Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Olympic Road Race 2012

Grewal, legally doped to the gills, takes the win ahead of Canadian Steve Bauer.

You can all wave “goodbye” to your Post GT Depression Syndrome, because the Men’s Olympic Road Race is only three days yonder. I don’t typically give two shits about this particular event; while contested by national teams, unlike the Worlds it appears as just another one-day race on a calendar filled with events that carry much more historical and nostalgic significance. What’s worse, it seems the brilliance has faded from the flame of Olympic Spirit – after all, what is an international sports rivalry without the associated political Boggie Dance of Political Superiority? Merckx, I miss the Cold War.

But this time is different. Contested in London over a route that may or may not favor the squat little speed demon Mark Cavendish, the Cycling world has been abuzz about whether his presence on Team Sky alongside Pippi Longstockings implies his impending doom or his certain success – because everyone knows those are the only two possibilities. Be that as it may, the route boasts to be lumpy enough for breakaways or small field sprints, which makes this particular Velominatus, for once, really excited to see what happens. Oh, and as a special request to the riders, if we could keep everyone off the juice this time round, that would be peaches and creame.

With that, check the start list and pretend like that is going to help you make your predictions. Then look at the route and do the same before making a wild guess and hoping you come up good. One-Day VSP rules apply; get your picks in by the time the countdown timer goes to zero and pray for daylight.

Good luck.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Jonny says:

Jul 29 2012 at 2:56 am

@all re the nature of the race

My £0.02 on Cav's comments are that's he's not as eloquent as David Millar but they're saying the same thing (Millar isn't so specific), i.e GB's plan was well publicised so everyone else's job was to 1) neutralise the GB effort & 2) win. Most teams seemed to have a handle on 1) but not 2). That said, perhaps GB should have marked the Nibali group or the combined breakaway group to change the dynamic; it might be fair to say they had no plan B (hindsight is wonderful). More positively, it's a massive compliment to GB cycling that they were seen as the team to beat.

@all re the structure of the race

Was having the same discussion with the chaps from my club, especially about the medals. Perhaps, as you've suggested, the format of the event should change - must field at least two riders to be a team, hold it over 4 days to test specialisms with a climbing stage, a sprint stage, a one day classic style stage and a team TT. All team members get medals if the team wins overall but no medals for stages, instead points towards the team win?
sthilzy says:

Jul 29 2012 at 3:09 am

What did Cav want? A Reckshaw?!
graham d.m. says:

Jul 29 2012 at 3:58 am

@Jonny

@all re the nature of the race

My £0.02 on Cav's comments are that's he's not as eloquent as David Millar but they're saying the same thing (Millar isn't so specific), i.e GB's plan was well publicised so everyone else's job was to 1) neutralise the GB effort & 2) win. Most teams seemed to have a handle on 1) but not 2). That said, perhaps GB should have marked the Nibali group or the combined breakaway group to change the dynamic; it might be fair to say they had no plan B (hindsight is wonderful). More positively, it's a massive compliment to GB cycling that they were seen as the team to beat.

@all re the structure of the race

Was having the same discussion with the chaps from my club, especially about the medals. Perhaps, as you've suggested, the format of the event should change - must field at least two riders to be a team, hold it over 4 days to test specialisms with a climbing stage, a sprint stage, a one day classic style stage and a team TT. All team members get medals if the team wins overall but no medals for stages, instead points towards the t

@Marcus

@frank

@G'rilla

Impressive to see Phinney finish 4th, and promising to see how disappointed he was to miss the podium. He has the hunger for victory and will hopefully unleash something special in the TT with Cancellara gone.

And nevertheless infuriates ting to see him looking around like a Hincapie in the final 5 km whe he should have chasing with Gilbert or Gesink to close it down and have a chance for fucking Gold.

I will never in my life understand the mentality where one hedges their bet in order to take third when they could go all in and take gold.

Third is meaningless. The only place that matters is first. The rest is just different grades of losing.

bullshit Frank. Achieving your best is the measure. Otherwise losers like us wouldn't try things like your half-arsed little mountain climbs.

I agree Marcus, by that first place only measure, I should simply go in a hole and die. My best is all have have. At my crapbag level this is the most I can hope to attain. But I also agree, with you Frank that if you are there, at the Olympics, then why would you ever play for third. They stated that Phinney skipped le Tour to train for this moment.....then at least give everything and either win or blow up because at 4th you may as well been 14th or 40th, while knowing you took a real shot at the win. I'd rather be a glorious loser, imploding in a ball of fire, then a safe 4th....in the imploding scenario I guess I would thus, even with "worse" results, I would've achieved my best. I
cantona says:

Jul 29 2012 at 4:30 am

Re: first place,

I think the olympics are the only time when that isn't true. Nobody cares who finishes third in Paris-Roubaix, but in the Olympics, third place gets a bronze medal. That's a big deal. Winning an olympic medal of any colour is a big deal.

Re: Vino,

I am still a bit surprised at the amount of support he gets around here. This is a site that is supposed to espouse the virtues of cycling, where people preach the love of the entire culture of the bicycle. Vino put the sport through some of the darkest days that it has gone through in the modern era. His actions made much of the world give up on the sport and decide that it was basically horse racing, where the best-doped animal won the race. I can't forgive him for that, and as much as he rode a great race, I just really wish almost anyone else had won. Now let's hope he doesn't test positive....
TommyTubolare says:

Jul 29 2012 at 5:18 am

@cantona

Disagree.Speaking of cycling I would take Paris-Roubaix third over some fucking bronze medal in the Olympics on some course in England any fucking day.You gotta be kidding though.We're talking cycling and Paris-Roubaix is what it is.Bronze on the Olympics is good enough for some cycling fans in GB who jumped on racing for the trend of it and don't know where Kazakhstan is and blame the whole world for not winning.

Plus Vino got caught and that's it.Bad fucking luck.You think if the winner was someone who never got caught it would somehow be more worthy?
cantona says:

Jul 29 2012 at 6:17 am

@TommyTubolare

First off, I'm not English, nor do I live anywhere in GB, so let's get past that bit.

Second, I too would prefer third in PR to a bronze, but what I meant to say is that there is an award for third in the olympics and that's a big deal.

Third, yes, I think it's a better win if won by a non-doper. If we disagree there, so be it.

Now calm down and enjoy your sunday.
TommyTubolare says:

Jul 29 2012 at 8:09 am

@cantona

I'm calm and I never said you were English however I'm perfectly fine if you are.It's about cycling and not where you from.I didn't answer to challenge you but to point out that in your post PR looks like a joke race which it isn't.Since you also prefer third in PR I really don't understand your post and your overreaction.Lovely Sunday likewise.
Dan_R says:

Jul 29 2012 at 11:50 am

@Cy clops it has nothing to do with Bauer's second place either. Gaywal was just the superdouche of the era.

@Dan_R

All I know is I can't stand that picture grewal ahead of Bauer.....

It looks gheyer than two cocks touching.
Marcus says:

Jul 29 2012 at 5:18 pm

@cantona

Re: first place,

I think the olympics are the only time when that isn't true. Nobody cares who finishes third in Paris-Roubaix, but in the Olympics, third place gets a bronze medal. That's a big deal. Winning an olympic medal of any colour is a big deal.

Re: Vino,

I am still a bit surprised at the amount of support he gets around here. This is a site that is supposed to espouse the virtues of cycling, where people preach the love of the entire culture of the bicycle. Vino put the sport through some of the darkest days that it has gone through in the modern era. His actions made much of the world give up on the sport and decide that it was basically horse racing, where the best-doped animal won the race. I can't forgive him for that, and as much as he rode a great race, I just really wish almost anyone else had won. Now let's hope he doesn't test positive....

Think it is pretty selective to lay the blame of cycling's "darkest days" at Vino's feet. He had a lot of company. Seems like he gets pilloried more than most because of his demeanour and because of his successful comeback. Trust you were similarly aggrieved when Virenque won his later dots, when Millar won races (of far lesser stature than his doping days), when Basso won the 2010 Giro, etc etc?

I would prefer a racer who does what he does on the road (keep in mind everything you ever hear from Vino is translated - and he aint an effusive guy) rather than a loudmouth ex-doper who only found a conscience once when he was caught (yes, Millar).

In my experience, this site is pretty agnostic about doping - you need to take all riders at face value unless they are caught - otherwise you may as well stop watching.

And yes, Merckx tested positive and never apologised either. So there's that to think about.
pakrat says:

Jul 29 2012 at 6:06 pm

@eightzero

What we have in Olympic road cycling now is...meh. Crikey, the only excitement to this race was in that it was *The Olympics*. Sure, generally the best riders all there, but I gotta say there are stages of the Grand Tours that were a buttload more interesting to watch.

Personally I loved the race for the lack of race radios. I woke up at 3 am to watch it live and see what the likes of Faboo and Gilbert were going to try. Start to finish I loved it. The fact that every rider to the man said how hard the race was is proof to me that race radios have ruined racing. Nobody knew who was where and they all cooked as a result. Who the f*** wants to watch 4+ hours of racing knowing that a bunch sprint is a near guarantee. Give me a solid argument that race radios improve the race from the fans point of view.

The only beny I can see is that pros can manage their effort to the utmost with radios. Or you have a secret man crush for the Cavster. How many TDF stage wins would Cav actually have without race radios. I had been gaining respect for the man but after his whining after the race (blah blah how come everyone doesn't want me to win)... what a twat. Don't get me wrong, I love a strong sprint finish as much as anyone, it's just the formula w/radios that annoys. How many more stage wins would Cipo have had if breakaways had been controlled by radios. Other than Germany, I thought the other teams had tactics spot on. Who is going to contribute to a bunch sprint knowing Cav is gonna win 8/10 times. Pure gold I thought.