Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Ronde van Vlaanderen 2016

That's a legitimate Pain Face right there.

Everybody knows there are two kinds of cobbles. Big cobbles, little cobbles, grippy cobbles, and slippy cobbles. And when it comes to mastering the stones, no one is better than the undisputed King of the Cobbles, Kenny Van Vlaminck. And speaking of cobble legends, there is a great piece on our friend Johan Museeuw over on Rouleur today.

According to the weather reports, there is going to be wind and rain on Sunday. And if you watched the live coverage of Gent Wevelgem last week, the storm that blew in after the race was wicked intense. And, since I’ve decided not to visit Belgium this year, you can be pretty sure that the weather will finally be rubbish. You’re welcome.

We rode the RVV route (the classic route, not the crap new one) in the wind, rain, and hail a few years back, and it was striking how slippy the cobbles on the Paterberg and Koppenberg are in the wet. These climbs are borderline doable in the dry, and if you need to get out of the saddle for some extra juice, it is going to take some good bike handling to keep from spinning out.

And don’t forget we’ve got wicked prizes on offer; Don Walker is giving a free custom steel frame to the winner of the VSP overall, and Café Roubaix is awarding a set of their CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheelsets to the runner-up. Third place gets a free V-Kit. Boom. So get prognosticating and get your picks in before the clock goes to zero. Good luck!

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frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

John Leddy says:

Mar 31 2016 at 1:32 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Cancellara
2. Sagan
3. Thomas
4. Kristoff
5. Stybar
Iain Taggart says:

Mar 31 2016 at 1:45 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Stybar
2. Vanmarcke
3. Cancellara
4. Thomas
5. Van avermaet
Byron says:

Mar 31 2016 at 1:48 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Fabian Cancellara
2. Sep Vanmarcke
3. Peter Sagan
4. Michal Kwiatkowski
5. Ian Stannard
CJ@178 says:

Mar 31 2016 at 2:24 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Thomas
2. Stybar
3. Sagan
4. Cancelara
5. Chavenel
VirenqueforeVer says:

Mar 31 2016 at 2:57 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Stybar
2. Sep
3. Sagan
4. Fab
5. Roelandts
frank says:

Mar 31 2016 at 4:10 pm
@Buck Rogers
@frank

@Buck Rogers

Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

Good to know. Do the Pave’ boys do the whole route, every k? I rode the FULL 250+ km cyclo for Paris Roubaix and it was not too crowded and AMAZING! But with RVV having the hills, I can see how it would get backed up.

VSP PICKS:
1. Sagan
2. Sparty
3. Stybar
4. Van Avermaet
5. Tommeke
Didn't you do the summertime one? The ones the day before the races, those are shit shows, from what I understand. Gagillions of people.

The Pavé boys will do whatever the fuck you want them to, they have no pride whatsoever. Actually, not true, loads of pride and they will push back because they know the routes and want to give you the best experience for the money/time. But they will do the whole route if you want them too.

We normally do a hybrid route for RVV where we hit all the high points over about 160km (and fuck the new route, we hit the Kapelmuur, naturellement.) Don't forget the first 100km of both Roubaix and Flanders is flat. But you know that if you did Roubaix. Also, the routes always change, so there isn't really a "every km" route that exists.

And Alex will add to the charm by making sure you miss a turn or two and will have to improvise. If we do a Keepers Tour next year, this would be a prime time for you to come over.
litvi says:

Mar 31 2016 at 4:11 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. VAN AVERMAET, Greg
2. CANCELLARA, Fabian
3. SAGAN, Peter
4. KWIATKOWSKI, Michal
5. DEMARE, Arnaud
Two Ball Billy says:

Mar 31 2016 at 5:19 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. Fabian Cancellara
2. Greg van Avermaet
3. Peter Sagan
4. Tiesj Benoot
5. Jasper Stuyven
wilburrox says:

Mar 31 2016 at 5:25 pm
VSP PICKS:
1. SAGAN Peter
2. CANCELLARA Fabian
3. van AVERMAET Greg
4. KWIATKOWSKI Michal
5. BOOM Lars
Buck Rogers says:

Mar 31 2016 at 6:36 pm
@frank
@Buck Rogers
@frank

@Buck Rogers

Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

Good to know. Do the Pave’ boys do the whole route, every k? I rode the FULL 250+ km cyclo for Paris Roubaix and it was not too crowded and AMAZING! But with RVV having the hills, I can see how it would get backed up.

VSP PICKS:

Sagan

Sparty

Stybar

Van Avermaet

Tommeke
Didn’t you do the summertime one? The ones the day before the races, those are shit shows, from what I understand. Gagillions of people.

The Pavé boys will do whatever the fuck you want them to, they have no pride whatsoever. Actually, not true, loads of pride and they will push back because they know the routes and want to give you the best experience for the money/time. But they will do the whole route if you want them too.

We normally do a hybrid route for RVV where we hit all the high points over about 160km (and fuck the new route, we hit the Kapelmuur, naturellement.) Don’t forget the first 100km of both Roubaix and Flanders is flat. But you know that if you did Roubaix. Also, the routes always change, so there isn’t really a “every km” route that exists.

And Alex will add to the charm by making sure you miss a turn or two and will have to improvise. If we do a Keepers Tour next year, this would be a prime time for you to come over.
Right! Good point. I did the Roubaix Cycle Club one in June 2012. This was before they started the whole "Day Before" ones. Definitely would be great to get involved next year, either on a Keepers Tour or, if no Keepers Tour is running, then with the Pave' Boys! Hell, where I'll be in Germany is less than 25 miles from France and less than 2 hours from Belgium! Just a Bunny hop, Pave' skip and a road curb jump from the racing!