Categories: La Vie VelominatusNostalgiaTradition

La Vie Velominatus: Rebirth

Spring blossoms in Seattle

Wind is an asshole. I have no patience left for it. It has all of it been used up, gone, finished. It is the only force that I’m aware of (with the possible exception of gravity) that is more stubborn and less willing to listen to reason than I myself am. It blows me around on my bike, it embezzles speed from my Magnificent Stroke. No matter how emphatically I lose my temper with it, no matter the unprintable curses and insults I hurl in its direction, it just keeps on blowing like a big stupid blowing thing.

The weather systems that move in and out of the Puget Sound Convergence Zone are accompanied by a gale and, and as every Cyclist knows, gales blow exclusively against the direction of travel. With the changing seasons come the frequent storm systems and the unreliability of the meteorologists is amplified by the complexity of the weather patterns. Taking Bike Number One is a gamble during any of these times, but sometimes living dangerously feels better than it is sensible. Every now and then, taking #1 when you really shouldn’t can offer a bit of much-needed redemption.

Fall winds steel us for the arrival of colder, darker days. Winter around here comes with less wind, but with annoyances of its own. Our friends in more harsh climates than mine will agree: we have had a dark Winter here in the Northern Hemisphere. Seattle is a mild place to live, but even here the damp, cold, short days have taken their toll. The sun is down when I arrive at work, and it is down when I leave for home. With vitamin D in short supply, our moods sour, the chickens stop laying their eggs (there is no creature more entitled than a clucking chicken who refuses to lay an egg), and alcohol, food, and sloth start looking like viable plans of remediation.

But as Winter makes its slow exit, the winds begin to blow once again and Spring starts to dot hints that she is about to make her entrance. The redbud trees are in blossom, and the Earth is letting loose the green stalks of tulips and crocuses. The work we did over the winter was supposed to make us feel strong and fast; instead, trees bow to our arrival as the wind pushes against our face and robs us of the free flight that a Cyclist in form works so hard to achieve.

Nevertheless, this weekend I rode with bare legs, the strong headwind filling my senses with the fresh smell of damp, life-giving earth and budding blossoms. Rebirth is infectious and like the trees and plants around me, so too have I been reborn.

Wind might well be an asshole, but when it signals warmer, brighter days it somehow seems more tolerable. Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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The Oracle says:

Mar 12 2014 at 6:50 am

@RedRanger

@tweed we had some flurries in my area this morning. Looks like tonights gonna be the last real cold snap for the winter.

Great. Now you've surely doomed us to freezing temps through the end of May. I did a ride on June 2 last year where the high temperature was 45 degrees with rain and wind.
PeakInTwoYears says:

Mar 12 2014 at 8:17 am

@RedRanger

@PeakInTwoYears like I keep saying, "planes are easy"

Its been a matter Id rathet be riding than fixing. After I get #1 road and #1 CX ready to go, I'll take a look at it.

Just giving you shit. Let me know what was causing your issue. I need all the vicarious experience with those damned things that I can get.
cyclebrarian says:

Mar 12 2014 at 8:37 am

@Ccos

@cyclebrarian

@wilburrox

@frank A visit to New Orleans for family AND Rouge Roubaix? (!) I can assure ya that there is most certainly a Laissez Les Bon Temps Roule attitude just about anywhere in Louisiana that carries in to the race. Early a.m. I'm squaring away start times and am informed by race staff that there is still time to get drunk. Probably only half serious I'm guessing. Anyways, someone from the master's group posted this year's race day blockhouse climb on youtube. This comes at mile 65 with grade in excess of 15% on gravel and the run-up road being lunar landscape. Last year was fresh gravel = deep and Hard. This year was washed out so FAST... therefore = Hard. That's the old saying isn't it? Doesn't get easier, just faster. RC

I just read about that event. And saw this pic and read about this guy:

Apparently, he wiped out at mile 30 and rode the other 70 miles in this condition. Definitely Rule #5 compliant.

Would anyone but a cyclist do this? Would anyone else but a cyclist understand doing this?

Do tri-hards have rules too? (Rule 1: be annoying, Rule #2: ride your bike like shit, Rule #3: sleeveless jerseys and arm warmers together are ok, please make sure they don't match...)

I'm sure 'merely a flesh wound' was uttered many, many times.
the Engine says:

Mar 12 2014 at 8:52 am

@Teocalli

@the Engine ...............other than finding that if you turn the pads through 90 degrees they sometimes start working again.

I'm trying to get my brain around which plane you are talking about. As most disc pads (ie every pad I've ever come across) cannot actually be turned in the vertical plane due to locating lugs/pin this leaves me with the vision of jamming the pads through the holes in the rotor blades. Granted that would stop you but does seem to be a sort of one off application followed by a Milligan-esque "fortunately my fall was broken by the ground". This could of course account for the bent discs........

Which is why I'm not allowed to touch any part of my bike with any sort of tool unless there is no choice whatsoever.

The pads are circular on my MTB and if you rotate them through a quarter turn by turning the knurled thing on the other site of the mounting from the pad they start to grip again - I am also aware that this moves the pad closer to the disc but its the change in orientation rather than their decreased proximity to the surface of the disc that makes them work.

Have you been at the Puckoon again?

Also note that I set you up for the tool gag of your choice.
Mike_P says:

Mar 12 2014 at 8:55 am

@Ccos

@cyclebrarian

@wilburrox

@frank A visit to New Orleans for family AND Rouge Roubaix? (!) I can assure ya that there is most certainly a Laissez Les Bon Temps Roule attitude just about anywhere in Louisiana that carries in to the race. Early a.m. I'm squaring away start times and am informed by race staff that there is still time to get drunk. Probably only half serious I'm guessing. Anyways, someone from the master's group posted this year's race day blockhouse climb on youtube. This comes at mile 65 with grade in excess of 15% on gravel and the run-up road being lunar landscape. Last year was fresh gravel = deep and Hard. This year was washed out so FAST... therefore = Hard. That's the old saying isn't it? Doesn't get easier, just faster. RC

I just read about that event. And saw this pic and read about this guy:

Apparently, he wiped out at mile 30 and rode the other 70 miles in this condition. Definitely Rule #5 compliant.

Would anyone but a cyclist do this? Would anyone else but a cyclist understand doing this?

Do tri-hards have rules too? (Rule 1: be annoying, Rule #2: ride your bike like shit, Rule #3: sleeveless jerseys and arm warmers together are ok, please make sure they don't match...)

That's Rule #5 right there. Judging by the vacant stare, the concussion was kicking in nicely. He's been studying at the Laurens Ten Dam school of hardmanship.
Mike_P says:

Mar 12 2014 at 9:03 am

@Teocalli

@Mike_P

The downside to all this rebirth talk is when you're sitting at work, looking out of the window at beautiful spring sunshine. I know what I'd rather be doing.

Well fortunately I'm WFH so will sneak out later.

Git. Welcome back by the way!!
frank says:

Mar 12 2014 at 9:48 am

@PeakInTwoYears

@RedRanger

@PeakInTwoYears I hear you on that. My MTB makes a horrible sound in the rear. Cant figure it out. I just brake less. I'm all about simplicity on a road/CX bike, which is why I went with mini V's on the new one. I hated wanted Frank to explain it for Ivor.

Wait a minute. What the fuck do you do for a living? Hello? If you can't figure this one out, I'm taking the fucking train, amigo.

+1 Badge to you, matey.
frank says:

Mar 12 2014 at 9:48 am

@Pedale.Forchetta

Against the wind, Tuscany, Saturday 8th March 2014.

Is it just me or is Cav slimming down? He looks mean in that shot.
ped says:

Mar 12 2014 at 9:55 am

@frank exactly what I thought at TA today

definitely leaner in the face
Ccos says:

Mar 12 2014 at 10:00 am

@Mike_P Yep, sometimes there's a fine line between "bad-ass" and "dumb-ass". (I'm erring on the side of bad-ass in both photos).