Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Ronde van Vlaanderen 2016

That's a legitimate Pain Face right there.

Everybody knows there are two kinds of cobbles. Big cobbles, little cobbles, grippy cobbles, and slippy cobbles. And when it comes to mastering the stones, no one is better than the undisputed King of the Cobbles, Kenny Van Vlaminck. And speaking of cobble legends, there is a great piece on our friend Johan Museeuw over on Rouleur today.

According to the weather reports, there is going to be wind and rain on Sunday. And if you watched the live coverage of Gent Wevelgem last week, the storm that blew in after the race was wicked intense. And, since I’ve decided not to visit Belgium this year, you can be pretty sure that the weather will finally be rubbish. You’re welcome.

We rode the RVV route (the classic route, not the crap new one) in the wind, rain, and hail a few years back, and it was striking how slippy the cobbles on the Paterberg and Koppenberg are in the wet. These climbs are borderline doable in the dry, and if you need to get out of the saddle for some extra juice, it is going to take some good bike handling to keep from spinning out.

And don’t forget we’ve got wicked prizes on offer; Don Walker is giving a free custom steel frame to the winner of the VSP overall, and Café Roubaix is awarding a set of their CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheelsets to the runner-up. Third place gets a free V-Kit. Boom. So get prognosticating and get your picks in before the clock goes to zero. Good luck!

[vsp_results id=”40388″/]

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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frank says:

Mar 31 2016 at 7:49 am
@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

"Pinchy" is endearing the same way calling the sharks "a bit bitey" in Hawaii is endearing.

@Buck Rogers

Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

VSP PICKS:
1. Seperman
2. Faboo
3. Sagan
4. Tomeke
5. Sunglasses
RobSandy says:

Mar 31 2016 at 7:54 am

@frank

@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

“Pinchy” is endearing the same way calling the sharks “a bit bitey” in Hawaii is endearing.

There are areas of London I've heard friends describing as 'a bit stabby'. Quaint, I thought.
Teocalli says:

Mar 31 2016 at 7:59 am
What do I know - hoping to keep my 1 point average I guess

VSP PICKS:
1. cancellara
2. van avermaet
3. Thomas
4. Stybar
5. Sagan
the Engine says:

Mar 31 2016 at 8:00 am

@frank

@wiscot

Kenny = king of the cobbles? My arse he is. King of the Belgian shrug? No doubt!

You know that’s a pisstake right?

@Gianni

I could hang out with Kenny all day long. Frank tells me he is fun at the bar. Tour of Morocco indeed.

Yes, Kenny saved me from a dingbat Triathlete vendor at the London Bike Show. It was glorious.

It was a work of genius. He was eXplaining thE mechanicals to him also.
the Engine says:

Mar 31 2016 at 8:01 am
@frank
@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

@dinosaurJR

@RobSandy

All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

“Pinchy” is endearing the same way calling the sharks “a bit bitey” in Hawaii is endearing.

@Buck Rogers

Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

VSP PICKS:
1. Seperman
2. Faboo
3. Sagan
4. Tomeke
5. Sunglasses
Which is why I'm doing it with the Pave boys also
Buck Rogers says:

Mar 31 2016 at 8:02 am
@frank

@Buck Rogers

Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

Good to know. Do the Pave' boys do the whole route, every k? I rode the FULL 250+ km cyclo for Paris Roubaix and it was not too crowded and AMAZING! But with RVV having the hills, I can see how it would get backed up.

VSP PICKS:
1. Sagan
2. Sparty
3. Stybar
4. Van Avermaet
5. Tommeke
LawnCzar says:

Mar 31 2016 at 8:21 am
I made the mistake of saying, "oh, Peter will get second" last time. Oh, me of little faith!

The formula for these picks involved a perl script for averaging odds from bookmaking sites, a scan of the picks from you good people, and my own inspiration and studied insights into the greatest sport that humanity has ever sported. Let's see how we do.

VSP PICKS:
1. Peter Sagan
2. Fabian Cancellara
3. Alexander Kristoff
4. Michal Kwiatkowski
5. Greg Van Avermaet
kyle says:

Mar 31 2016 at 9:21 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Sagan
2. GVA
3. Kwiatkowski
4. Van Marcke
5. Stybar
JCM says:

Mar 31 2016 at 9:32 am
VSP PICKS:
1. Cancellara, Fabian
2. Sagan, Peter
3. Vanmarcke, Sep
4. Terpstra, Niki
5. Benoot, Tiesj
TheVid says:

Mar 31 2016 at 9:39 am
VSP PICKS:
1. GvA
2. Sagan
3. Kwiatkowski
4. Spartacus
5. Tommeke