Velominati Super Prestige: Paris-Roubaix 2012

VELOMINATI HItS THE COBBLES OF CAPPELLE EN PÉVÉLLE. PHOTO: JESSE WILLEMS

We rode the Pavé of Roubaix in the dry, and any comforting feelings we might have been carrying about with us that suggested we had somehow prepared for them were summarily vaporized as we hit the first secteur. Riding together in a group, unable to reach for the brakes or the shifters, we all were hit with the same realization: these aren’t like the stones we have at home. Not if you live anywhere other than along the cobbled roads of Northern France. Not if you live in England. Not if you live in the Netherlands. Not even if you live in Belgium. And we won’t even talk about the rest of the world.

The Trouée of Arenberg is a sacred place. Arriving there, you feel the need to pray out of respect. Riding there, you feel the need to pray out of a sense of self preservation. There is no smooth path through these particularly rough cobbles. That was in the dry; if the race is wet as predicted by the weathermen (whom I assume are as bad at being right as they are in the States), then there isn’t a bag big enough to hold all the prayers the riders are going to need to get through these. And the Trouée is not the hardest or roughest secteur, by a considerable margin; that honor goes to Mons-en-Pévéle or Carrfoure de l’Arbre.

Keep an eye on the weather report as the race comes nearer, as wet roads will turn this race into one of attrition. Cancellara has broken his collarbone; Boonen, Pozzato, and Ballan are on form. But this is a long race, and details such as those matter little when a race contains over fifty kilometers of cobbles. Is it another year for the breakaway, or will the favorites close it down as they approach the finale? I don’t know, but watch the countdown timer and get your picks in by Sunday morning at 5am Pacific. Winner of this VSP event will earn the right to comment all year with the pavé commenting badge. We will also forgo the usual Symbol Pack prize awarded to a Monument and award the winner a copy of the local newspaper the day after the race.

Bon chance.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • Taking a gamble that BMC will put it all on the line to get Thor out front. Chavanel will be riding for Tommeke but is still looking super strong. I don't expect to see Sky in the top 5 but hedging my bets in case they actually manage to get BossHog in a break. Really though, I just want to see Thor win this thing finally.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Hushovd
    2. Boonen
    3. Breschel
    4. Chavanel
    5. Boasson Hagen

  • @Vin'cenza

    @frank
    What is the make of the "V" face plate stem ??

    Um, I think you are asking about the Dutch Monkey's stem on his #1. That's a Shimano Pro Vibe stem. (I think there is a "vibe" in there.) I rode one for awhile but the grey didn't match properly with my silver bike. I did like the V though.

    Is that actually Big George with the turtle? Arms look to have fair hair; I'm guessing George has black hair. Maybe that wasn't the implication and it was just a joke?

    I'm mistaken for a PRO almost every time I leave the house - people snapping photos, team car behind me, folks scurrying to pick up my discarded bidons. Actually, it can be pretty funny when someone inquires who doesn't know much about cycling and they assume that since you're in full Lycra, you must be a PRO.

  • @Cyclops
    The footage is sweet. Super sharp and stable, and really gives an idea of what it's like to have the shit shaken out of you for hours on end.

  • VSP PICKS:

    1. Tom d'Vlamboonen
    2. Potato
    3. Boss Hog
    4. The Spanish Arrow
    5. Nina Pretty Ballanrina

  • Marko is lookin' mean in those shots! Nice!!

    Very cool dudes, in a set of photos with the PROs. Who was the kid? You letting him sit off the front before shutting him down? Dude is ditching school to ride the pave!

    I love how some guys are bundled up like it's Baltic & others just have on knee warmers & a gilet.

    I also DO NOT understand why some dudes ride bear handed in cold weather or off road/on crazy pave. Who wants freezing hands? Or, who wants to hold your fucking bars during P-R with hands scraped during a training ride crash? I have a friend who does it. "I just can't stand gloves." You aren't doing surgery! You're pushing a damn shift paddle 4 cms left. Oh well, I guess this is personal preference, but I don't get it.

  • Didn't realize there was a Norwegian rider on Katusha. Anyone know what model Carrera helmets they're using? I'm guessing the Radius, but could they be the Razor.

  • So cool that a photographer mistook Frank and Marko (I hope I've got this right) for Pros, it can mean only one thing.

    1 They both look Pro/fantastic.

    Although it could mean that the photographer recognised the revered kit and had to get a shot for his collection.

    Next weekend I'm hoping to get a photo of me and Obree making the sign of Merckx at the Scottish Bike Show.

  • @Ron

    @Vin'cenza



    @frank
    What is the make of the "V" face plate stem ??


    I'm mistaken for a PRO almost every time I leave the house - people snapping photos, team car behind me, folks scurrying to pick up my discarded bidons. Actually, it can be pretty funny when someone inquires who doesn't know much about cycling and they assume that since you're in full Lycra, you must be a PRO.

    In a local Coffee Bean I was asked by the Barista "How far have you ridden?" I said "oh about 50 miles" at which point the wide eyed Barista exclaimed "are you a professional? " which obviously brought a hoot a of laughter from me and I said " Do I look like a professional?" he looked at me and a bit taken aback he says "I have no idea". I'm 5ft 9 and about 190lbs so I think you all can figure that one out.

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