Velominati Super Prestige: Paris-Roubaix 2016
Every time I’ve ridden the Roubaix pavé, I’ve peed the next few days like I got VD from some dirty cobble. That might not really sell the non-believer on the pleasure of riding the sacred stones, but there truly is nothing like it anywhere else in the world. Here in Seattle, we have cobbled climbs and they are by all rights legitimately rough. But they pale in comparison to the brutality of the Flemish kasseien, and the Flemish kasseien pale in comparison to the French pavé.
When riding the cobbles, I sometimes find myself almost having an out of body experience, amazed at the fact that bicycle and rider are carrying on in a generally forward progression. On one occasion, I even found myself staring at a bidon that had ejected from my Arundel Mandible bidon cage, which itself says something about how rough the ride was. The bottle seemed to hang in the air for a moment as time slowed and I wondered firstly how the bidon had found its way past my top tube, and secondly whether I should fight the strangely strong urge to try and catch it.
Several of our V-Community brethren are over in Lille as we speak, riding the cobbles with our friends William and Alex from Pavé Cycling Classics and swilling Malteni like fools. They are over there because the thrilling sensation of savage shaking when you hit a secteur at speed from the smooth tarmac followed by the sense of overwhelming relief when the shaking stops as you return once again to the smooth pavement is an itch you have to keep scratching.
Sunday is Paris-Roubaix, the Queen of the Classics. And this time, it really does look like it’s going to be muddy and raining. Thank Merckx. Recall that Tom Boonen is the only favorite in the Peloton who has raced Paris-Roubaix in the wet, in 2002. Fourteen years since a muddy edition. Fourteen.
Will Boonen make it an unprecedented V wins? Or will Faboo come good and tie the record to join Boonen and de Vlaeminck? Or will Pinchy do the double and take his second monument? My money is on rain and an upset winner.
Don’t forget that the VSP Series winner takes home a custom Don Walker and that the runner-up gets a set of handbuilt Café Roubaix CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheels. Third place get a V-Kit. So start your prognostications on the start list, pray to whatever deity that melts your butter, and get your picks in by the time the timer goes to zero.
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@frank
Farrk, that bodes well for Sunday, whats better is it’s live on my free to air TV. Winning !
How do you call this? Anything can happen.
@RobSandy
Yep, agree, it’ll be like watching cat’s on roller skates.
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@Barracuda
Ok, narrowed it down to 7. Crashes and punctures will take half of those.
The question is, really, do you bet against Sagan at the moment? He’s On like Donkey Kong.
Dare I leave Sags out – has not worked so far! Rats I have to work on Sunday.
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Flipping auto spell ! Oh well the pick mapping sorted it.
@RobSandy
My track record is that generally at least 2 of my picks crash and burn. They will be paying me soon not to pick them. So given I have not (yet) picked Sags, he’s on for the win, again.
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My predictions, for what its worth: Between Sky, Etixx and Sagan, the peloton will be shattered. Sagan will ride the majority of the race with no support from his team (whats new) attached to the wheels of etixx….from there he will attack solo and won’t be seen again. He’s gonna thrown his heart into this one folks. Fabs will be not bridge in time.
Or maybe something else will happen….
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Right, I’m going for it. I just can’t bring myself not to write’ Sagan’ in the top box. Winning both the Ronde and Roubaix in the same year would be extraordinary. But that’s exactly what this guy is.
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@RobSandy
I’ve left him out, at my peril I fear,
Stannard could make or break me !
@Barracuda
I can see why you’ve put Stannard in – long, flat, potentially windy and wet race; he’ll still be going strong at the end.
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A bit of bike handling perhaps
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@frank
I’m sorry to burst your bubbles but Ive just got back to Lille after riding Orchies to Carrefour and nothing looked like that. There was heavy rain yesterday but not sustained. The forecast is “chance of rain” but it looks like the odd squall. As soon as rain passes the wind quickly dries the stones. The wind was hellish strong from the south west today. Very damaging. The last stretches of Mons en Pevele and Carrefour were killer. I’d be happy to be wrong but a muddy Roubaix is not looking likely.
Here’s @el franco arriving at Carrefour.
This is it for Tommeke. His last Roubaix. Fabs too. I really, really, really want it to be the big baldy.
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Whats for Sunday dinner? Pavé; Sur la Plaque.
Yummy.
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@wiscot
Has Tommeke finally said that this is his last P-R??? I have not seen that yet but I might have missed it.
I think that unless he finds some magic sauce late in his career (same shit that Museeuw “Only” used at the end of his career) I think that this will be his last shot at a win. He is getting on the old side (although Gibus was late 30’s when he won it twice, right?)
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I’m seeing some very questionable modern lingo and movie choices here. I wish Antonio Fargas could go back in time and prevent Ben Stiller from being born. That guy expired around 18 years ago.
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@Slowtrane
Tony Martin? he’s my basement closet dark horse pick. He’s got the engine, but does he have the ability to be in the front after a day of cobbles? I hope not for the sake of my picks, but it would be amazing to see him turn into a classics racer at the mid/late point of his career.
@Buck Rogers
I don’t think so, but I think we all know that it might well be. I can’t see Lefevre keeping him on at his salary to ride a few classics in 2017/2018.
Duclos-Lasalle was 38 and 39 when he won his two P-Rs so there is form for age and experience doing well in the race.
I’ve a sneaky suspicion, not reflected in my picks, that Big Stannard’s going to romp home solo style.
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@Buck Rogers
no, he hasn’t come out and said it yet…but when asked he doesn’t deny it. someone who isn’t ready to hang up their wheels would probably say so. I think he’s waiting to see if he finishes on a high note.
@hudson
Agreed. If Tommeke wins, I see this being his last year. Wouldn’t it be great to see Him and Fabs on the podium in a 1-2? That would bring a tear to a glass eye that would.
@wiscot
Completely agree that it could be his last year but I was not sure, after your post, if he had declared it like Sparty has. Also agree that if he can manage a win, or possibly even a podium, he might bow out after this year.
But I’m betting that he rides hard one more year after this year, to separate his time from Sparty’s, if nothing else. Maybe even ride in support of Sagan if Etixx can pick him up and help “mentor” him a bit (not that Sagan really needs it at this point) and go for the odd result himself.
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@frank
I think that it’s less the piti principle and gaming the system then a complete lack of ability to spell Belgian names as people figure out their picks, so we cut and paste. Thanks for the reminder!
@Buck Rogers
Aw man! if Sagan got picked up by etixx then the other teams wouldn’t stand a chance. They would be the Boels-Dolmans of the mens peloton. any decent support for him at all would change alot of those 2nd place finishes.
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Picks for PR.
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Off to Compiegne tomorrow….looks like rain almost everyday EXCEPT Sunday. Whether you think thats good or not is a matter of personal opinion but either way Fabian is going to win I can feel it in my bibs. Good luck everyone!
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I’m doubting myself. Mud = Stybar and Boom. What to do? What to do? Boom is talking about leaving the road and going back to CX full time. He is out of contract at the end of the season. A win or a good show would change that and no doubt help his contract negotiations.
And while I want Boonen to show well, I think Stybar is the true captain this week. Maybe Terpstra.
So the tea leaves say what?
They say get back to work. You are procrastinating at your desk.
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@Erik
Boom seemed more prone to excuses than passion in recent races. Passion wins Roubaix. That’s why I put Stybar as my 5th pick- he’s pissed he didn’t win last year, and that team needs a win. I also don’t like Rowe in the mix either because he was “happy” with his Flanders result. That kind of satisfaction will only hurt him.
I will say that the guy I most want to win and is Benoot, if purely because he’s so full of V for even starting this race after his Flanders crash.
@Alex Todo
You still have time to come up with a more likely choice for fifth place.
As for my choices, mostly wild guesses mixed in with what I’d like to see happen. I’ve been waiting for Sep to win a monument for a few years now, but would certainly be happy to see Sagan pull off a cobbled hat trick.
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There was a time when they avoided the cobbles apparently and just took to the fields. Rick van Steenbergen.
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