Gravity

In defiance of Gravity, we touch the heavens

Gravity is the most unavoidable force on Earth, with the possible exception of Stupidity. And like with Stupidity, you can take measures to reduce its influence on you, but you won’t get rid of it completely, assuming you’re staying on this planet. From the very moment we’re born, Gravity takes its unrelenting hold on us – which isn’t altogether bad because I learned from watching Despicable Me that as soon as someone is smart enough to invent anti-gravity serum, someone will be stupid enough to leave a skylight open.

We Cyclists protect a secret from the rest of the world: we can defy gravity. Riding allows us to float a few meters above the ground, suspended in a cloak of V. Add a little speed to the mix and a maybe few sweeping switchbacks and we are as close to achieving human flight as we will ever get.

Once we trade flat roads for the hills, Gravity reveals its true secret to us: the mind can overcome physical limits when we form the cohesive unit of bicycle and rider. There is a symbiotic bond that forms; Gravity pulls us down toward the bottom of the hill, and we require our strength to counter its force and scale the heights. The strength required to achieve this takes a heavy toll on our body, and it is only through focus and determination that we keep the legs turning over smoothy. Riding back down the other side, we learn to fool Gravity and explore the intersection of centripetal force, friction, and our old friend Stupidity.

With practice, we learn that our mind can drive us to overcome the the physical limits of not just our bodies, but Gravity itself. Its hold on us remains, but the effects are greatly diminished. In defiance of Gravity, we rise to touch the heavens and ride where angels fly.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Teocalli says:

Apr 3 2014 at 9:32 am

@ChrisO Ha Ha. It's a system that is well designed to turn out a very nice sort of layabout. Bertie Wooster is an excellent example.
ohbejoyful says:

Apr 3 2014 at 10:07 am

Jump ahead to minute 9 for a neurological vindication of this article's premise and every rider's experience:

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/01/opinion/slomo.html

First post here. Hello, friends.

Ron
Ccos says:

Apr 3 2014 at 11:24 am

@Teocalli

@Chris Nice one.

@Andrew There should be a link to the Darwin awards. It is obviously a primary mutation otherwise it would have naturally selected itself out long ago.

Yes, and then there's the quote "God loves drunks and idiots." This explains somewhat the mitigating factors in the proliferation of stupidity and perhaps it's paradoxical ability to prevent people's self-selection for removal from the gene pool.

Perhaps too a proclivity to then drive engine-revving pickup trucks near cyclists.
Rob says:

Apr 3 2014 at 11:30 am

@ohbejoyful

Jump ahead to minute 9 for a neurological vindication of this article's premise and every rider's experience:

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/01/opinion/slomo.html

First post here. Hello, friends.

Ron

Nice one! It does seem to explain the reason we all get captivated by 2 wheels. I like the big picture of what the vid is about too and that may explain why I feel no guilt for my hours on the bike?

Glad you joined in.
Kevin says:

Apr 3 2014 at 12:34 pm

@wilburrox All I see is pure Joy written on her face!
therealpeel says:

Apr 3 2014 at 1:37 pm

@Teocalli I tried watching the video with no sound and it made absolutely no sense to me, although it probably wouldn't even with sound...I assume a 5 wheeled bike wouldn't be described as a V-Bike...
Gianni says:

Apr 3 2014 at 6:56 pm

@Bjarne Nordberg

"I don't think there are other sports where a normal trained person can climb mountains and feel great. Someone well trained, when he climbs a mountain, feels like a god.
This is the magic of cycling."

- Valentino Campagnolo

That, is a fine quote. And then we get to descent like gods too! Lord knows, steep descending on foot is the worst, it's crippling. On a bike pure thrill.
TomasESDK says:

Apr 3 2014 at 8:03 pm

@ChrisO

@LeoTea

@Rob I'll take hills over a headwind any day of the week. At least gravity is consistent. It doesn't change strength or direction on a whim. Conquering a hill gives me a sense of achievement. Wrestling a headwind just annoys me.

Gravity is easier to overcome than aerodynamics.

If you go twice as hard uphill you go twice as fast.

To go twice as fast into the wind requires eight times the effort.

Apparently it's physics.

that's why I got dropped every single time by my mates: Denmark gets plenty of wind but not that many "gravity assisted training places" . I do need to get my V-meter * 8 and apply healthy dose of rule 5.
Teocalli says:

Apr 4 2014 at 1:25 am

@therealpeel

@Teocalli I tried watching the video with no sound and it made absolutely no sense to me, although it probably wouldn't even with sound...I assume a 5 wheeled bike wouldn't be described as a V-Bike...

I can understand that - without the explanation it would make no sense whatsoever. It does with sound though. The nub is that it turns out that in zero gravity you cannot turn on a bike.
wilburrox says:

Apr 4 2014 at 3:34 am

@Gianni Precisely! You run to the top of a hill and then what? Run down the other side? Big whoop... I like riding my bike up a hill as much as the next guy. Maybe even more. And to be able to do it faster than my buddies on a given day? Or even better in a race. And digging deeper to do it? All great fun and satisfying. But as long as I've been riding a bike I've always looked at getting to the top usually meant good fun coming down. That's when we fly. On the other hand, running? Ugghhh.

That all said, the opportunity to take a ski lift to the top of mtn's in order to ride a bike down? I guess that'd mostly be a big travel full suspension mtn bike kinda gig... that kinda thing doesn't grab me so much. Maybe it's the earning the ride down, after the effort to get to the top, that makes it more rewarding. Cheers, RC