Minimalist toolkit: lightweight and compact, it fits into the center pocket.

Even as a Pre-Cambrian Velominatus, the rusty wires in my brain must have made the connection between my machine’s aesthetics and the lack of a saddle bag; I can’t remember a time when I rode with a European Posterior Man Satchel. But riding without a saddle bag means the tools go in the pocket, and that means great care must be take in their selection; it has taken the better part of 30 years for my toolkit to evolve to the point where it is today: a minimalist set of highly reliable tools, each carefully selected for its function, form, and weight.

In addition to the endless cycle of tools that have come in and out of the kit, their locations have changed over the years. I’ve spread them across all three pockets, careful to distribute the weight evenly. I’ve put the heaviest items in the center pocket and kept the lighter ones in the side pockets. I’ve put all the weight in the side pockets and kept the center pocket free for stuffing with other items. I’ve ridden with minipump, with CO2, with minipump and C02. I’ve strapped the pump to my seatpost (we can’t all be genius all the time). I’ve carried two multi-tools, I’ve carried loose allen keys. I’ve carried chain tools. I’ve carried multi-tools with integrated chain tools. Suffice to say, nearly every conceivable permutation has been tried.

Before I go on, I want to make a point very clear: here we are wandering deep into Velominatus territory. Every item has been selected for a function, but that function is presupposed by the notion that our bicycles are meticulously cared for and we do not expect to make major roadside repairs. Punctures, silencing a creak or rattle, making a minor shifting adjustment, straightening a handlebar, or tweaking a saddle are the types of repairs within the scope of what may be expected mid-ride. Broken chains, snapped cables, broken spokes, handlebars, or saddles are failures that are to be preempted before departure and if they happen during a ride, one is expected to limp home or find alternative means of transportation. If going on a longer ride with no bail-out, one is to adjust their kit accordingly to account for self-reliance.

I also realize that I’ve now jinxed myself for tomorrow’s Cogal. (But I said it ironically, so I think I’m safe.)

The following considerations factor into my kit selection (in no particular order):

  1. I used to carry two (or more) spare tubes, several Co2 canisters, and a mini pump. I’m not sure exactly how many punctures I was expecting to have during my rides, but I am sure I was prepared for them. That fact that I rarely flat never figured heavily in my planning.
  2. Patch kits have gone from being big clunky things complete with a tube of glue that smelled alarmingly good when opened, to small things you’re more likely to lose than to notice you’re carrying it.
  3. Minipumps have become very small and very light, while still providing enough pressure to get you home.
  4. C02 chucks have gotten small and light, and are reasonably inexpensive.
  5. C02 canisters are similarly inexpensive, and based on how frequently I use them, do not seem an unreasonable investment.
  6. Loose allen keys are ungainly and can be lost; a screwdriver even more so.
  7. Most of the critical bolts on a bicycle take either a 4mm or 5mm allen key; a screwdriver head is similarly critical as sometimes a derailleur stop needs to be changed. 3mm or 6mm keys are rarely required.
  8.  Tools are heavy, and the aggregate weight of the toolkit can be significant. Take care to find lightweight, compact tools (that still function well) and you can dramatically reduce the weight you carry with you.
  9. Latex tubes are significantly lighter and more compact that standard tubes.
  10. iPhones are wicked rad, but Steve Jobs was clearly not a cyclist. Those things weigh like tanks.

Nirvana is a state we cannot hope to reach, though La Vie Velominatus may carry us to its outer boundaries. That is where I feel I am today when it comes to my tool kit, the contents of which are the Lezyne V5 Multitool, Lezyne Trigger DriveLezyne Smark Kit, two Lezyne Alloy Levers, two 12g Co2 cartridges, my phone, cash, ID, and inhaler (like most Pros, I’m asthmatic). I organize my kit into separate small plastic bags, but do not store the lot in a Rule #31 Sack, like many of my esteemed peers. Instead, I opt to keep things stored separately in my center jersey pocket, such that I am able to pull items such as my phone or multitool out of my pocket (while riding) without needing to remove everything else with it.

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frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • Thats quite nice of you. Id tell them to cache their co2 first and if they tucked it up they could use my pump.@Calmante

    I agree. That's why no CO2 for me. That pump I carry with me has been used on plenty of other people's flats to "save" their cartridges. Lame.

  • @minion
    done it. No crash, wore off some tyre tread. Now I keep my hand touching the seat stay so it doesn't drift toward seat tube and trouble.

  • Completely OT, but does anyone know of anyone streaming links for Mallorca? I have one for Qatar, but would like to see some Schlecking.

  • @itburns
    I'll elaborate on my "cursed day" and things mentioned since that post. I think I have experienced "normal" flat rates. Maybe one every 2+ years or so? Austin Cogal I had three in one ride. Had a SAG so not catastrophic but had me rethink the CO2 I was carrying for years. Second ride after switching to the minipump (fits fully inside jersey pocket and is lighter than my former CO2/cartridges) I hit several sabotaged stretches of road seeded with roofing nails. Houston, Texas - you get used to this shit. Maybe it was just construction but I doubt it. Anyway, would have been stranded after using all of CO2 instead of just delayed repeatedly.

    Also, a line from the article sticks with me. "Every item has been selected for a function". No one would ride with an allen wrench that is only good for "3 turns", why ride with a pump that is? Weight isn't an issue anymore and size almost isn't.

    As always, though, if CO2 makes you feel pro and makes you ride more, never switch to a minipump.

  • @Calmante
    No flats for that long??!!?? I wanna live where you do. They must do a fantastic job of getting the broken glass and radial tire wire off the shoulder.
    No matter what tyre, tube combo I use, I seem to flat about twice a month. More this time of year which is a bitch; working off a flat with frozen fingers in the pouring rain.

  • @Ron

    I know everyone has an opinion on this, but a little trick I use is to carry a master link/power link/power lock that fits that chain (I use the same chains on my two main road bikes), taped to the inside of my tire lever. If I break a chain I'll just install the master link and limp home. Haven't had to do it, thankfully. Sorry to read about your mishap. This obviates the need for a chain tool or the insanity of trying to rejoin a chain roadside, with sweat or rain or snow in your eyes.

    Catching up, so sorry if this has been covered, but I'd take this option over a chain tool any day. Its a nice, small, elegant solution that will get you home in a pinch and keep your kit nice and light. I'll certainly pick one up, though I'll probably grab the ConneX, not the SRAM.

    Oh, and I also carry my whole wallet on each ride...Never know when you'll want to check a book out from the library on the way home!

    Gold!

  • What the appropriate post, especially after this week's mechanicals...

    I have never, ever broken a chain on the road in 30 years of riding (MTB is a different story). So some time ago, the chain breaker migrated out of the kit for some odd reason. Poor shifting on my part, under quite a bit of force, and one of the link plates popped off. Luckily the VMH was available to take the call. But standing outside in the +15F, breezy air, waiting 30 minutes for her arrival was a lesson I'll not soon forget.

    Only 36 hours later, I flatted on the way in to work (only my second flat in 2.5 years here in Germany). It was 4km from the office, so I decided to limp it in instead of trying to swap it out in the dark, windy, +07F morning. Get to the office, only to discover that the tire levers had migrated elsewhere. WTH!?!?! Luckily VMH was available to get me home that afternoon.

    Complete rookie moves. Two times in one week. Time to regain focus.

  • Road Id on wrist, iPhone to call the team car/take photo/number of passing VMHs. Isn't that all anyone needs?

  • @Gianni

    @miniondone it. No crash, wore off some tyre tread. Now I keep my hand touching the seat stay so it doesn't drift toward seat tube and trouble.

    Yep, me too. Resulted in me with my hand jammed down between the seat tube and tire, skidding to a stop. It's only ever happened once though due to a moment's inattention.
    Trick is to hook your thumb around the seatstay.

    This leads me to a question for @Oli.
    Back in about 1982, when I first started racing, I did a ride with a local ex semi-pro who had done some racing in Europe and in Mexico. He had these devices that were fixed to the frame through the brake bolts that consisted of a crescent shaped bit of metal that supported a fine chain (like fine necklace weight and size) that in theory kept the tires clean and prevented flats. Have you ever seen anything like that?

    Casting my mind back, He had the most beautiful red Colnago Mexico with chromed lugs. I wish I could remember his name.

  • @Gianni
    Baking Sun or Torrential Downpour - it's always one or the other when your stuck. yep I agree, I'm going with a nice sexy mini pump from now on. Cannisters would seem to be useful under race conditions but otherwise I think I'll make the effort to pump. Plus when they go off, they go off - Jesus H Christ! nothing like carrying a potential bomb in your back pocket

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