sure they lose some cachet because their items are made in China not Italy but until the Italians give me a little more tape, I’m an S-Wrap boy.
*Is it wrong to be this excited about handlebar tape? Is it dangerous to ask this question? I’m hesitant to answer either of these. And yes, Rules violations in photo, how many can you find?
I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…
Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…
The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…
Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…
This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…
I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…
View Comments
@frank "If God is a cyclist..." is not quite what was in my minds eye. "She" to me is a beautiful woman, the most beautiful (my wife understands, she is very secure in our marriage) and the way I worded the passage had. . . well, you know - shit, do I have to spell it out man?
So no Rule breaking for the big guy??
Just a thought; Rule #5 gets so much air time here and is my favorite that I had completely overlooked rule #6. Man that is so true it is now tied for first! Thank you Frank, you really are the Zenyodarati of the wheel - Awesome.
Benotto tape
Here is Rob on a real custom-steel-lugged American made racer. The bike was made by Ed Blank, an American who learned the craft in Italy. It sports small wheels, though they must be 24" not 20", huge front chainring, benotto tape job, no socks(track racer look) f'ing Marresi shoes(oh my heart be still), Castelli kit(skin suit?) and purple and white hairnet. So 'core. Rob is mixing it up with the likes of Davis Phinney in this crit. This is a great photo, I must say. Rob also rode this once in the Mt. Washington Hill Climb and thought it was a great climbing machine.
*!*!?! I somehow messed up Frank, can you cram said photo in above comment? It's in the media directory on Velominati site. prego
Yeah - just email it to me!! You're killing me with the suspense!!!
Updated: I never read the second half of your comment regarding where it was. I was frazzled like that time Brett posted the picture of his skull tan lines.
@john
Done. Bask in it.
Whoa! This is Rob? We have a true badass among the velominti! Let's hear some more...
Whew - my cover is blown... I loved that little machine it was ahead of its time. John-o thanks for the image! Aside from his many skills (bikes, writing, women, science) the man is an excellent photographer ala Watson!
I had forgotten that it was 24" what I remember is that we got really good sew ups for it. The chain ring was a 60 tooth ordered from some time trial outfit in England and it was a 5 speed. I was the test bunny for it and it was just at the end of my serious racing days and the season so I did not ride it that much - I really do not remember if I rode it up Mt. Washington... myth I think.
More later I am off for 165 km effort on flat (I hope) part of L.I.
I will be peaking in July!! Thanks John
P.S. That is Benotto Tape that matched the frame color to a T.
@Rob
That pic is quintessential coolness. The hairnet, Benotto tape (be still my beating heart!), the toe clips and Sidis, the short shorts, the red Coca Cola bottle (always the coolest water bottle, not matter the frame/kit color), the experimental frame design...an era gone by. What carbon monocoque frame designer is going to say, "Sure, lets give 12 inch tires a go!"
I love that the chainstays rise UP to the BB, owing to the tiny wheels, I'm guessing.
What pressure were you running those tubs at? There seems to be no compression in them at all. What is that, like 500psi?!?
The hairnet was my favorite bit of kit, I had picked it up in London at my old lbs which happened to be Condor for 4 years(I was on Clerkenwell Rd. Joe). On a return visit to London one summer when I had been racing a season or 2 I saw it - Condor colors and much nicer than the black clunky, ugly U.S. ones at the time. I was disapointed when we went to hard hats as I no longer had the smartest lid in the Northeast...
The tubs, I think came from Germany so they had my usual 120lbs which is what I ran for fast crits. I miss Marresi's, or just great leather shoes. I do not miss toe clips (too many spills stuck to the bike). After Greg and Bernard used Look in the Tour I jumped at clipless and have never looked (Ha Ha) back. Although having said that I actually like clips except that you have to take the bike with you when you do that crash thing. I wish I had a better memory for names - the straps with the fiberglass strip between the leather - the Best, plus the little plastic pull tab you would screw on to the end of the strap, then do 2 straps, a la trackies and man you could pull so hard your knees would distend before you'd pull out.
Hey its a world gone by but the racing is still the same. Even so I was on the old Raleigh last week and a kid actually said "I can't believe you take your hands off the bars to shift" - Jeesus don't let him go for his water bottle, its a camelfuck hump for him!