La Vie Velominatus: The Toolkit
Even as a Pre-Cambrian Velominatus, the rusty wires in my brain must have made the connection between my machine’s aesthetics and the lack of a saddle bag; I can’t remember a time when I rode with a European Posterior Man Satchel. But riding without a saddle bag means the tools go in the pocket, and that means great care must be take in their selection; it has taken the better part of 30 years for my toolkit to evolve to the point where it is today: a minimalist set of highly reliable tools, each carefully selected for its function, form, and weight.
In addition to the endless cycle of tools that have come in and out of the kit, their locations have changed over the years. I’ve spread them across all three pockets, careful to distribute the weight evenly. I’ve put the heaviest items in the center pocket and kept the lighter ones in the side pockets. I’ve put all the weight in the side pockets and kept the center pocket free for stuffing with other items. I’ve ridden with minipump, with CO2, with minipump and C02. I’ve strapped the pump to my seatpost (we can’t all be genius all the time). I’ve carried two multi-tools, I’ve carried loose allen keys. I’ve carried chain tools. I’ve carried multi-tools with integrated chain tools. Suffice to say, nearly every conceivable permutation has been tried.
Before I go on, I want to make a point very clear: here we are wandering deep into Velominatus territory. Every item has been selected for a function, but that function is presupposed by the notion that our bicycles are meticulously cared for and we do not expect to make major roadside repairs. Punctures, silencing a creak or rattle, making a minor shifting adjustment, straightening a handlebar, or tweaking a saddle are the types of repairs within the scope of what may be expected mid-ride. Broken chains, snapped cables, broken spokes, handlebars, or saddles are failures that are to be preempted before departure and if they happen during a ride, one is expected to limp home or find alternative means of transportation. If going on a longer ride with no bail-out, one is to adjust their kit accordingly to account for self-reliance.
I also realize that I’ve now jinxed myself for tomorrow’s Cogal. (But I said it ironically, so I think I’m safe.)
The following considerations factor into my kit selection (in no particular order):
- I used to carry two (or more) spare tubes, several Co2 canisters, and a mini pump. I’m not sure exactly how many punctures I was expecting to have during my rides, but I am sure I was prepared for them. That fact that I rarely flat never figured heavily in my planning.
- Patch kits have gone from being big clunky things complete with a tube of glue that smelled alarmingly good when opened, to small things you’re more likely to lose than to notice you’re carrying it.
- Minipumps have become very small and very light, while still providing enough pressure to get you home.
- C02 chucks have gotten small and light, and are reasonably inexpensive.
- C02 canisters are similarly inexpensive, and based on how frequently I use them, do not seem an unreasonable investment.
- Loose allen keys are ungainly and can be lost; a screwdriver even more so.
- Most of the critical bolts on a bicycle take either a 4mm or 5mm allen key; a screwdriver head is similarly critical as sometimes a derailleur stop needs to be changed. 3mm or 6mm keys are rarely required.
- Tools are heavy, and the aggregate weight of the toolkit can be significant. Take care to find lightweight, compact tools (that still function well) and you can dramatically reduce the weight you carry with you.
- Latex tubes are significantly lighter and more compact that standard tubes.
- iPhones are wicked rad, but Steve Jobs was clearly not a cyclist. Those things weigh like tanks.
Nirvana is a state we cannot hope to reach, though La Vie Velominatus may carry us to its outer boundaries. That is where I feel I am today when it comes to my tool kit, the contents of which are the Lezyne V5 Multitool, Lezyne Trigger Drive, Lezyne Smark Kit, two Lezyne Alloy Levers, two 12g Co2 cartridges, my phone, cash, ID, and inhaler (like most Pros, I’m asthmatic). I organize my kit into separate small plastic bags, but do not store the lot in a Rule #31 Sack, like many of my esteemed peers. Instead, I opt to keep things stored separately in my center jersey pocket, such that I am able to pull items such as my phone or multitool out of my pocket (while riding) without needing to remove everything else with it.
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@silkrider
There are tubeless set-ups for road bikes offered by Hutchison, Maxxis and the like, but they aren’t very popular yet. Traditions die slowly and current product offerings are fairly limited. For me the benefits of tubeless on my mountain bike is lower tire pressure and no pinch flats. On road tires I think that weight savings will be pretty minimal and lower tire pressures certainly don’t have the same advantages as off-road. It appears to be a solution in search of a problem.
@chiasticon
Never! Lay it down on the non-drive side or learn to stand it up on the curb using your pedal. Derailleurs are pretty delicate pieces of equipment and alignment is crucial- avoid putting any lateral loads on it as it is not designed to take force from the sides and you can knock your derailleur hanger out of alignment pretty easily.
@chiasticon
I agree completely.
When riding a local climb in 35 degree Celsius conditions recently, I reflected how glad I was that I had used my EPMS and only a banana was in my pocket. I enjoy “dancing on the pedals” as much as th next guy – why should I do it with all my luggage on my person in those conditions?
Also, I think rider size dictates the position. I, for one, will never fit a phone, tube and tools in my middle pocket without looking like a pack mule, my 65kg 5′ 11″ frame doesn’t allow that. But I’ve seen a few Clydes who can fit two tubes and more in one pocket. Remember, jersey pocket sizes are not universal.
@frank
Nah, I still use a seat bag at times. I don’t let The Man tell me what to do!
@Calmante
I applaud your candor, sir.
I just realized that although I’ve commented on this thread three times, I haven’t said what I carry: spare tube (2 for longer rides), Park multitool, levers, phone, old expired driver’s license and some ca$h. I also carry a minipump (but I FRAME MOUNT IT!) The Oracle-mounted stuff fits in one pocket, leaving room in the others for excess clothing, food, or cycling glasses.
@Anjin-san
i didn’t think about the lower air pressure, you make a ton of sense on that. i was thinking a tire with sealant, no tube, full air pressure, you don’t have to carry tube and pump/air.
@TommyTubolare
In regards to the chain tool;
I found that removing the handles by screwing/knocking them off and use the hex keys as the substitute handles.
@silkrider
There are a few benefits to road tubeless: no pinch flats as there is no inner tube, 90% of regular flats are sealed before you know its happened, better cornering as there is no inner tube and lower tire pressure may help grip in the corners. The paranoid do carry a pump and spare tube for the time the sealant cannot fill the hole or lets out too much air.
I’m speaking from no personal experience. There are road tubeless users on the site (@Marcus runs them) and I will be one when I buy either some Campa Eurus or Easton tubeless wheels. I have my Hutchinson tubeless tires curing in man-cave.
@frank
:) have to go +1 with clips_and_straps. energetically, it is more favorable to have the bike carry as much of the weight as possible, as low as possible. but more important is safety 1st – you really don’t want to risk landing on your tools. i like to wind up a sprint over the top of most climbs. any stuff in the pockets becomes a liability – made worse when the jersey is unzipped. dunno guys, style pts are nice but they probably should go lower on the list. ever seen what hampsten rolls on? replete with seat bag, handle bar bag and a frame fit. and that guy just flies like the wind – that’s where the bona fide style pts are at.
@chubster
Hmmm… Do you even know which site you’re posting on?
@chubster
The point is to be selective of what you take with you. But things that are light weight. Unless you are down to racing weight I don’t see how half a kilo kit is goin to chane the way you and your bike handle. Honestly the kit I take with me weighs less than the leg and arm warmers I stuff in my pockets after it warms up. And those things combined are not very noticeable. But my bike looking tits sure is.
@Gianni
I have tubeless-ready Ultegra wheels on my new #2 bike De Rosa (think Shimano is bad on the Italian bike? It has a Rival groupset, plus I have Look pedals and Time shoes – I’m going to hell).
It’s sitting in Melbourne waiting for me to go ‘home’ for my annual June/July ‘summer’ holidays. I’m not sure I’ll set them up for tubeless, though. Chances of puncturing are fairly high in Melbourne in June, and I’m keen to use the bike time for riding rather than tinkering when I’m on break.
So blah blah – just chiming in that I’ve got a set of tubeless wheels too.
@frank
after riding for a year or so sans EMS (mainly based on what i’ve read on this site), i recently went back. so nice to pack it with what i need and forget about it. no filling my pockets each ride, no forgetting shit, nothing competing for pocket space with my flask(s) of grain liquor.
with that being said, couple of thoughts on your tool kit: no need for two tire levers, ditch one. no need for two CO2s, ditch one. not sure what that patch kit is for, but you can probably get rid of that too. boom, just saved you another couple of grams. feel free to thank me later.
@chiasticon
Good post, welcome! What we all know is that the EPMS isn’t a convenient way to carry stuff on your bike, it’s a mental canker that lives in your brain and flares up every time you get on the bike. I see the appeal of using one, and on commuters/winter/rain bikes, that you don’t show off with, then they have their place (not all the rules can be followed all the time: none here have achieved that state of cycling Nirvana (yet)For special occasions and throwing down on internet forums, the EPMS is retired to under the bed with your other dirty secrets.
@sthilzy
You’re a genius. I’d offer you my third wife to impregnate so i had at least one smart kid if a) I was married and b)I was a polygamist. That is one of the best mods I’ve seen anywhere.
@Calmante
Nice! I liked that cos I do something similar. I steal SWMBO*’s hair ties, thread a key onto it, and use it to hold a pump, that little Lezyne tool Fhroank has, a single tube and a patch kit. I pick up one thing put it in one pocket and be done with it.
(She who must be obeyed – obscur reference to Rumpole of the Bailey, an old english satire)
I’m a 30 year cyclist, ex-Euro semi-pro et al but for my first post on your respected and revered site, I have to completely disagree with your approach to carrying repair kit and to Rule #32. Jersey pockets are for the sole purpose of stashing food for the 5 hour ride, a wind/rain jacket for the descent and unpredictable weather – and that’s fuckin IT. Have you tried to sprint with all that other stuff banging around in your pockets, let alone suffer the hours of a multi-tool digging in your back. Seems like you must like that.
No self-respecting rider is going to hang a bag off the saddle, I am not saying you should but the smallest under saddle kit is totally acceptable. One tube, a repair kit, tire levers, two CO2’s and inflator. DONE. If your bike is in top shape, no tools required. If you have a mechanical on the ride, push on to the next village, use your charm and fake a foreign accent and borrow what you need. It’s your fault for not having your bike in top shape.
Phone and money are the only extras in the pocket. I rode on tubs for many years, spare under the saddle wrapped in a cloth with a frame pump, as did Sean Yates and Allan Pieper. Today’s ultimate V-Man Hincapie and his BMC team on a “tour-day” training ride last May – all the kit under the saddle, pockets stuffed with the hard man gear. Proof in the photos, nuff said.
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@RedRanger
i’m just being bit of pain – my idea of style pts is climbing past roadies while hauling panniers. i’d carry my zefal hpx too but it doesn’t fit these compact frames. but honestly, there is a valid pt about hurting yourself really bad if you end up landing on your tools, because you carry them right next to your spine. that’s the main reason for bringing this up. let’s be careful out there.
@lifeaftergeorge
Welcome sir, lurk no more. And you make a strong argument. Here is a December 2011 photo of Ryder H’s bike on Maui. He has a tidy kit under saddle and no one is laughing at him.
Excuse my ass in the shot, too lazy to edit it out.
@lifeaftergeorge
Shit! No shoe covers either…this is significant!
So if George has his spare tub, 2 cannisters + inflator, 2 levers and a repair kit in his impressively sleek under saddle receptacle, WTF has he got his pockets stuffed full of? Food and a wind/rain jacket? Those 3 pockets are pretty full eh? So I’d say wind/rain jacket, arm warmers, bars, gels, phone…That leaves cash. Looks like George has about €2300 cash in his left jersey pocket…
@lifeaftergeorge
I believe George is using an Arundel Dual.
I’m afraid I break Rule #32 all the time. I’ve tried not to. I just don’t like that stuff being in my pockets. 1 tube 2 co2’s, plastic lyzene tire lever. Tiny little CO 2 inflator. Lyzene patch kit just in case. Blackburn tiny teeny weeny mini pump SL on the bike. (You can’t even see it I swear). A lyzene microbag was my fave but it wears out, now I have one of those neat fizik clip in’s.
I’ve seen HTC guys training with dura ace clinchers (because who wants to carry around a tubby) and using EPMS. Almost every time this subject comes up someone posts a pic of a pro traing with an EPMS on his bike. I feel like I’m in good company.
@Gianni…you appear to be farting at Ryder’s bike! Or at least in it’s general direction!!
I’m afraid I have to join the dissenters. I too tried the stuffed pockets style but didn’t like it. Mainly because it was ruining my admitted low quality club/shop jerseys. I don’t like plain jerseys but am strict on Rule #17 so something had to give. The safety factor played into it too. I have a saddle bag just big enough to hold 1 tube, and CO2 and mini tool. I don’t need levers with my set up.
@RedRanger
Thanks! Now sorted.
@lifeaftergeorge
All that photo suggests is that as George gets older he, when riding, is starting to resemble an older male goat:
If you’re going to go the goat’s balls route, may as well go the whole hog, or goat, as it were:
Just ‘cos George is doing it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t look like a great big ballsack.
@sthilzy
Nice.That’s a beauty! Very clever modification.
Having said that I hardly ever carry hex minitool and powerlink/chaintool combo on my rides but it works for example when on holidays abroad and where sourcing emergency tool on a road might be difficult.
When you’re out there riding chances of finding somebody with a hex key are higher than somebody with a chain tool so if you are really worried about reliability of your chain you should carry not only a powerlink but a small chain tool as well.
I strongly believe that chances of breaking properly installed chain are very low especially when your shifting technique is good and you avoid cross-chaining gears.
For many years now my ride kit contains spare tubular,one tyre lever and mini pump.On longer rides or when I see my tubes are showing significant wear(especially rear)I’d throw in caffelatex espresso can.On top of that I have an old,small phone,id and cash.
My last puncture on tubie was quite a long time ago and I was 70km away from home.The puncture was small so I decided to continue and stopped twice to pump up my tire.Knowing that I had a leaking rear tire I was fucking pedalling home like there’s no tomorrow resulting in a very nice average.
@Blah
and here’s the rest of the BikeSnobNYC article – always better to cite your sources man
“Apparently you affix your helment-hat to this testicle and then engulf it in the weatherproof scrotal sack that is conveniently contained in said testicle:
…
Truly, the best designs are inspired by nature.”
@paolo
Actually giving Tyler Farrar’s new Cervelo the very close inspection. I never see pro bikes up close so I was soaking it all in.
@al
Cite my sources? I’m being accused of plagiarism in the comments section of a blog. Good lord. As if BSNYC, amazing as he is, invented the damn thing. Or stumbled on it first (a reader informed him of it). Or something.
Obviously, I didn’t take the photo. I freely acknowledge that, and humbly apologise if anyone has been misled.
Please tell: how would citing bike snob help here?
That dude in the Castelli jersey has his saddle soooo low that it’s making my knees hurt.
Judging by the responses, it appears that a serious insurrection is underway against our beloved, esteemed Founder and Keeper. Can you say “heresy?”
@lifeaftergeorge
Man, I can never look at a photo of GH without seeing his unborn twin popping out of his left calf. That vein complex is like something out of Total Recall. I wonder if he’s give it a name?
@doubleR
Don’t worry. I’m sure that he’ll respond as soon as he is back to his castle, after the most awesome Cogal to date.
@paolo
Look Paolo use what you have to use but don’t tell me that carrying a spare tubular is somehow an disadvantage to carrying all the junk you mentioned plus the saddle bag just to fix your flat.So to sum up you ride on clinchers which unfortunately cannot compare in riding qualities to tubies plus you need to carry all that stuff with you and yet you came up with ‘who wants to carry around a tubby’.In what way tubular set up is worse?
In regards to pros with saddle bags on their training camps you should ask yourself a question ‘why the hell they need to use a saddle bag when they have a car with spare wheels following them’.Since training camps are full of press guys marketing works very well and selling useless gear for incoming season is much easier.
And let’s be honest about it- pros or not pros saddle bag on a race bike looks shit and that’s all there’s to it.Use it if you believe in its functionality but it just doesn’t look good.
@TommyTubolare
Where I live and ride we are fortunate enough to have pro’s come train from time to time. Over the last few years I have seen BMC HTC Saxo Bank and some lesser domestic teams out training. In fact they invariably stay at the same hotel and somehow (probably twitter which I don’t use because I am a curmudgeon) everyone knows when they show up. So far when I have seen them training they have not had a support vehicle on the road with them at that time. But hey, that’s just what I’ve seen.
My opinion (for it’s just that) is that carrying a spare tubular is more cumbersome than “all that junk”. Which isn’t really all that much. Also the ride quality might be sublime, for me I don’t want the concern of having to change a tubular out on the road but you know, each to his own.
Your last point is smack on. It looks shit. The smaller the bag the less shit it looks so at least I try to minimize it’s shitness. I try to put that stuff in pockets. I don’t care for it. Overstuffed pockets look shit too I think. I am more likely to break this rule in winter when I carry more shit than in summer and believe me I am trying to work towards compliance just for asthetic reasons. Until I find a permanent solution I am happy with I will continue to keep my tiny little fizik pack. I think in my own case at least the bikes asthetic qualities are completely fucked when this particular rider is aboard anyhow so I can’t make it much worse.
Sorry if my dislike of carrying tubbies offended you. I guess with your SN I should have expected it.
Oh, no! Clinchers versus Tubulars, round #12,427,926.
I prefer clinchers, but are any Pro Tour teams riding them this year?
Just thoght I’d throw this into the mix.
I’m with Gerro on this one.
@paolo
First of all you must be located in a nice area to see pros training.I visited few training camps before and always saw a service car,either directly after a group or parked very near ready to be called if help was needed.
I wasn’t really offended by your comment.All I wanted to point out is that carrying a spare tubie is not really that much more to carry around.We all have choices and I completely understand that to some dealing with tubies is just too much hassle.If I was calling it a hassle it would have been a hassle well worth it.Not many see it in the same way unfortunately and I’m fine with that.Wishing you no flats!
@Calmante
No,not really.I’m not ready for that either and I know what I need to know.Your round number made me laugh though.Ha.
I used a EPMS to get some extra shit to work on Friday morning, forgot to take it off yesterday when out in the pishing cold rain for 25K – fantastic – kept it on today for 90K run, and apart from a bit of clanking on the Contadorian dancing sections, it was fantastic not to have that stuff in my pockets, but just stuck the arm warmers and spare gloves instead, and a couple of gels
Also got a winter jacket witha breast pocket which is class for the phone and cash
I’m defo with the EPMS dissenters now….
@Dr C
Close your eyes and visualise that clanking from behind, the EPMS swinging from side to side… Urgh.
Seriously, I don’t live in a place that you ever need spare clothes and I don’t shed clothes as I ride, again due to climate. Very easy for me to just use pockets. And I love it.
So, we’re all agreed? The consensus is that we either use an EPMS or/and our pockets, as we see fit and depending on our unique needs.
@TommyTubolare
Southern California. We get teams in the Westlake, Thousand Oaks area. Hidden Valley. None this winter though at least of which I have been aware.Dave Zabriskie lives around here somewhere close by and of course in the past we have had some TOC stages. There are some great rides and climbs in the Malibu and Santa Monica mtns.
@Dr C
Welcome to the dark side buwahaahhhaaahh
@Blah
If you get a tiny Leyzene pack or a Fizik clip on it doesn’t move. Indeed the Lyzene mini can barely been seen when the rider is mounted.
@Oli
Agreed! We are like gentle snow flakes. Unique!
@all..I’m not really a dissenter. I want to comply..I just find it difficult.
@TommyTubolare
no no, of course not. never! i meant with a front puncture, you don’t need to lay the bike down. if there’s a soft enough/dry enough ground nearby (so as not to scratch or muddy the fork ends), you can just stand it on it’s fork while you fix it. not so with the back. which is the only reason i ever put my bike upside down. i’d rather do that than lay it down, since it makes changing easier and there’s less chance of mucking up the bike (bar tape and saddle are cheaper/easier to clean).
anyway, i was thinking frank was advocating setting the bike on the derailleur, the same way i’ve described setting it on the fork. which i’m sure he wasn’t. i guess i just see setting it upside down as the safest option; least likely to damage costly components (frame, drivetrain). which would be the most insulting thing to the bike :)
@Calmante
You’re only young once but you can be immature forever.
@Oli
‘Agreed’ from me, sure. As long as we all agree that they look shite on the bike, of course.
@Blah
A+
@Dr C
-1. Fucking chaffed nipples.
@Blah
Jesus FUCKIN’ Christ! Pere Fronk goes away for a day and everyone goes bloody bananas.
You all need to re-read Rule #2, Rule #3 and Rule #29. What else is there to say?!?!?
@Buck Rogers
again A+.
The pro Rule #29 faction is regrouping!