Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Liege-Bastogne Liege 2017

There was a time when this is what Cycling looked like.

This guy. This fucking Valverde guy. How can you make it look so easy? Dan Martin was right to look like a little bitch on the podium, because that’s exactly what Valvecap made of him: his little bitch.

What kills me about him is he looks totally awesome, but I can’t find myself liking him. What’s the matter with me? Looking Fantastic is normally all I need. Maybe its because he’s bald. But that hasn’t stopped me before. Chalk it up to the great mysteries of life.

Liege is a race that’s dear to my heart; my dad and I did it together when I was seventeen and it was one of the greatest rides of my life. It’s a great classic, but today’s era of specialization means we rarely see riders contest the cobbled classics as well as the Ardennes classics. Yet, this year we’ve got Greg Van Avermaet lining up after winning Roubaix in the true Hardman style of Eddy Mereckx or Sean Kelly.

So lets make this happen people: I’m voting for GvA, nearly assuring everyone he won’t be anywhere near the podium. Appologies in advance. You know the drill: get the picks in by the time the clock goes to zero. Good luck!

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frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

dyalander says:

Apr 21 2017 at 11:53 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Martin
2. Valverde
3. Samuel Sanchez
4. Adam Yates
5. Barguil
Buck Rogers says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:04 am
Fucking Malmerde is like every Hollywood actor in the past 10 years. They all look "too good" b/c they are all fucking doping as well--so much H and T in Hollywood these days.

They are aesthetically doping but the looks, for the pro cyclist, are the secondary benefit.

I hope that Malmerde gets dropped like a bad habit (which means that he'll pro

bably win b/c it seems that no one ever drops a bad habit, eh?)

VSP PICKS:
1. Dan Martin
2. Kumquatski
3. Malmerde
4. Albasini
5. Henao
Phillip Mercer says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:12 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Alejandro Valverde
2. Michael Kwiatkowski
3. Dan Martin
4. Rui Costa
5. Greg van Avernaet
Phillip Mercer says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:13 am

Stupid typos
Brett says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:27 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Don't Dream It's Over
2. Hungry Like The Wolf
3. Bad Shit
4. Killer Kowalski
5. Henry Mancini Albasini
stooge says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:33 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Valverde
2. Kwiatkowski
3. Rui Costa
4. Martin
5. Albasini
eenies says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:38 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Malmerde
2. Kawasaki
3. Dan Martin
4. Bling
5. Albasini
Buck Rogers says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:43 am
@Brett
VSP PICKS:
1. Don’t Dream It’s Over
2. Hungry Like The Wolf
3. Bad Shit
4. Killer Kowalski
5. Henry Mancini Albasini
Ha! Fucking great names! The espresso must be flowing well there, Mate!
RobSandy says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:44 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Valverde
2. Martin
3. Kwiatkowski
4. Van Avermaet
5. Albasini
hhbiker says:

Apr 22 2017 at 12:49 am
Holds nose, presses submit...

VSP PICKS:
1. Valverde
2. Martin, Danny boy
3. Kwiatkowski
4. Bardet
5. GVA