Three things can send me from a deep sleep to sitting bolt upright in bed, gasping in terror. First is the most obvious, which is any dream involving visions of spiders. Second is dreaming of being dragged off or otherwise being aware of impending doom and opening my mouth to scream but having no sound come out. An alternate of this dream is one requiring me to fire a gun in self defense and not being strong enough to pull the trigger, the irony being that boasting that kind of upper body strength would indicate I’m finally at climbing weight, which should normally be cause for celebration. Third is being on a ride with fellow Cyclists and friends, and watching helplessly as they prematurely deploy an aero tuck.
I’ve been seeing this more and more in real life, and when I do it’s like being in a dream from which I can not wake. Would that the Elders on Mount Velomis dispatch the Man with the Hammer tout de suite to anyone who engages in this most egregious of Un-Pro acts.
Pedaling is what makes the bike go. If you wish to add more “go” to the bike, the first thing one should consider doing is pushing on the pedals harder. If that doesn’t work, consider buying a new bit of kit like fresh bar tape, which clinical studies have shown also makes the bike go faster. If you have exhausted all possibilities of purchasing more Go-Faster Kit and are still experiencing unsatisfactory results, one has no alternative but to resort immediately to training and getting stronger. Once this is accomplished, go back to the basics of pushing on the pedals. Eventually, it will work and you’ll go faster.
Under no circumstance does the stopping of pedaling add speed to the bike. The most one can hope for is that through dodgy contortions to reduce the rider’s frontal surface area that the amount slower the bike goes may be reduced somewhat. At any time that the rider has not reached escape velocity, a low tuck combined with pedaling will always be faster than a premature tuck.
The aero tuck is a defensive tactic to be used only after the cadence has climbed so high as to become untenable. At this point an aggressively low and compact tuck may be used to tremendous effect. Sean Yates and Greg LeMond were both known for their insane aero tucks which allowed them to reach speeds of well over 100 km/h. Pedaling at those speeds would requires a cadence of 150 rpm or more and a stroke so magnificent as to be out of reach for any mortal.
The Velominatus is to study the aero tuck at length, including all variations of using the drops or drop-ins should you suddenly find yourself riding in 1990, as well as the tops. Always turn your elbows and knees in as close to the center-line of the bike as possible. Place your pedals at a fairly level position. Experiment with hanging your tush off the back of the bike or your shoulders over the front wheel. Learn how to use the area between your saddle and top tube as a perch of equal parts discomfort and speed. Determine which of these yields the optimal combination of speed and limiting the risk of requiring skin grafts.
It is acceptable to tuck immediately before and during a high speed corner. Once the corner is exited, it is mandatory that the rider being pedaling furiously at once. I might also add that should you wish to coast prior to reaching escape velocity, adopt a Casually Deliberate position on the bike and avoid tucking at all costs.
The following are indicators that you have prematurely deployed an aero tuck.
I implore you to help me stop living my nightmares and only tuck once you’ve reached escape velocity. Your assistance in this matter is most appreciated.
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I was guilty of premature tucking a couple of times yesterday.
At the time it seemed reasonable - running ragged coming down the stretch of a hard ride - seeing that the group wasn't working that hard down the hill (likely knowing that they'd put me in dire straits if they did). I siezed upon the moment to grab 30 seconds of recovery while not losing ground on the group.
In hindsight I can see how pathetic my behaviour was. Thanks for the kick in the ass Frank.
@TBONE
This is well-put. In my youth I let it run up over 100km/hr once or twice, and 80 was a regular occurrence. Now, though, at 70 on my compact rig /sad sigh/ I'm in the drops and freewheeling. Not "tucking," since I haven't practiced that in 24 years. Just in the drops.
To be honest, number 2 bike is that unstable that above 80k my harris is twittering so violently, a Lemond moment is a distinct possibility.
Before number 1 bike gave up on me, I'm not sure I ever cracked 100, but I must have got close. It was a considerably nicer place to be, for sure.
@Joe
Opposite for me, in my youth I couldn't get a bike above 74/k. Then on my Vitali I hit 79k coming down the Mountain Highway in North Van, a pothole ridden road with intersections every 100m or so. Not sure what I was thinking there. My Opus couldn't get above 76k, even with a standard. My Cinelli hit 103k coming down the Chamrousse, a record I have no desire to top. 66k is my top speed in the velodrome. 122km/hr on skis. Also no desire to break that record any time soon.
Not sure if any image of Yates invokes speed or simply intimidation. Regardless, never underestimate the V-power of a Skuut bike...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQosDXp9cHc
Thankfully the Sammy Sanchez Signature tuck (nose of saddle inserted in the rectum, chin planted on the stem) is rarely seen outside of the of the Haute Alpes on proper descents during solo breakaways between three of four Hors Categorie climbs on the day in question. Some things need to remain off-limits to all but a limited group of professionals.
I'm a big fan of the tuck, when it's warranted. There's the wisdom that says that you don't stop pedaling going downhill for rest, however, on a long descent in the bunch, it can be a way to conserve energy. Also, when you're a skinny fuck like me and I'm spun out, it's a good way to stay ahead of the bigger guys who have gravity on their side.
In other news, Fabian is now carrying his bike while walking uphill, looking pensively in the distance. A little too deliberate and casual, if you catch my drift.
http://www.mrporter.com/journal/journal_issue121/1#1
@TBONE
Nah, that article and photoshoot are awesome - its great to see a pro cyclist featured on a relatively mainstream site. I like the quote about how he could never model since his guns won't fit in the skinny jeans.
@VeloVita
Thanks for posting. Good for Faboo - you do have to admit he's a handsome devil. Mind you, pictures 5 and 7 are wrong, just wrong.