Ok, ok, settle down now people. Take your seats please. You’re all a little bit on edge, like some cycling Gamblers Anonymous group that’s been let out for the weekend with a pocket full of bills and the name of the nearest bookie. But in your excitement, you managed to crash our server, delaying the fix you so desperately crave.
But wait no more. You’ve warmed up on the gateway races, now it’s time for the hard stuff, as grimy, rough and unadulterated as the roads of Flanders themselves.
You see, there’s this bloke I know who knows a bloke, hangs around the Velominati bike sheds, seems to know a bit about the racing game. Reckons he’s got a sure bet for the weekend. A cert. A dead-set shoo-in. Number 1 in Race 3 of the VSP at Flanders. Fella reckons you could put your left one on it. Absolutely Faboolous or something he’s called. He’s got form (and, judging by the way he shelled the nags on last week’s card, possibly a motor). But word is there could be a late plunge on the other fella, Boom Boom Boy, so maybe a bob each way might be the way to go. I’d watch out for those not-so-roughies though, the likes of Gilbert, Devolder, Ballan and Thor will be waiting to pick up any leftover chaff and could steal away the win, leaving you as frustrated as a one-legged man at an ass-kicking contest.
So what’s it gonna be then? Take the sure thing, or the other sure thing, or throw a dart at the board and hope it sticks? It’s time to study the form guide, search the dark recesses of your soul, throw out any logic, and pencil in your picks on the ticket provided at the bottom of the comments. Whether you’re canny, savvy or just plain tinny, the coveted Obey The Rules bumper sticker is waiting. Is your bumper worthy?
The only thing for certain is that bicycle racing will be the winner on the day.
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VSP PICKS:
1. Farrar
2. Hushovd
3. Fabio
Hincapie - a freight train from hell heading straight up the arse of the competition. This will be his year, I'm certain of it...
VSP PICKS:
1. Hincapie
2. Heinrich
3. Cavendish
4. Roulston
5. Cancellara
VSP PICKS:
1. Spartacus
2. Boonen
3. Gilbert
4. Heinrich
5. Devolder
Great write-up. The wife and I rode the cyclo last year, or tried, our naivete on the cobbles did us in for an official finish... some unfinished business left for us in Belgium. For the lad at the top on the other hand, not so much unfinished business there. Gotta put the last one in there... don't believe he'll be fifth, but gotta cover the bases in the top-5 in case his flyer sticks.
VSP PICKS:
1. Spartacus
2. Boom Boom Boonen
3. The Arrow
4. God of Thunder
5. Shave-an-L
I went basic picks. Cancellara will become Can-Can-Cancellara when he backs up with 3 wins in 3 weeks. The others are pack fillers like myself. It'll have to be a breakaway, so I'm leaving my boy Gossy on the bench this week. Hope he makes me look (more) stupid on Sunday!
VSP PICKS:
1. Cancellara
2. Boonen
3. Ballan
4. Gilbert
5. Thor
VSP PICKS:
1. Boonen
2. Fabio Cancellara
3. Goss
4. Lars Boom
5. Thor
Why not go long? Cancellara has to have a bad day at some point.
VSP PICKS:
1. Chavanel
2. Boonen
3. Van Avermaet
4. Eisel
5. Boom
Ah fuck it I'm just gonna pick who I want to see in the final selection to make it an interesting race. If Devolder has picked a race to win this year, I hope to hell it ain't this one. Can't see him knocking down that door...
VSP PICKS:
1. Thor
2. Boom boom Boonen
3. Spartacus
4. Steegmans
5. Devolder
@G'phant
Jeez mate, you're not having a good run are you? Glad to hear it was only a bit of bark lost for you, but your poor bike! I feel for you champ, my commiserations on the damage.
@Brett, glad it wasn't just me re: the site crashing. I was feeling a bit anxious, bit like a junkie coming down, wondering when the next fix was coming? Sweaty palms, unable to focus on anything else, irritable, itching all over....phew, dealer came through with the goods. Just sitting back warming the spoon....aah, it's all sunshine and lollipops now....
Nice little post as well
VSP PICKS:
1. Faboo
2. tomekke
3. Ballan
4. Thor de Rainbow
5. Felcher
Oh man, I so wish and hope that you are right but even if Big George was all alone, with a five minute lead, and only 100 meters to go I bet a horse or something would jump out and run him over. That guy always seems to find bad luck, no matter what the circumstances, in the Spring Classics! But I like your optimism!!!