Everyone knows that the quality of one’s character is measured by the size gear they can push, particularly when going uphill. It is also a well-established fact that no self-respecting Flemish Pro would ever ride a Compact, no matter what condition their knees are in or how ferocious the gradient. Which, by extension, means that Compacts are for sissies. In fact, a true Flandrian would rather lose their national race than ride a Sissy Gear.

The first time we rode with Johan Museeuw, we were shocked to find him aboard one of his carbon/flax race machines – and a compact chainset. Not wanting to offend an Apostle by suggesting he’s riding his son’s bike, I asked him what he thought of it. “I don’t like it. The big ring isn’t big enough for climbing.”

The standard Flemish chainset is – and has been for as long as the Ancients have tracked these details in their sacred scrolls – either a 53T or 52T outer ring paired to a 42T inner ring. On the occasions when the parcours will see them scaling the Koppenberg or Kapelmuur, the Belgians make a concession and dust off their trusty 41T inner ring in order to shorten the gear by a whopping single tooth. In the mountains or over in Wallonia (the land of savages) where they are far from the prying eyes of their proud public, the Flemish hardman may allow his mechanic to bolt on a lowly 39T ring, so long as no one brings it up at the dinner table. (It is worth noting that in Cyclocross it is standard practice to ride a 38T inner ring.)

Museeuw has never been a grimpeur, not when he was a Pro and not now. On Keepers Tour 2013, we had the opportunity to do several more rides with him, one of which was over the roads of Liege-Bastogne-Liege. It was customary for him to suggest alternate routes that avoided the steep hills, and so it was that he tried to talk us out of riding the Stockeu. We rode up side-by-side, taking our time. As we alternated between pedaling and doing track stands, he asked if I was riding a compact. I feigned a combination of exasperation and insult at such a question and told him it was a Flemish Compact.

“Oh, a 39? Goed.”

[dmalbum path=”/velominati.com/content/Photo Galleries/frank@velominati.com/Belgian Compact/”/]

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • If by any chance a Surrey Cogal happened to be the second weekend in September I'm pretty sure I would be there, from Dubai via Tooting.

  • @Teocalli@ChrisO@Mike_P I had in mind a ride on the second weekend in October rather than September. I know it's getting colder and darker in October but my diary is fucked in September. That isn't to say that the London/Surrey/South East Cogal shouldn't be in September if that is more preferable for everyone else.

    As for a route, I had something like this in mind. It needs a bit of refining but the basics would be London to the Coast, taking in an Olympic loop over Box Hill, finishing with recovery beverages and some food at the Royal Oak in Havant and then a train home.

  • @Chris

    @Teocalli, @ChrisO, @Mike_P I had in mind a ride on the second weekend in October rather than September. I know it's getting colder and darker in October but my diary is fucked in September. That isn't to say that the London/Surrey/South East Cogal shouldn't be in September if that is more preferable for everyone else.

    As for a route, I had something like this in mind. It needs a bit of refining but the basics would be London to the Coast, taking in an Olympic loop over Box Hill, finishing with recovery beverages and some food at the Royal Oak in Havant and then a train home.

    That may work even better. Eid Al Adha holiday is the 14th and 15th of October which means I'll probably come home the weekend of the 12/13th.

    And as I will be there for an extra couple of days above my usual long-weekend visits I won't have to cash in any brownie points by going on a 'bloody bike ride instead of spending time with my children'.

  • @Chris

    @Teocalli, @ChrisO, @Mike_P I had in mind a ride on the second weekend in October rather than September. I know it's getting colder and darker in October but my diary is fucked in September. That isn't to say that the London/Surrey/South East Cogal shouldn't be in September if that is more preferable for everyone else.

    As for a route, I had something like this in mind. It needs a bit of refining but the basics would be London to the Coast, taking in an Olympic loop over Box Hill, finishing with recovery beverages and some food at the Royal Oak in Havant and then a train home.

    This may possibly work for me. I'm in Weybridge, so a bit further up the A3 from @Teocalli.  Not sure I can cope with @ChrisO's perma-tan and racing tuned guns though.

  • For those who, like me, can't do the maths this may help. Anyone using this to justify ownership and use of a compact chainset ...it's still wrong and has no place on a road bike.

  • @Mike_P

    @Chris

    @Teocalli, @ChrisO, @Mike_P I had in mind a ride on the second weekend in October rather than September. I know it's getting colder and darker in October but my diary is fucked in September. That isn't to say that the London/Surrey/South East Cogal shouldn't be in September if that is more preferable for everyone else.

    As for a route, I had something like this in mind. It needs a bit of refining but the basics would be London to the Coast, taking in an Olympic loop over Box Hill, finishing with recovery beverages and some food at the Royal Oak in Havant and then a train home.

    This may possibly work for me. I'm in Weybridge, so a bit further up the A3 from @Teocalli. Not sure I can cope with @ChrisO's perma-tan and racing tuned guns though.

    I should be pretty open.

  • @Chris

    @Teocalli, @ChrisO, @Mike_P I had in mind a ride on the second weekend in October rather than September. I know it's getting colder and darker in October but my diary is fucked in September. That isn't to say that the London/Surrey/South East Cogal shouldn't be in September if that is more preferable for everyone else.

    As for a route, I had something like this in mind. It needs a bit of refining but the basics would be London to the Coast, taking in an Olympic loop over Box Hill, finishing with recovery beverages and some food at the Royal Oak in Havant and then a train home.

    Hmm - most of the route out of London to Box Hill are roads I would not normally choose to ride on......

  • @Teocalli I'm open to suggestions, my brother in law rides down to Havant or Hayling Island from London via Box Hill each year and I've got his route notes somewhere but haven't had a chance to map them out.

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