Velominati Super Prestige: Tour de France 2014

Marcel’s tan lines are crisp

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have resigned themselves to hunting stage wins. The Tour swings through the Yorkshire Dales, everyone but the riders can enjoy some excellent ales. As the Tour continues to Lille, Norther France and Belgium, the quality pints continue. Yes, it’s hot and the VSP generator has beer on its mind.

The route, the sprints, the climbing and even the final time trial should make this a decent Tour. Here is a start list. Everyone will have a vial in their jersey pocket, but don’t worry, it’s legal.

It is still not too late to win the overall 2014 VSP and we have made it worth your while.

  • First place overall wins a Veloforma Strada iR Velominati Edition frame in addition to the customary VSP winner’s VVorkshop Apron
  • Second place overall wins a set of hand built CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheelset in a custom Velominati paint scheme laced to orange Chris King hubs. (CR Wheelworks is Café Roubaix’s new wheel goods brand.)
  • Third place overall wins a full Velominati V-Kit with accompanying custom orange Bont Vaypor+ road shoes.

Refer to the VSP page for details concerning scoring and rest day swaps. If you want to call yourself Pedro Delgado, you will only have yourself to blame. The VSP banner on the homepage has the countdown clock, refresh your browser and don’t be late. Good luck and good picking.

[vsp_results id=”30275″/]

Gianni

Gianni has left the building.

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  • VSP PICKS (1st Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Porte
    2. Gallopin
    3. Nibali
    4. Talansky
    5. Valverde

  • I thought I was playing it safe by picking Froome/Berto first and second at the start...until they both decided to play pick up sticks with their appendages. So now it's time to throw caution to the wind and see if I can't make myself relevant in this years VSP...as such I'm all in for Porte to make a Sky 3-peat and Valdirty gets my updated second vote.

    This is most likely the VSP equivalent of one of Jensy's ridiculous 90 km breakaways where every fan and his brother is screaming "SHUT UP LEGS" while they shoot a selfie as he rides by... regardless of the fact that he has a one in a million (5 million?) chance of making it stick.

    So in honor of that kind of wonderful futility I say "SHUT UP BRAIN" as it tells me the smart money is on The Shark to gobble up more chum on those bloody French roads as his competition continues to fracture, sublux, concuss and excoriate their way out of the race.

    A guy can dream can't he?

    VSP PICKS (1st Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Tie me kangaroo down Porte
    2. Alejandro Vileverde
    3. The Shark Nibbles
    4. Rui Alberto Faria da Costa
    5. Talansky from Miamsky

  • Floridian's Guide to Tour de France VSP picks:

    1. Make VSP picks with giddy anticipation of child waiting for Santa

    2. Become depressed and physically ill while watching VSP picks get body slammed all over roads of France for 6 days.

    3. Beat helmet-less head against wall due to inability to use crashed web site to make rest day swaps.

    4. Pray for miracles for 3 out of 5

    5. Open another beer.

  • @Gianni

    @wiscot

    @Mike_P

    @strathlubnaig

    I got to say that Fab Candelabra has really gone down in this minions opinion, his anti-cobbles rant and now quitting the tour for Septembers' worlds, wtf, if he knew he was going to need a 2 month rest he should have stayed home and let someone else have a spot.

    This. I'm really looking forward to Tony Martin kicking the crap out of him at the Worlds.

    True that. Merckx knows I love the Sparty, but Tony Panzerwagen will be top step at the worlds no matter how much Fabs and Wiggo rest up. Tony's the wee boy!

    If Fabs defense, I don't think we even wanted to ride the Tour to begin with. It's not like he took another person's spot on the team either if fucking Abandy was given a spot. They would have tapped someone from Axel's farm team to come up.

    The PanzerWagon is so cool. I want to read an interview with the poor Cannondale guy who got worked so badly trying to ride with Tony in the two man break, that was beautiful TV.

    Gianni:  JEEEEZHUS man, do you have naked posters of Sparty up in your place?  The guy's such a fuck'in wanker.  I have tried to get behind him for years and then he whines about being marked in Flanders and Roubaix every fuck'in year, and then he whines this year that the pave' have no place in the tour, of course only AFTER not winning the stage, and then he fuck'in pulls out so that he can prepare for the Worlds, showing no respect for the tour.  Fuck'in Cuntador rode 10 k on a fuck'in broken leg and Talansky is still riding to finish the stage b/c he has appropiate honour and respect for the tdf.  Fuck'in Sparty can stay home for the rest of his career for all I care.  Guy's a twatwaffle extraordinaire! 

    Rant over.  Love ya' Gianni!

  • @xyxax

    @Gianni

    Rest Day Picks! Rubbish I say. Who would not put Nibbles in now? @&#?!@?# FFS.

    Exactly.

    Seconded.  I agree with you on this one Gianni.  Like shooting fish in a barrel.  Have some self respect, people!

  • Argh. Talansky is toast.  I forgot to do swaps yesterday.  I might as well call this a loss.  2 picks confirmed DNF. One showing that he is a baller but will likely be out.  A gamble on Horner and Valverde in the wrong spot.

    Not a shining VSP moment.  But what a race.

  • This Gallopin kid is for real.  Though with a 58th place finish last year, it would be crazy ridiculous to think he finishes in the top 5.

    If Talansky finishes within the time today, I will be forever impressed.

    Totally burned on the VSP, with my top 2 out, and Porte slotted to 5th.  Maybe a 2nd rest day swap if things don't look completely hopeless.  I still don't think Nibali is a lock the way things have gone.  Been a very interesting tour this year, but unfortunately the events with wheels pointing to the sky have mattered more than the ones with wheels on the road.

  • @Buck Rogers

    @Gianni

    @wiscot

    @Mike_P

    @strathlubnaig

    I got to say that Fab Candelabra has really gone down in this minions opinion, his anti-cobbles rant and now quitting the tour for Septembers' worlds, wtf, if he knew he was going to need a 2 month rest he should have stayed home and let someone else have a spot.

    This. I'm really looking forward to Tony Martin kicking the crap out of him at the Worlds.

    True that. Merckx knows I love the Sparty, but Tony Panzerwagen will be top step at the worlds no matter how much Fabs and Wiggo rest up. Tony's the wee boy!

    If Fabs defense, I don't think we even wanted to ride the Tour to begin with. It's not like he took another person's spot on the team either if fucking Abandy was given a spot. They would have tapped someone from Axel's farm team to come up.

    The PanzerWagon is so cool. I want to read an interview with the poor Cannondale guy who got worked so badly trying to ride with Tony in the two man break, that was beautiful TV.

    Gianni: JEEEEZHUS man, do you have naked posters of Sparty up in your place? The guy's such a fuck'in wanker. I have tried to get behind him for years and then he whines about being marked in Flanders and Roubaix every fuck'in year, and then he whines this year that the pave' have no place in the tour, of course only AFTER not winning the stage, and then he fuck'in pulls out so that he can prepare for the Worlds, showing no respect for the tour. Fuck'in Cuntador rode 10 k on a fuck'in broken leg and Talansky is still riding to finish the stage b/c he has appropiate honour and respect for the tdf. Fuck'in Sparty can stay home for the rest of his career for all I care. Guy's a twatwaffle extraordinaire!

    Rant over. Love ya' Gianni!

    Not going to rub anyone's nuts here but there is a big difference when a rider is a top GC contender and one that is riding as support. And I will bet money Talansky drops the tour after his multitude of crashes.

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