Velominati Super Prestige: Giro d’Italia
In the 1990 Giro, a relatively unknown cyclist named Gianni Bugno lit the cycling world on fire by winning the first stage, thereby taking the Maglia Rossa. That wasn’t so surprising in itself; what was surprising was that the little bugger managed to hold the jersey all the way to Milan, a feat previously only accomplished by Binda and Merckx postwar, and prewar legend Costante Girardengo.
This all happened in the age before smartphones and social media; while these days a stealth strike on the World’s Most Wanted Dude gets live-tweeted, in 1990 it took until well after I knew Greg LeMond had won the Tour de France before I found out that Bugno had won the Giro. Reading about the feat in Winning magazine, Bugno instantly became one of my heros and went on to cast himself into a bronze statue of Rad by being one of the few riders able to challenge Indurain in the following years. (He also possessed the mental frailty that seems to be common among my favorite riders. There’s something Shakespearean about heros with flaws that I simply can’t resist.)
The Giro d’Italia is just prestigious enough to be the maker of champions. It’s isn’t made up of a downgraded field like the Vuelta, but it also ins’t as popular as the Tour where only the best riders on the best teams seem to stand a chance. Every Giro produces a revelation that goes onto great things; that’s one of the key reasons this is my favorite Grand Tour: the field is strong enough to have serious contenders, but weak enough to let an outsider play. It’s perfect.
Aside from a well-balanced field, the geography of Italy lends itself to a better three week race than do France or Spain. Many European companies are defined by natural borders such as mountains or water, which generally means the mountains and great bodies of water lie at the borders with plains in between. (Or, as is the case with the Netherlands, beneath.) Italy is unique in that it is narrow and has mountainous terrain in nearly every region. Whereas the first week(s) of the Tour and Vuelta feature mostly flat stages suited for the sprinters and little else, the Giro’s first week generally contains several mountaintop finishes. The difficulty of a typical Giro’s first week means that riders who ride strongly there typically fade towards the end, while riders who were weak on the first climbs may come on strong as the race closes down. The result is a tight race from start to finish with regular changes in leadership. Except in 1990. And whatever years those other three guys who did what Gianni did.
This year’s Giro will celebrate the 150th anniversary of the unification of Italy by making strong men cry. Forty major climbs, and 7 mountain top finishes, one of which involves climbing Mount Etna twice. (Welcome to Sicily, assholes. You get to ride up the most active volcano on Earth twice.) I have it on the excellent authority of a man down the pub that Contador is stocking up on extra drugs even as I write this in an attempt to quiet the rattle of his skinny little bones in his spanish boots.
With that we kick off the best Grand Tour of the year, and the first test of our Grand Tour VSP Software. The other VSP editions have been a piece of cake. Grand Tours include free “swapping of the picks” logic whenever a rider in a contestent’s pick list drops out. We have rest day swaps for 2 or 4 points each, depending on which rest day it is. Our system is supposed to handle all of this smoothly and seamlessly. We’ll see.
Read the scoring guidelines, work out your strategy, dope up on clairvoyance drugs (alcohol) and chuck your picks up. As usual, the winner of this VSP edition will earn an “Obey the Rules” bumper sticker and all reader’s points qualify towards the final prize of the free personalized Velominati Shop Apron. If you are inclined to enter, simply post your predictions for the top five placings in the designated area above the posts section, bearing in mind that entry/modification of picks closes at 5am Pacific time on the day of the race. You are eligible to swap picks at no penalty for your picked riders who drop out; rest day picks each come at a 2 point penalty for the first rest day, 4 points each for the second.
Good luck.
I’m very, very excited about this giro.
I don’t know if it’s his slight underdog status, or being contextualized by a more confident (less-likable?) Andy this year, but I’ve really come round to Contador this year. He’s just astonishingly good. Also, the fact that the racers are openly concerned/scared/astonished about the absolute brutality of the course means lots of time sourcing online streaming this month.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Kreuziger
4. Menchov
5. Scarponi
In for a penny, in for a pound. Roll on sleep deprivation and family destruction…
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Sella
4. Rodriguez Oliver
5. Sastre
Damnit, I used a ton of clairvoyant drugs all spring in order to do so well in the Classics! I don’t know if I can handle three weeks of VSP “doping.”
Did you lads see the cyclingnews photos the other day of Cuntador riding some of the mtn. stages/passes? My favorite was him sitting at a cafe eating with teammates…with his earphones in. What an arsehole. “I know you guys are my teammates, but I gotta listen to my music right now.” It reminded me of little bastard kids who are getting carted all over by their parents, yet have the nerve to wear headphones while sitting shotgun in the caravan. Cuntador and little teenage brats, those fuckers.
VSP PICKS:
1. Clenbutador
2. Nibbles Nibali
3. Scarponi
4. The Ruski – Menchov
5. Kreuziger
VSP PICKS:
1. Cuntador
2. Nibali
3. Kreuziger
4. Menchov
5. J. Rodriguez
I am gong to have to meditate on this one. I need some big points. I think Nibali is going to have huge support. I think it will be a race between him and Contidor.
Please note: I can’t actually bring myself to pick Contador as a favourite of mine, as I don’t group him with riders I like right now. But I do want the points. Oh, do I want the points he’s sure to get. If Nibbles is well supported, the Bjarne and Bertie show might not go all according to script this year.
Are there any sprint stages between the mountains this year? Can I stack my VSP picks to take the sprint jersey?
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibbles
2. J Rodriguez
3. Anyone but Contador
4. R Porte
5. Menchov
VSP PICKS:
1. J-ROD from the ROKKIT SKWAD
2. Fingerbang
3. Scarponi
4. Nibali
5. Machado
Suitably tossed up and the cards landed this way. As good as any…..
VSP PICKS:
1. Clentador
2. Rodriguez J
3. Nibali
4. Kreuziger
5. Menchov
My sentimental pick will be Carlos “Papa Tiempo” Sastre. He will finish 15′ down.
I know I know, Bjarne and bertie sounds like Bert and Ernie…
Okay, I read the guidelines but just to confirm – we are picking the top 5 finishes in GC, right?
I guess it’s just a sick fantasy/nightmare that we would be picking the top five for every stage. We’d all lose our jobs & VMHs if we had to make that many picks!
As a point of order: what happens if Contador wins but subsequently has his win revoked and is suspended?
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Vinnie Nibbles
3. J-Rod
4. Iggie’s Anton
5. Da Mench
Subject to amendment if/when I get time to really think about this. Which I probably won’t.
VSP PICKS:
1. Spanish Boots of Spanish Leather
2. Mashi Niblick
3. Jay Rawd
4. ScarfacePony
5. Menacing Denis
ciao bella!
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Purito
3. Denis the Menace
4. Igor
5. Sella
Here’s a great shot from the 1990 Giro. I’d never seen this before.
@Ron
Just the GC, thankfully. Though we will do a few improtu VSPs for bonus points during the race; if there is a cool/exciting stage, we’ll chuck up a VSP for extra points.
@Steampunk
So long as that fuck knuckle doesn’t get suspended before the end of the race, we won’t change anything, as has been our approach with the other editions. We’re predicting the race as it is, as it comes. Post-race offenses don’t come into play.
Not that the UCI has the balls to do anything about it anyway. Just like with Valverde, they’ll let him keep his 2011 results saying there’s been no evidence of doping during these races. Fucking twatwaffles, the lot of them.
BTW, We didn’t do a jersey comp last year and I’m debating whether it has enough value to continue. I may add the functionality to pick points and climbers jerseys before the race starts. Have to finish a few other higher-priority bits first.
This should be a lot of fun. I just wish it was televised here, I will have to watch it online, for a price :^(
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. J. Rodriguez
3. Nibali
4. Kreuziger
5. Menchov
Bring on the Grand Tours! I just wish Cuntador was out so Porte could have another crack at the title.
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibbles
2. Cuntador
3. Menchov
4. J-Rod
5. Kreuziger
If Contador is banned by the CAS he will lose all of his results since his positive test at the 2010 Tour.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Menchov
4. Scarponi
5. J Rod
But if the slimly little Spaniard uses that ghey pistol salute even once I’m gunna drop him like a sack of spuds…
VSP PICKS:
1. The Spanish Steak
2. Denis the Menace
3. Nibbles
4. J Rod
5. Scarponi
Sorry mates, I know you are paid to work for me, but I’m not paid to talk to your during lunch…I’ve got Tesch on here!
VSP PICKS:
STAND BY EVERYONE: Problem with the entry form.
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibbles
2. Rokkit
3. Munched too Much
4. Scarponi
5. Kreutziger
OK – Picks are working again…My picks subject to change as I was debugging…but they may also be diabolically ingenious.
@Oldschooly
Better re-enter your picks.
@G’phant
It’s usually better that way. The more I think about these, the more I just outsmart myself.
Ugh, I hate Contador but I hate being mid-pack in the VSP even more.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Farrar from left field
4. Jackson Rodriguez
5. Kreuziger
It’s a shame Leopard Trek seem to have boycotted the Giro and elected to try and win sprint stages rather than GC! Surely they could have had a crask with one of the schlecks or stuey or gotten Jens into form and had a dig at GC. They will have recovered well enough to be good support for Andy in July.
I would say they have more chance of placing in GC then trying to roll HTC (cav) or Retirement shack (Mcewan or Hunter) in the sprint stages.
1st – 3rd seemed easy to pipck. 4th and 5th were harder – this could be a great GIRO!
Shame Porte will have to be domestiqueing for cuntador with Saxo, I would have slotted him into my top 5 otherwise.
VSP PICKS:
1. Cuntador
2. Nibali
3. Menchov
4. J-Rod
5. Scarponi
Ingenious.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. J. Rodriguez
4. Menchov
5. Igor Anton
Bugno was one of very few rider that could sprint without elevate his arse from the saddle.
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibali
2. Contador
3. Scarponi
4. Menchov
5. Rodriguez
Here goes nothing…
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibbles
2. Pistol Whipped
3. Denis the Menace
4. Scarponi
5. Mucho Machado
@Pedale.Forchetta
How come your number has never gone down even though you post all the time?
Bah I would hate to see Contador win the Giro and then get stripped off in June.
VSP PICKS:
1. Cuntador
2. Nibali
3. Menchov
4. Rodriguez
5. Igor Anton
Richie Porte will fly a little under the radar and they may do a switcheroo like Goss/Cav earlier this year.
Rodriguez is likely to be stuffed from a hectic early season. He’ll be thereabouts but a couple of minutes down.
Menchov – done nuthin’ yet. Won’t have it
2 Italians battling for glory. Nibali has more team firepower.
But how about Di Luca coming out suggesting he’s only “80% as good as 2007”. No shit Sherlock!
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibali
2. Scarponi
3. Menchov
4. Rodriguez
5. Porte
If Farrar doesn’t win here but gets his first Tdf stage, I’ll be ok with that. And Le Mevel is their GC leader. His best (and only?) placing was 26th in 2005.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Scarponi
4. Menchov
5. Kreuziger
possibly changing e-mail addresses?
Can’t bring myself to put Clenbutador in my pick’s. May pay for it later but my own sense of integrity will remain intact…..unlike that person whom I will not select
VSP PICKS:
1. Sastre
2. J-Ro O
3. Scarface
4. Munchoff
5. Niblets
Much as I am loath to pack my pick with Unrepentant Dopers, there is little choice if I am to challenge for the Maglia Rosa
VSP PICKS:
1. Medium-Rare
2. Nibbles
3. Scarper
4. Invisible Denis
5. Fucknugget Di Wanka
I really don’t know…
but that’s ok, thanks god I’m not tetraphobic!
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibali
2. Feillu
3. Sastre
4. Scarponi
5. Rodriguez
I feel I should have Garzelli in there too, but maybe he’s my first reserve if someone drops out.
Like ciclista medio I also would rather forgo the points than have the Beefeater in my team. I don’t want any part of me to be wanting him to win…. it’s visceral innit.
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibali
2. J-Rod
3. Menchov
4. Scarponi
5. Wegmann
I really don’t want clenbutador to win but reckon he can do well. Nibali is a class act, i loved his attacking racing so far this year and reckon this is his time, it should be and the rest of liquigas are looking good. The rest of the top five will be rounded out by the other favourites. I don’t fancy Menchov for the win and Sastre is past his best, a few stage wins perhaps but no GC threat.
VSP PICKS:
1. Nibali
2. Clenbutador
3. Menchov
4. Scarponi
5. J-Rod
You think this years giro is bad? Look up the Stentaria. They want that mountain in 2012. Gradients up to 28(!)%. And there is no tarmac on that mountain…
VSP PICKS:
1. Alberto Contador
2. Igor Anton
3. Joa-Clean Rodriquez
4. Denis Menchov
5. Roman Kreuziger
Here comes the defending champion!
VSP PICKS:
1. The Spanish Steak
2. Nibali
3. Anton
4. Menchov
5. Kreuziger
This time last year we were about to head over there. Where it rained for nearly the whole two weeks. Still had a ball.
If you ever get the chance to go, just do it.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. J Rodriquez
4. Menchov
5. Visconti
The pink Moser that Bugno is on gives me wood.
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Scarponi
4. Menchov
5. Sastre
VSP PICKS:
1. Contador
2. Nibali
3. Kreuzinger
4. Scarponi
5. Sella