Velominati Super Prestige: Tour de Suisse 2012

Andy Hampsten becomes the first North American to win a National Tour at the Tour de Suisse.

This is an exciting time of year. The Giro is in the books, the Tour is firmly in everyone’s sights, and those of us with the vaguest idea of how the big race will unfold are prognosticating the loudest as we use races that are proven to reveal fuck-all about what will happen at the Tour to predict what will happen at the Tour.

With the Dauphiné underway we look to the start of the Tour de Suisse to peer deeper into the murk to see who is riding well. As far as I’m concerned, I might as well lay out all the rider’s names in a random pattern and blow snot-rockets at the floor to make my picks this year because I honestly haven’t the foggiest idea who will take it; the biggest race of the year is spinning up to be the biggest enigma of the year.

All this babbling serves to demonstrate another important point, and the reason why the Dauphiné wasn’t in the VSP: these stage races are little more than preparation races for the big names, and a chance for the smaller one’s to take center stage. So why did the Tour de Suisse get a VSP while the Dauphiné didn’t? For starters, the latter feels less like a dress rehearsal for the Tour, but mostly its because there is a mountain pass that has cobbles all the way up it in Switzerland (though I’m not sure if they’re riding it this year). How cool is that? I can get on board with any country who values labor costs little enough to pave an entire mountain road one cobble at a time. Yes, we’re that scientific here in the Velominati Boardroom.

When this race is over, we’ll have even less of a clue as to who will win in July (well, everyone except @Marcus, who needs neither evidence nor results in order to be sure Cuddles will win) and we’ll be able to distract ourselves with the various National Championships which will take place in the week leading up the Tour’s start and guessing wether Bruyneel has the nerve to cut either or both Schlecks from his Tour team.

So, dust off your monkey’s bones and 12-sided die, time to make your predictions for the 2012 Tour de Suisse. Check the Tour de Suisse site for the latest route and roster info and remember that since this is a stage race, (not a Grand Tour), points on offer are 10 for first place, 8 for second, 7 for third, 5 for fourth, and 3 for fifth – all based on the final General Classification; plus two bonus points per rider in the top five regardless of the rider’s placing. Get your picks in by the time the countdown clock goes to zero, and pray for an intervention. Make sure you check the mappings of your picks before the race ends so you get the points you deserve, and use the dispute mechanism to alert us of any issues. Note that the dispute mechanism is the official means by which to raise concerns about your picks; questions about your mappings or disputes raised in the posts will be largely ignored.

Good luck.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Gianni says:

Jun 17 2012 at 10:27 am

@ChrisO

Practicing what I preach, I was the only person to have Costa in any position, and one of only two to have Ituralde.

I'm very impressed with Costa and very impressed you picked him. I really didn't know anything about him before this race.

@Steampunk
nice pick too. Why did I pick Lovkvist as my dark horse? Because I thought he might finally do something? Wrong. He is the Linus Gerdemann (sp?) of Sky.
Steampunk says:

Jun 17 2012 at 11:49 am

@Gianni

You and me, both. I keep waiting for LÃ¶vkvist to jump up and say "look at me!" with a breakout ride. The guy's got all the tools: decent climber, strong TT, etc., and Sky's given him every chance to shine. But he doesn't seem able to hang in there.
versio says:

Jun 17 2012 at 3:50 pm

@San Tonio

@versio

Kreuziger, I have foreseen your destiny. Fourth!

you mean sixth and out of the VSP.

No... I picked Kreuziger as 4th. Would not have picked him as 6th?
Sauterelle says:

Jun 17 2012 at 3:56 pm

@ChrisO

I originally had Costa in 4th place then swapped him out for Fuglsang. Argh.
frank says:

Jun 17 2012 at 4:35 pm

@Gianni

Thanks for covering the results, matey - awesome race!
frank says:

Jun 17 2012 at 5:35 pm

@ChrisO

The Velominati VSP... Gesink, Cunego, Kreuziger, Valverde and Leipheimer.

So we continue our less than 50% success rate.

Practising what I preach, I was the only person to have Costa in any position, and one of only two to have Ituralde.

Two people had Schleck in second, and Leipheimer was a popular choice in third with 15 picks, while Gesink had five votes for fourth.

I haven't had a chance to look through all the stuff you sent me - will do soon though. I'm glad we're reinforcing the fact that we know fuck all about racing. That's promising.
frank says:

Jun 17 2012 at 5:48 pm

@ChrisO

@frank

Which leads me to mention that the wild forest-boy in Germany has turned out not to be feral and uncivilised, just Dutch.

Or, as Keeper Jim says, "It's typically Dutch: accurate but awkward."

@Monkeyscat

To quote Nigle Powers, "There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch".

One. Of. The. Best. Lines. Ever.

So sorry I missed these jokes when they were relevant.
ChrisO says:

Jun 17 2012 at 8:08 pm

@Steampunk

Nieve has had an odd string of 10th place finishes. Two in the Vuelta and two in the Giro. He's 28 years old - if he can find a team that will support him going for GC he might get up to the podium places.
Giles says:

Jun 17 2012 at 8:38 pm

Bugger me. 10 points, how did that happen? I am in shock. That'll be the last you see of me on the VSP podium though.

Incidentally a compliment to the regulars on here, love your work. It makes office time so much more bearable.
Tobin says:

Jun 17 2012 at 9:07 pm

Hey! 9 points for me...way better than the -41 I dropped on the Giro...