Velominati Super Prestige: Tour de France 2012, Stage 11

During the 1969 Tour de France, Felice Gimondi and Ray Poulidor were fined for taking a ride from a lorry up the Tourmalet. What about Merkcx? Well, he was towing the lorry.

Its an old joke, but like any good joke, it stays funny no matter how many times you hear it. I bet it’s even funnier if you know what a lorry is. I knew a girl named Lori once – wasn’t funny at all – though she would give a ride to anyone who asked, so I’m assuming that’s the joke.

Merckx decimated the 1969 Tour in a way we haven’t seen in ages. On July 15 of that year, The Prophet started the day with an almost unassailable lead of somewhere around 8 minutes. Not enough, obviously. So it was, then, that his rivals’ tails wagged at the sight of him flustering with his gears near the top of the Tourmalet. A mechanical, obviously, sure to cost him loads of time. In fact, he was just moving Sur La Plaque into my personal favorite gear for climbing – the 53×17. They wouldn’t see him again that day and four hours later, his solo effort would net him another 8 minutes’ lead.

If anyone at this Tour de France wants to beat Bradley Wiggins, they’re going to have to set aside the in-vogue last-mountain attack or start putting a lot more stock in poisn’d entrails, eyes of newt, and wool of bat. Unless their strategic plan involves deliberately crashing the entirety of Team Sky or having them all come down with a synchronized sniffle, they’re going to have to start riding their bikes hard from a lot farther out than the 5km banner.

Stage 11 is the test, even though Stage 10 is also a test and may already prove me right or wrong (it will be one of those, I’m sure of it). But Stage 11 sees the finish to La Toussuire where Floyd Landis cracked and lost a mountain of time before regaining it the next day and subsequently testing positive for beer-induced testosterone. Its not a very steep climb, but its hard enough to suck if you blow up. It won’t be hard enough to drop an in-form Wiggins, so Nibali and/or Evans will have to hit the road a lot sooner than the last climb if they’re going to start making inroads. And if my boy Fränkie Schleck wants a chance at the win, he should probably start the stage today.

It’s time to ride with the breath of a cannibal.

You know the drill: get your picks in by the time the countdown clock goes to zero for a chance to win a pair of fizik R3 road shoes and two pair of DeFeet socks.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @The Oracle

    Yes well if we're quoting Shakespeare I could think of some good ones about lawyers too...

    Wiggins is saying exactly what I have been saying since it was first raised here - he gets the same stupid questions asked of him day after day when he's barely crossed the finish line, and it isn't like he has come from nowhere.

    He also made exactly the same point about his track performances - that you don't win Olympic and World pursuit titles without having a higher-grade engine than most other people on the planet. He's managed to retune that engine to the road, but it took five years.

    What's he supposed to do FFS -  he is criticised for giving stock responses, he's criticised for confronting it, and criticised for trying to be reasoned but passionate.

  • @ChrisO Don't worry, I've heard 'em all, buddy!

    All I was saying is that sometimes it's hard to turn off the lawyer instincts when dealing with the "real world" (leaving aside the debate over whether the world of professional cycling is real or surreal, of course.)  I have no real reason to suspect that Wiggo's anything but sincere.

    Wiggo's actually gone up in my estimation over the course of the Tour, and his statement just furthers that.  It's articulate and reasoned, but it also is backstopped by the filthy outburst a few days back.  I like a well-spoken guy who is also passionate and thinks deeply about what he's doing.  I'm genuinely rooting for him.

     

  • @Gerard

    do we have a Hinault - Lemod situation brewing in Team Sky.......  great stage, and good to see Wiggo and Nibali bury the hatchet ( hopefully!) at the finish line...

    We will if Wiggo is promising to work for Froome next year and doesn't. So far, so good from what I can see.

    There's a difference as well, I think, to being the leader and domestique. Froome has almost no pressure and we've seen loads of riders show promise under those circumstances only to crack when they become the leader. Not to say he would, but its one thing to race like he is when its not expected of him, and another when it is.

  • @Ron

    Yellow tape, eh? So maybe all of Wiggins's bad fashion & hair choices have been a set-up in order to make the tape look a little less ugly?

    He heard you. He rode black bars today.

  • @niksch

    @frank Excellent idea.  Any prizes for the Flamme Rouge?  I was TDY and completely spaced the original entry...

    No, this isn't kindergarten; not everyone gets a prize. The Flamme Rouge's prize can be improving their score next time round.

    @Buck Rogers

    @Bianchi Denti Nice!  You know it is sad when you really get excited for one of your favorite riders to hopefully finish in the top ten with no hope whatsoever that they'll be top five, to say nothing about the podium!

    You guys talk like you invented rooting for riders with no chance. Welcome to my world, man.

  • @frank

    @Gerard

    do we have a Hinault - Lemod situation brewing in Team Sky.......  great stage, and good to see Wiggo and Nibali bury the hatchet ( hopefully!) at the finish line...

    We will if Wiggo is promising to work for Froome next year and doesn't. So far, so good from what I can see.

    There's a difference as well, I think, to being the leader and domestique. Froome has almost no pressure and we've seen loads of riders show promise under those circumstances only to crack when they become the leader. Not to say he would, but its one thing to race like he is when its not expected of him, and another when it is.

    very true, for all Froome's great form and climbing prowess, I could potentially see him cracking a bit under pressure, whereas I think Wiggo is a bit more measured - good to see him chase down in the stage today - and great win by Millar!

  • @minion

    @Ron

    Oooh, Friday the 13th tomorrow!

    Wut? Friday the thirteenth is nearly over down here buddy. better not be Friday tomorrow, if it is I'm chucking my esky out the ute and slapping the sprogs with me thong.

    Australian's an interesting language.

    Really, what the fuck did you just say?  I'm not smart enough to figure it out.

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