Velominati Super Prestige: Giro d’Italia 2014

Johan Vandevelde wears a snow helmet on the Gavia during the ’88 Giro.

For the simple reason that the Cobbled and Ardennes Classics are behind us, I have not alternative but to get back on my soap box about the Giro being the best of the three Grand Tours. Well, usually, at least. Last year’s race sucked the big one (even if it was supremely Rule #9), but for the most part it is the race that is the most closely contested of the three. There are mountains everywhere Italy meaning there are less bunch sprints, the weather is completely unreliable, and the slightly lower calibre of rider seems hungrier. Or maybe the reduced pressure means riders aren’t quite as stressed out and are able to funnel that extra energy into the race.

My favorite Giro is a hard one to pick out, but its either the 1988 Giro when Andy Hampsten took the win after freezing himself stiff with Erik Breukink on the Gavia or when Pantani took his in 1998. I’ve been watching the ’98 Giro during my morning turbo sessions and Merckx-oh-me, that was an All-Drugs Olympics nail-biter. ’98 is also an interesting contrast to ’88; in just a decade, the technology had changed so much but more than that, the doping atmosphere in the sport transformed completely. From Hampsten’s Giro, EPO went from just being dabbled with on the fringes to being abused by leaders and domestiques alike by the time Pantani won. Hampsten wrote a nice piece about racing against dopers in Tyler Hamilton’s book, The Secret Race. He described the various side-effects that the popular drugs of his era had, such as bloating and a tendency to make the user over-estimate their abilities. Amphetamine made the riders do stupid things, cortisone made them retain water, and steroids made them heavy; a clean rider could use those factors to their advantage. A far cry from the rocket fuel that allowed humble domestiques to big ring up major alpine passes.

Why am I talking about drugs? There’s a race starting in a few days, people! This is our first Grand Tour, and the picks are worth more points, not to mention that strategy starts to play into things with the chance to swap your picks out on either of the rest days – at a certain point penalty. Remember that points are not accumulated; the standings on the last day of the race are what kinds, so keep the long game in mind.

Any points you win count towards the overall prizes plus the winner of this event also gets to post for the rest of the year in the pink jersey badge. So check the start list, review the VSP Grand Tour Scoring Guidelines and get your picks in by the time the countdown clock goes to zero at midnight PDT on Friday, May 9th. If you think we mapped one of your picks wrong, use the dispute system and we’ll review it. Also remember to be precise enough in your description so we know which rider you mean; in other words, if you enter “Martin”, we will use our discretion (read: wild guess) to decide if you mean Tony or Dan – and that choice will not be negotiable once the the countdown clock goes to zero. There has also been a recent scourge of people putting a rider in more than one place. Two words: Piti Principle, people! Don’t make me do a bunch of extra programming to keep you from being allowed to submit such an obviously unsportsmanlike set of picks. We will mercilessly clear out all your entries should we find you have attempted this.

Also don’t forget we’ve got three major prizes for the season-long VSP:

  1. First place overall wins a Veloforma Strada iR Velominati Edition frame in addition to the customary VSP winner’s VVorkshop Apron
  2. Second place overall wins a set of hand built CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheelset in a custom Velominati paint scheme laced to orange Chris King hubs. (CR Wheelworks is Café Roubaix’s new wheel goods brand.)
  3. Third place overall wins a full Velominati V-Kit with accompanying custom orange Bont Vaypor+ road shoes.

Good luck, have fun with it, and don’t lose your Rule #43 spirit.

[vsp_results id=”29781″/]

 

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @ChrisO

    @The Grande Fondue

    Some dick spectator in a rainbow jersey nearly pushes Bongiorno into Rogers when they are leading. Bongiorno unclips, the gap forms and Rogers is gone. Can we execute people for Rule #16 violations?

    Just goes to prove that you have to be a total wanker to wear a world champion jersey that doesn't belong to you.

    Anyone on the Zoncolan wearing the rainbow stripes in Lampre kit should take it off until they get home, for fear of some vigilante retribution being visited on their ass. Unless your name is Rui Costa.

    The thing that gets me is that they showed footage of the same guy chasing Rolland and others later on.

    And there was another dick who kept running in front of riders with a GoPro in their faces.

  • @Rhodri

    You get the impression it's been a bit of a hard day when riders seem to be being helped away from the finish line. Who was the rider clinging onto the barriers?

    Chalapud didn't look good when he made it across the line, but I think it was Georg Preidler (7th) who grabbed the rail. 

    Roche's sprint to take 4th was the sprint of a dead man, too - he was throwing side to side like an uncoordinated  BMX rider.

  • The weird thing is that these people make the trek and then sit on the mountain for hours...only to be a total fucking asshole to the PROs. Why? How are those cycling fans?

    I was just on my way home from playing soccer this morning. Approaching a stop sign and a car came up behind me like a jet. I wondered if they were just going to drive through me. (I was taking the lane, as it is a crazy 4 way intersection WITH train tracks). I turned to look and ascertain if they were in fact just going to drive through me. A fucking sporty Subaru...with a bike rack on the roof! That person rides bikes?

    Same thing - why would a cycling fan ruin a guy's chance at a win of a lifetime? Why would someone who rides bikes threaten a person on a bike like that? It's fucking bizarre.

  • I said it before P-R and I've been proved partially right today: some asshole spectator would interfere with a rider and cost him the race. Today, an Italian (presumably) cost his countryman the chance to win a prestigious stage. This is only getting worse and unfortunately, the rise in global popularity of cycling will only encourage clowns to go to races and be dicks so they can watch themselves on highlight reels. Scum.

  • Chapeau to Rogers. Not just for deploying massive V and winning an epic stage, but also for shouting "FUCK OFF" repeatedly at the fucking arseholes who think it's a good plan to run alongside the riders on the climb.

    That cunt in the rainbows should have been dragged to the top on a rope behind a moto and cast from the steepest slope. And that would have been too good for him.

  • @Geraint

    Chapeau to Rogers. Not just for deploying massive V and winning an epic stage, but also for shouting "FUCK OFF" repeatedly at the fucking arseholes who think it's a good plan to run alongside the riders on the climb.

    That cunt in the rainbows should have been dragged to the top on a rope behind a moto and cast from the steepest slope. And that would have been too good for him.

    Drop him from here from my ride today round the Isle of Wight - it was a long way down to the rocks from there......(by the way that's 2 tubs not an EPMS)

  • Missed all the action last night, but sounds like it was all going on... my conclusions:

    Fuck Rogers, I don't know how that piece of shit lies straight in bed at night.

    Spectators are becoming worse, not just for running and interfering, but they leave hardly any road width for the riders to use for attacks or even safe passage. Anyone running alongside should be dragged off the road and beaten.

    Nairo needs a fashion advisor badly. And a conscience after the stage 16 debacle. Hollow win.

    In fact, Pro cycling seems to be getting worse for cheating in ways not just drug-related. I mean, Froome calling for more testing? That's a bold way to deflect suspicion. O'Grady, Rogers, all these cunts lying through their teeth just makes me want to walk away. Take the drugs, but don't take us for fools...

    Rolland is class. Picked him for 4th, and he came through despite my concerns that he may get disinterested. But he's the real deal.

    Think I need a nice mountain bike ride to calm me down!

  • Dammit I stayed up to watch last night's stage and after the dropkick in the WC jersey fucked Bongiorno over, it was kinda boring. Quintana looked like he rode within himself, and really it was up to him to light it up. DOn't know it it was a crack in his armour, cos if it is it's the first one we would have seen, but he really rode himself into shape in that third week.

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