This Hunger is insatiable

My favorite feeling is perhaps the empty hollowness of hunger. That statement, in itself, is a declaration of the privileged life I’ve led; it is borderline obscene to boast of such a thing in a world where 842 million people don’t have enough to eat. Nevertheless, being lucky enough to have been raised in America and just competent enough to hold down a job, I find myself in the enviable position of needing to invoke “discipline” in order to experience this sensation.

All that aside, I love feeling hungry, both physically and metaphorically. Physically, being hungry brings something primal out in me; there is an edge that awakens which feels dormant when I’ve eaten. I’m sharper, more alive somehow.

When I eat or drink too much, I feel it in my flesh; I feel the lethargy that comes with food everywhere. I feel it on my back, I feel it in my limbs, I feel it in my eyes – everything is weighed down and blurred. When I am overweight, I find I can go all day without eating and hardly give it a thought. When I’m training and riding well and my weight is down, I can eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner and never feel sated. That is the feeling of hunger to which I refer; not a desire to starve, but a physical condition where sustenance feels impossible to achieve. This is a beautiful state where everything feels alive and there is a sharpness and precision in every motion.

There is also a metaphorical hunger, which I don’t think we can achieve without the physical sort. The metaphorical sort is borne of desire and need. This is what drives us to achieve more than we normally would. Sean Kelly talks of this hunger in his book by the same name; in his opening chapter, he says he would rather fall into the any of the greenhouses below the sweeping hairpins along the descent from the Poggio into Sanremo than face defeat by Moreno Argentin. That is hunger in the metaphorical sense.

I am a better person when I feel hunger; I have drive, I have humility, I have courage. When hunger stirs, we come alive with an urgency we don’t otherwise find. Without it, there is no compulsion to act, to fight, or to endure.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • @meursault

    I don't think it's borderline obscene to discuss hunger of any kind. It's a natural function and instinct of the body. It may be obscene to over eat, which most of us probably do in the west. It takes discipline to go hungry or work at fitness and such. These disciplines are all things we should take the time to think about whenever possible. Nice words Frank, made me think.

    Ah, the old "Borderline Obscene". Brings back memories. The best Tex-Mex porno film I ever saw.

  • @unversio

    Granola! Any warnings against eating good ole fresh granola in place of heavier meals? I'm assuming that this choice is safe. Ordered from Bob's Red Mill and having a box of granola delivered to my desk is different.

    Why would you order granola ? It's like going to the LBS to get your punctures repaired.

    Pretty much anything you buy will have more sugar and more fat than what you could make yourself, and granola is pretty damn easy.

    Having a quick look at the dietary values on their website it looks to me to have as much sugar and fat as many commercially available cereals. You'd probably be better off with Kelloggs Cornflakes although I don't have a box in front of me to compare. It's certainly got more fat and sugar and overall calories than Weetabix or Puffed Wheat / Oats.

    It all adds up.

  • @Gianni

    @meursault

    @TommyTubolare

    @chipomarc

    Dude seriously quit COTHO trolling under this nice article. You were told to piss off on more than several occasions on other forums and you're here now. Do yourself a favor and wake up from the Lance nightmare you continuosly living in. Your links to Lance activities are really valid and important only to you. Wish I could recommend somebody to help you but it's hopeless. It has been going on for so long all over the net that I begin to think you're the COTHO himself in disguise.

    Gianni, now may not be the time!

    Heeeheee. Maybe yes, maybe no.

    Oh, FFS. Dance of the Seven Veils is it? Gianni twirling slowly, divesting himself of silk layers? Is this really attractive?

  • @frank

    Having doped through his career (and after!) doesn't mean he didn't know how to diet and train.

    Just seems dangerous to me to be using someone as a dietary or training role-model when he wasn't telling us -- and we're probably(!) not on -- the full program.  If your blood and general organism isn't boosted by injections of pharmaceuticals, you might need to put in more, or at least more of some things, via a more traditional method, i.e. eating.

    Back on-topic, I was re-reading an article about post-war riders a couple of days ago, who'd seen a World War and come from the fields or mines.  That'll give you a hunger not too many of us know all that much about, I'd dare to suggest.

    Also, when it comes to some things, whether crap food or luxuries, moderation often leads to mediocrity, I find.  Abstinence is discipline and strength, and yes, hunger.

  • @scaler911

    Food, starving oneself, what to eat, when, how? Y'all are missing probably the bigger point of the article, hunger to achieve a goal. The metaphorical hunger that drives us to participate in this insane, beautiful sport. The same kinda hunger to succeed, to get to and over that plateau (which can also be literal or metaphorical).

    Anyway, fab article penned at the exact right time of year, especially for those of us living above the 45th Parallel N. Find that hunger, feed it, but satiate it very rarely. We need it.

    Yep, right on. I found this a great article to come at a great time. I have set myself a very stout off-the-bike goal and if I just keep my head down, I think I can have it cleared for the Giro, which will be a perfect launch into summer cycling.

    Cycling goals and really any sporting goals come easy, it's the work goals that are harder. But hey, riding bikes is kids stuff and work, well, that is what you avoid until you have to grow up.

  • @frank

    @Puffy

    @chipomarc

    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sStK1KG8lnA

    COTHO');" class="comment-link">COTHO " Sometimes you have to miss a meal"

    Huh? I don't know how old that video is, but we know better now. You eat enough carbs to fuel your training with a small deficit. Note: small, 500 Cal max my coach keeps telling me. Don't eat enough, your peformace suffers in the same way he describes it suffering when you bonk. Take it too far, and you start loosing muscle! Skipping a whole mean? No way! Not unless you ate too much the meal prior.

    This is such total bullshit. Your body burns the easiest fuel it can find; it won't start on muscle until you're in a hunger camp.

    By this reasoning no one would ever lose weight or starve to death.

    He's right, Frank, but not in the way that you think he's wrong. When you train, you damage muscle. Your protein intake is what allows repair and rebuilding of the muscle damaged through hard work. Over tie, the body adapts by adding muscle to deal with the high workload. When you deny the body the calories to recover (especially by limiting proteins), you run the risk of losing the muscle damaged in training. It's not being used for metabolism - as you say, the body won't burn muscle for fuel until you are already in dire straits - but it can still be lost.

    I'm not sure that's what he meant, but I'd like to think so. Skipping meals and riding oneself into the ground improves the threshold for suffering, or rather for cracking under suffering, but also limits performance. Try the experiment - ride the same roads with plenty of fuel and on fumes. Generally speaking, you will perform better, generating more stress for your body to adapt to, with eating than without. I'm not saying we should all get fat, but we shouldn't overdo it either.

    If you haven't, Check out Allen Lim's work. He explains things much better than I do.

  • @Marcus

    @meursault

    I don't think it's borderline obscene to discuss hunger of any kind. It's a natural function and instinct of the body. It may be obscene to over eat, which most of us probably do in the west. It takes discipline to go hungry or work at fitness and such. These disciplines are all things we should take the time to think about whenever possible. Nice words Frank, made me think.

    Ah, the old "Borderline Obscene". Brings back memories. The best Tex-Mex porno film I ever saw.

    Once again, by post #  51 the discussion goes completely (and hilariously) off the rails.  Thanks Marcus!

  • Last year during one of his Eurosport gigs King Kelly was asked about his fighting weight. I was amazed when he said that he was 12-13 kilos heavier now than he was back in his prime. Kelly is no blob, he's still in good shape but it brings home the importance of leaving the table still hungry. It will save you money too; in these parts a "hungry hooer" is someone who is carefully with money. Eating clean and a bit of willpower is a lot cheaper than light wheels, carbon stems and titanium bolts. As I think Kate Moss once said, "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels."

  • @ChrisO They claim that that prefer not to add anything, especially when it comes to Wheat Germ. I like it as the main reason for ordering Granola, Muesli, etc. from Bob. I'm curious why you would care where my Granola came from anyway.

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