Velominati Super Prestige: Paris-Roubaix 2013

Faboo after dishing out the hurt on Le Carrefour de l'Arbre" src="http://www.velominati.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/photo-1-620x465.jpg" width="620" height="465" /> The Lion cooks up a helping of V-cakes for Faboo after dishing out the hurt on Le Carrefour

It looks so easy on the television. Well, no, actually it looks pretty bloody hard. We think we have some understanding of how they suffer, how their bodies can take the continual beating. But we don’t really know. Not even by riding these abominations they call roads twice in the space of a few days can we understand the scale of the thing. Not even by witnessing firsthand a master of the cobbles effortlessly turning the cranks, cruising past us as if on a cushion of air by comparison to our bed of nails can we fully comprehend what it takes to ride these secteurs with any panache, style or speed.

While we witnessed a Roubaix masterclass from The Lion himself today, a new name could be added alongside his on the long list of legends on Sunday. Or it could be a former vainquer adding to an already impressive palmares. But as we’ve seen in the past, and even the past hours, luck plays as big a part as skill, talent and fitness in this most beautifully horrible race. And it plays an even bigger part in picking the top five in the VSP.

All you have to do is sit back and enjoy the spectacle. We’ll be doing the hard yards at the side of the roads of Troisvilles, the Troueé, and the Carrefour. Study the form guide, then throw it out. It’s no good to you here.

In the meantime here’s a look at a bunch of nobodies and a guru riding a secteur on today’s recon. The lesson comes at around 0.15.

[vsp_results id=”22968″/]

Brett

Don't blame me

View Comments

  • In addition to my VSP picks, I predict that David Harmon will mispronounce every name you could possibly mispronounce and that Sean Kelly will not laugh at a single one of his jokes.

  • @ChrisO

    @Beers

    Oh yes, it was Frank. You can almost see the thought bubble above his head after Museeuw goes by...

    What the fuck? Museeuw? It's go time old man, the monkey is on your ass...

  • I'm sure P-R's lottery will mix things up a bit.  Could have picked five or six others for a place, at least.  Be good to see big Thor do a ride, but I'm afraid he's going to turd...

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara
    2. Boom
    3. Devolder
    4. Phinney
    5. Chavanel

  • I'd like to see Faboo extend his run of form, but I can't help thinking that things happen in threes and he'll end up on his arse again.

    As for the rest - pffft, pure guesswork. I'd like to see Phinney make the podium on V alone, Chavanel should be in with a shout instead of the broken Boonen.

    Good work on that video - strong riding.

    @Frank

    I hope you had the mental capacity left to realise "Bloody hell, I'm chasing down the Lion on a P-R secteur" to keep the pain in your guns at bay. Or was it just pain, pain and more pain?

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Crashacus
    2. Chavanel
    3. Mini Phinney
    4. Terpstra
    5. Boom

  • Will 2 spills in 2 days cost Spartacus? Last chance saloon for Sky classics season? Who knows? All I know is that it'll be the riders with more than a little fortune on their side that triumph in the velodrome on Sunday. Going with the man. Even if he's marked he'll still ride away. 2 Team Sky in the top 5. Stuck in south Poland with a wavering wifi signal. Will be following on twitter unless I find a bar showing Eurosport.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara
    2. Boasson Hagen
    3. Chavanel
    4. Roelandts
    5. Thomas

  • @Fausto

    @Frank

    I hope you had the mental capacity left to realise "Bloody hell, I'm chasing down the Lion on a P-R secteur" to keep the pain in your guns at bay. Or was it just pain, pain and more pain?

    I might have had my best day on a bike ever as far as form goes. I could just accellerate and do what I needed. On a few occasions, Johan and I even finished alone ahead of the group. Getting paid a compliment by the Lion on your riding over the stones is enough to send one into the stratosphere.

  • Fab's luck has run out. Big Jurgen looks the goods after de Ronde, that fucker's taller than Frank and rides a lot less seatpost!

    Stand by for the next video from le Carrefour, you may be able to just see me in the distance dropping Frank, Lion and Cub...

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Roelandts
    2. Davis Jr
    3. Chav
    4. Heiny
    5. Boom

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