European Posterior Tubular (EPTB)

EPMS." width="620" height="465" /> The European Posterior Tubular, tied on by a toe strap. This ain’t no EPMS.

The divisive nature of Rule #29 is not to be underestimated. It is but a humble satchel, but our rejection of its use sends people completely out of their minds. One fine gentleman even threatened my editor at Cyclist Magazine with cancellation of his subscription on the basis that they published an article wherein I espoused the virtues of going EPMS-less. If I recall correctly, the reader felt my writing was, “a black eye on an otherwise flawless magazine.” Some people, it appears, really love their saddle bags.

Nevertheless, the truth remains: they are ugly and there is no need for one if you choose your tools carefully and maintain your bicycle appropriately. Granted, if you prefer an al fresco lunch mid-ride and therefore require room for a baguette, some brie, and a nice bottle of Burgundy, you may require more than a jersey pocket. Similarly, if you are of the mechanical inclination that requires you carry a press for on-the-road headset replacements, you might also require some additional storage. That said, if your mechanical skills are at a level that your bicycle is in such a state, I might argue that carrying a cell phone and an emergency contact list is really all you need because the tools are unlikely to help.

But I digress. Ugly though the EPMS may be, it is obviously perfectly acceptable to tie a spare tubular tire under your saddle. This is for the obvious and irrefutable reason that riding tubs is for the more cultured Velominatus and strapping a tire under the saddle is the traditional way the Europeans have handled carrying a spare tire ever since they stopped carrying them strapped over their shoulders. Do not allow yourself to be distracted by the fact that a European Posterior Tubular is often mistaken for an saddlebag. One is a nod to our heritage, the other an abomination sense and style. Trust me on this.

But carrying a spare tub does pose a challenge: how do you roll it up into a small enough package that it (a) doesn’t sway (b) doesn’t rub the insides of your pistoning guns and (c) doesn’t fall off and get tangled up in your wheel.

The first two are a matter of what style of tire to carry. The natural inclination is to carry a spare tire identical to the ones you are riding on your wheels, but that is likely to be a 23 or 25 mm tire and will be rather bulky when rolled up. Instead, the spare should be considered an emergency tire intended to get you safely through the rest of your ride; you’ll be pulling it off and gluing it on properly when you get home, so it can be chosen for its folding size and weight rather than to match it to the tires you normally ride. Then comes the question of how to roll it up into a tiny package which can be neatly strapped under the saddle (see photos). Finally – and I learned this the hard way – if the tire does come loose over some unusually rough roads (say, washboards on a high speed gravel descent), you will want it to stay in the small bundle rather than unwinding and getting tangled in your back wheel.

European Posterior Tubular Guidelines:

  1. Find a light, 19mm tubular tire. I use one by TUFO; it has no inner tube so it is skinny and light and rolls up tight.
  2. Pre-glue the tire and follow the below procedure to roll it up (photos).
  3. Wrap an industrial strength rubber band around the tire. This will keep it in its rolled up bundle with or without a toe strap, meaning it will stay in said bundle even as it tumbles from your saddle.
  4. Us a leather toe-clip strap and a leather toe-clip strap only to affix said tire to saddle. No pouches, not fabric straps. Make sure it is tight and secure the loose end of the strap.
  5. Respond to all accusations of violating Rule #29 with a defiant but tempered disgust which subtly hints that the accuser is an unsophisticated clincher rider who doesn’t understand the greater nuances of our sport.

[dmalbum path=”/velominati.com/content/Photo Galleries/frank@velominati.com/Folding a Tub/”/]

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @piwakawaka

    The thing that really gets me is he laid his bike down drive-side down and has that beautiful frame laying right on the edge of that concrete curb! Oh, and not the rolled up spare laying on the road.

  • @Teocalli Stans+valve core wrench plus non-CO2 means of inflation+a single spare tubular (of the same damn size as what you're riding, not some skinny thing) and Bob's your uncle. I'll admit I, after finishing the last 180K of a 400K riding a flat tubular (took two spares and a pit-stop) rode clinchers with a huge handlebar bag at PBP. I've since discovered that Stans sealant actually works reliably, unlike the Pit-Stop stuff, but you've got to be able to carry an ounce or two of it, and be able to pull a valve core to inject it. I've found I'm faster injecting a half-ounce of Stans and reinflating with a full-size hand pump than I am changing a clincher flat with CO2.

    Cheers,

    Will

    William M. deRosset

    Fort Collins, CO

  • @Teocalli

    Back pocket with pump thus..........

    +1. I've never completely bought into Rule #29 (so sue me and revoke my Level 2 Velominatus status), especially when the proposed alternative is a tubeless tire secured under the saddle with a leather toe strap, or stuffed into a FedEx bag!? But then, Teocalli (or "Trivially" as my auto-correct insists) presents an efficient and elegant example and I will now happily toss my EPMS and stuff that in a jersey pocket.

  • This is one rule I break religiously.  I put all my shit in my EPMS, and I leave that thing on my bike.  I know I always have my stuff in it.  I don't have to empty, then refill my stuff into my pockets every time I take a ride.  I don't have to worry about flicking out something and losing it when retrieving a banana or gel.  I can put my sticky wet sugary wrappers back in my pockets rather than litter the road with them without worrying about coating my tools in crap.  I can carry stuff like cables which shouldn't not need servicing as I look after my bike, but you never know when someone will rack up next to you and yank on your gear cables with their pedals and kink or stretch one through no fault of your own, and when I'm enjoying a cafe stop I can actually sit back without puncturing my kidneys, as a mini pump is not *the right tool for that particular job*.

  • @Dan W

    I put all my shit in my EPMS, and I leave that thing on my bike. I know I always have my stuff in it.

    Bike (singular)? As in, you only have one bike?

  • @WMdeRosset

    @Teocalli Stans+valve core wrench plus non-CO2 means of inflation+a single spare tubular (of the same damn size as what you're riding, not some skinny thing) and Bob's your uncle. I'll admit I, after finishing the last 180K of a 400K riding a flat tubular (took two spares and a pit-stop) rode clinchers with a huge handlebar bag at PBP. I've since discovered that Stans sealant actually works reliably, unlike the Pit-Stop stuff, but you've got to be able to carry an ounce or two of it, and be able to pull a valve core to inject it. I've found I'm faster injecting a half-ounce of Stans and reinflating with a full-size hand pump than I am changing a clincher flat with CO2.

    Cheers,

    Will

    William M. deRosset

    Fort Collins, CO

    Thanks, I was thinking of going in that direction at the moment I have all bases covered with 1 spare tub, a pot of Stans, spare valve cores and a foam can.  Had a trial run on some local tracks today 65K of 50:50 road/trail and the Vitoria Corsas came through OK on some (at times) terrible surface so encouraged by that for the June event where (hopefully) the trail sections will be better than the stuff I rode today.

  • @Geraint

    @Dan W

    I put all my shit in my EPMS, and I leave that thing on my bike. I know I always have my stuff in it.

    Bike (singular)? As in, you only have one bike?

    We all start somewhere.

  • @Geraint

    Bike (singular)? As in, you only have one bike?

    Yes. It endures 100% of the V I have to wring out. It suffices, for now.

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